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  1. S

    Not Relationship Material In Any Sense Of The Word

    HI SoL Yes we have conversed about this before. :) I am in a very similar situation to you. It was like a light bulb moment when I associated my mother with being manipulative, it was like everything started to make sense. She was also materialistic, egotistic and non maternal. But she...
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    News Church's Emphasis On Marriage

    HI Perfectly flawed. I also think that how the church portrays the perfect wedding, family and unity of man and women is based on the purity that Christ and God wanted to see as a basis for happiness and godliness. The man must cherish the women, the women be just for that man. When you...
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    Shoulder Surgery Tomorrow

    Best of luck for surgery and hope for a speedy recovery and return. Best wishes Saffy
  4. S

    Not Relationship Material In Any Sense Of The Word

    Hi SoL I know what you mean. I used to think like htis all the time. If someone said something good, I would mistrust them, I would think they had ulterior motives or was just lying to keep the peace or to be nice. I realised that it was because I did not believe it myself. I did not...
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    Social Rules/boundaries

    Hi strongernow I understand this. I found that even though I thought I was being open, what I was telling people was more to do with validation or for them to 'understand'. I realised that what I thought was open was far too descriptive or intense for most people I know, it made it...
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    Not Relationship Material In Any Sense Of The Word

    Hi scared of lonely. I read this with interest and see you are projecting your thoughts onto others. :) I know I do it myself. I think I am worthless and think that everyone else also thinks that. Which is the wrong thing to do really. I have learnt that now. Turn that around to...
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    Films For Human Behaviour

    I like Meryl Streep too, so I will take your advice and try find it on amazon. Thanks Albatross. :) best wishes Saffy :)
  8. S

    Films For Human Behaviour

    Never heard of that, Thanks Albatross :) best wishes Saffy
  9. S

    The Wish Game With A Twist (Just A Bit Of Fun)

    your wish is granted. You can not see or hear them even though they are in sight. They are invisible to you. I wish I could see my kids and grandkids more. :)
  10. S

    Not Relationship Material In Any Sense Of The Word

    Hi Scaredoflonely, Sometime I think there are a lot of pressure for people thinking they have to be in a relationship. For me I felt deep sense of loneliness sometimes. But in a way I also have no idea of what I want. Is it like that for you? I also recognised from your first post that...
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    Films For Human Behaviour

    NOt at all Eleanor lol :) I will look out for your suggestions too. I have seen Field of Dreams but not for a long time, so I will be interested in seeing what I get from the movie now. Ill look for Harvey, Is that the invisible rabbit? I've just ordered the magic of bell island...
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    The Concept Of An Inner Child... Not Really Buying It

    Hi Hashi Yes it is more to do with a state of being rather than a behaviour or a regression to being a child. For me it more about a way of thinking. A way of ridding myself of dark and harmful thoughts that manifest from memories of my past and of fears for my future. For me to find inner...
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    A One-minute Vacation From Ptsd...

    Hi Pioneerson I totally understand where you are in your vacation. I also for years have suffered and just could not shift this perpetual thought process I had about myself and the world. I read a book called practising the power of now and this, similar to you, has taught me how to sit in...
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    The Concept Of An Inner Child... Not Really Buying It

    Hi Hashi When I think of the inner child I think of a sense of innocent thoughts about things. About thinking without jealousy, hatred, bitterness, anger and all the other dark thoughts developed as we grow depending on our environments and past experiences. The inner child would be free of...
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    Films For Human Behaviour

    Thank everyone. I will look out for your suggestions. I find it interesting to learn about human behaviour and how it affects others and ourselves, sometimes without knowing it. I think that I had such a skewed idea of human behaviour because of my past, that learning about it has really...
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    Films For Human Behaviour

    I like to watch films that show human behaviours. Some of the films show different attitudes, some show inner conflict and how it affect others. I find these very interesting and emotional. Does anyone else feel this? Some of my recent films have been: 12 angry men: twelve men jurors...
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    Parents Want To "understand"...help?

    HI Emma You have been very brave and open so far with us and your parents. Give yourself credit for this at least. Your father sounds like he is a little more empathic than your mother, and her actions sound quite cold. My mother was a teacher, god help those kids, and her mentality...
  18. S

    Question For Sufferers Who Have Ever Pushed A Loved One Away.

    Hi In regards to sabotaging my relationships with men, I would not say I felt guilty but regretted some of the actions and disappointed in myself for letting irrational thoughts affect what could have been really good. I have had to learn to recognise what my fears are and whether they are...
  19. S

    Relationships?

    Hi KimmerM I think we all feel damaged and sometimes it feels that there is no self worth. Personal growth can allow you to adapt and be able to cope with these feelings a lot better. You certainly do have the power to change the way you think about yourself. It takes time and a lot of...
  20. S

    Parents Want To "understand"...help?

    Hi Emma I think by what you have said it is even more important now that they know the full facts of PTSD. Giving them your printouts will give them time to read and digest the facts better and with hopefully come to understand the dynamics of it. Without this knowledge they can only...
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    Parents Want To "understand"...help?

    Hi Emma I would think it would be important to make it clear that there is not a competition about how intense you and your parents find certain things. But that things that they might take for granted or might make them feel slightly uncomfortable is on a much higher anxiety scale for you...
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    Why Wouldn't They Trust Me?

    Hi cookinggal I know how their actions can get too you. Have you actually spoken to them about this. actually sat them down and told them how it makes you feel and ask them why they feel the need to do it? Sometimes what we think is the motive, ie lack of trust, is not actually the...
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    Relationships?

    Hi Lonelyone I understand that believe me. I am 46 now and felt like you do for years and years sabotaging all my relationships for fear I was not good enough and that I would be discarded like an old bike. My self loathing just would not let me believe that I could choose when and who I...
  24. S

    Called "racist" When I Informed A Friend His Behaviour Was A Trigger

    He needs to get to grips with his own issues instead of thrusting them on other people. As long as you know you are not a racist then let him go on his merry way. People who listen to him are not important to you. If they were they would know you are not what he claims. Resorting to...
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    Called "racist" When I Informed A Friend His Behaviour Was A Trigger

    Yes. And I realised that it is part of their own issues of inferiority, minority and a big chip on their shoulder. Any form of aggression is bad no matter what colour people are. Getting your point across aggressively, as your friend is doing is about how he sees himself and his own issues...
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