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@Rumors I first replied sex of the abuser does not matter but I see your point. The woman that abused me also groomed me to please her male partner also as she watched. He was rough and mean she was kind and loving. As an adult I gravitated to female relationships with older women. I have...

I am female and was abused by an older female when I was ages 15 to 18 she was in her 30's. I blocked a lot out. Until she reached out to me on social media 25 years later. I agree sex does not matter it is all abuse.

My therapist when collecting myself before leaving would always say: "go to the bathroom and put water on your face and hands if you need to." I know she means it as a way to get grounded before driving. She knows I have had trauma in a bathroom but never put the two together. It always bothered...

Yes this would happen to me. My t said it was a part of my brain shutting down. One thing that helps me with talking about very difficult subjects riddled with shame and dissociation. Is to build up tolerance. I might talk for a minute (literally) then we take a break and chit chat, or sip...

I have one question and I am sorry if I missed it in another thread. Are you planning on going back to the t you love after her sabbatical? If so I would definitely go with first T and get the support you need and work on your targeted goals. If not I would go with the most trauma informed...

I have not but my co-worker has. I am fascinated by it. We work closely and talk a lot all day. He now lives on the west coast and we are on the east so they don't see each other but they still do correspond. Nothing was ever sexual but friends, yes.

Whipporwill in Utah.

I left my wife 6 months after our marriage. I am female also. I developed PTSD and had severe reactions after an abuser reached out to me weeks before our wedding. Trauma I had compartmentalized. I never felt I could leave because I was enmeshed with a person with anger issues and her own...

This came up for me too in a different way. My regular T never requires eye contact. I can look at her for a bit in the beginning, then my eyes wander off the rest of the session. I glance here and there but mostly stare at her shoes. I can talk about stuff but never looking in the face. Then I...

Yes I believe that is what happen too and I am totally okay with it. I was dreading that she would want to dissect last week. Thanks for everyones input. Have a good night.

Went back to therapy today and there was no mention of last week. She just directed back to were we left off a few weeks and back into EMDR. That was it.

Thank you for your responses. I hear everything that is being said and will probably have to reread a few times to have all sink in. **to have it all sink in...

I lied to my therapist. A bold faced lie, one that got me out of processing an issue with her. She believed it and moved on. But then it ate at me. And ate at me and ate at me. My self-worth went down the drain. I looked for other therapists. I couldn't move forward and stalled for a few...

Yes I am going through it now. With two issues. Different situation but same premise. My friday session I need to talk to her about this and I am scared to death. I can get very protective of my t and not want to share things with her in fear to it will be to much for her. For a year I...

I am in a town in western North Carolina also and had 99.8% coverage. Three planets lining up is pretty cool. I loved when it got dark and the crickets came out.

I take gabapentin. 300mg in the morning 300mg in afternoon and 1200 at night. It has never helped me with my sleep. It has help me not have so much anxiety and be a little more even keel. The more intensely I was digging into my trauma. Two weeks ago a woman at the gym saw me using therapy...

Yes falling forward into my lap, numb or crying, I vacillated between the two. My t calls it collapsing.

You do have the strength. Tho it was a one time event the10 sessions also accounted for a learning curve - I was mauled by 2 dogs I thought I was going to be left for dead. Keep talking and typing into the forum. You are not alone at all. Very brave to be facing it.

My t says often to me the defense mechanisms that protected us back then are not needed now and it takes time learning to adjust to feeling those feelings. We also played with different ways of EMDR (using the hand buzzers over watching fingers). Using buzzers was hard for me because I found it...

Same thing happen to me. My ability to dissociate came front and center. I have had to really work on grounding exercises. Have you gone over grounding techniques?

It is hard when t's take a break. You might try doing a search on this forum and you find a lot of previous posts about this topic. I found them helpful the first few times this had happen to me.

Thanks Watundah After some contemplation two things came into play: I think I was lumping my ex's behavior as a t with sloppy confidentiality onto my t. I realized this as I ran into my t and her husband in the grocery store sunday night (after posting on here). I freaked, they were checking...

Thank you for the replies. I have read then over trying to digest everything. I agreed there is a middle ground and thought maybe because of what I am going to describe below a different conversation would of happen. No, they don't share a receptionist. I have my t's personal phone number...

Thank you for the replies and your perspectives. Kilted you wrote out what I could not explain in my head thank you for breaking it all down, it has given me a lot to think about. I guess I was expecting a little more conversation from her and was thrown off by the "Nope didn't happen" off the...

I have a t that I have a good relationship with and would say from all I have read on here she is a good t too. I saw her first 7 years ago when she was in practice by herself for about a year. Then there was a five year break. Then started to see her again Feb of last year. This time her office...