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I started to write, but then realized what I was posting was probably better off a topic for my journal, so I started one. But wanted to say that I can empathize with how the role someone else's mental illness combined with religion can have a huge effect on us.

I was so angry when I read your first post @Wyakin and then so relieved to read your update on how the meeting went. Its so true as others have said...if only it was as easy as "not allowing" an illness to affect our lives. More people should do this! Right?! Im sorry that you had to hear...

Welcome, and Im glad you found your way here too. I really struggled, and still do at times, with "deserving" the label / treatment and care for PTSD. When I go to the VA hospital, and see the other vets there, yeah...I feel like, what the heck am I doing here? Like Im taking away from the...

Thats very true @Crayon ...I know with my last ex, I would sit in amazement while he would say he feels like hes nowhere in life, that something is missing, and he was just constantly complaining about everything and everyone. Yet, he makes a very good living in a dream career that most people...

I really appreciate that @intothelight! Yeah, throwing myself into keeping busy and keeping all focus off myself and what is going on inside is pretty much how I have lived my life. Its especially hard right now, because I've been single for so long...and what helped me was to throw myself...

Yeah, Im right there with you. It wasn't a conscious decision though... well, maybe in a way it was. Things weren't good at home, and my mother always warned me to not say anything to anyone, and that I better put a smile on my face or else. And that's just something I took with me...no...

Oh my, I just posted about how I don't know what my triggers are. I too don't get flashbacks, but I'm totally fine with that...that is one symptom that I am very happy I don't have to deal with because it just sounds brutal. What I guess I am jealous of is having no clue what my triggers...

Anywhere from a few hours to a few months... I'm still at the point where I'm not entirely aware of what my triggers are. In therapy I would say they come out of nowhere, but she would say *something* started it, its just that I go from 0-100 so fast that I don't recognize what triggered me...

That is what scares me @shimmerz ... there is something about me that attracts me to this type of guy, and in turn attracts these types of guys to me. So now, I don't trust my judgement. And even so, either way...they all end up leaving anyway. So I just really feel like Im much better off...

The best I can say really, is to come to terms with it that the people who are doing this need to be cut out of your life. I had to do this, it was a long process, and even now the words and intent linger strong in my mind. But at the least, they are not there to continue to validate and...

Can only let you know... I read this and just thew up an entire post, in my head, that I can't even actually write or else I will just fall apart here. Its almost like all you have to do is cheat, lie, manipulate, take advantage of and then throw away someone who cares and loves you while...

I am so sorry to hear this... I too have a history, and the feeling has ebbed and flowed through the years. I now carry a card with a Veterans Suicide Hotline everywhere I go...just in case. I have not used it yet, its just my security blanket I guess you can say. But I really urge you to...

This is something I struggle with, and have yet to be able to realize. On "paper" I am a decent person with a lot to offer, Ive had friends and family describe me in a really good light. Its nice to hear, but in reality...well, my reality, that would all go out the window if they really got to...

I really like the idea of this and the tips here, and am going to do some research on this. At the moment, my only method of grounding is guided meditation... but its not always (hardly ever) possible find a place to hide, pop in my headphones and get YouTube up on my phone. I've done it...but...

Welcome, and thanks so much for sharing. It's great that you were able to get diagnosed and on the path to something more than what you have been trying to deal with on your own up til this point. I can relate to what you were feeling with the fear of not being able to make it, and then the...

:hug: for you too! (I finally just found all the smilies on here, so please bear with me :wacky: hehe!) I was thinking the same thing myself here... I could feel myself falling, which led me to getting online to look for a community, and after reading, joining and now delving into this forum...

PTSD is an anxiety disorder, the very aspect of our lives in having it is the inability to handle stress or have a level of anxiety that is the the same as someone with a "normal" bout of anxiety or stress related situations. Now there isnt one size fits all anyway though. When I was going to...

I'm like those who hide behind laughter and joking... it separates me from what is actually happening, so that I'm looking at it from the outside in from a distance. It does vary... sometimes Ill flip my lid and completely overreact, other times Ill crack a joke and completely underreact, but...

I'm sorry to hear this has happened to you... was your husband also threatening or abusive? I only ask because PTSD develops after life threatening events, or situations where one feels trapped and powerless, such as sexual assault, being held captive / hostage. It triggers your body to be...

Oh no! I just saw page 2 when I posted and am editing my message. I'm sorry to hear that you had to give her up! That is heartbreaking.

Hi @BeatenMan I do agree that it definitely is assuring to be able to do research and get a grasp on it that what you're going through is real and that you're not alone in this. But it is not so much a matter of being hung up on what is proper and official, but more on not being hung up on any...

Try guided meditation... I can get really wound up, thinking at a fast rate about everything, cant sleep, dont eat...Im just racing. It takes me a while to even realize what is happening but as soon as I do, I now get on YouTube where I saved some guided meditation..and it helps *a lot*...

I do have C-PTSD, but it was a combination of physical, sexual, and the type of verbal abuse that Fadeaway mentions. So I could't say one way or another about your experience, and do agree that seeing a professional to properly diagnose you is important. Also, something Ive noticed, just in...

On one hand I want to be alone, on the other hand I'm afraid of being alone. I can't even make up my mind! I think though, for the most part I want to be alone because I'm afraid once someone gets to know me, they will realize they can do better, and I think in a way, I end up sabotaging...

I'm so glad I could help! And you helped me too...it gives me hope to see an SO care enough to want to understand and be compassionate, because sometimes I really wonder if that is possible. :)