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  1. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Service doggy, or doggy plain I guess, throwing up a lot today. Nothing left in her system. Gave her her liver and gallbladder meds early to try to help. She took them happily and is watching me closely and eagerly for signs of her Dino chicken nuggets being ready, so I think that’s helped a...
  2. littleoc

    Struggles with Trauma Triggers in Close Friendship

    Having a healthy relationship takes practice. I'm imagining you both need to work on boundaries, but only you can control your own actions. As in, if I were in your shoes, the first thing I would do is pick apart what is my business and what isn't. Because what you have described is not healthy...
  3. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    I was unable to make it to my therapy appointment today, but I did get extra rest :) I am watching videos on youtube about the impact that killed most life and the dinosaurs, and how the impact actually worked. Winds over that of a category 5 hurricane -- and over jet stream speed -- seem like...
  4. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Three things I'm grateful for: Petting cats. I have 100 cats and they all love me and trust me I got to make it to the spirit halloween 50% off sale before they put things in storage to sell next year. It was still expensive, but I got to grab a funny flamingo hat that I saw last year that...
  5. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Wish I could think 🤔 react to you Freida :P I'm not sure if I vibe (so to speak) with the "one day it'll all be worth it" idea. I am certainly better overall, but in the here and now is all I really have. So if here and now isn't right enough somehow, then I can't really care about the some...
  6. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    I was finally able to get some chores done :)
  7. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    I feel like I got a lot better, but with little actual benefit. Does that make sense?
  8. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    I pasted that here because I think it's an important thing to have noticed about myself. I was following instincts, and that may be why I'm constantly fighting the urge to "disappear" and drive to the ocean and never come back. Now days I also have a conflicting instinct, which is to stay near...
  9. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    I appreciate that. Just here to post some word vomit i randomly texted to a friend after being grossed out by the bathroom floor.
  10. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Im sorry. It really feels that no matter what I do, I fail at it. I can’t seem to get anything right. I want to drive to the ocean and disappear. I wish people could just forget me.
  11. littleoc

    [United States] Neighborhood harassment

    Update: I cleaned up the yard and didn't find any code violations. And barely a trash bag full of litter. My bestie thinks it's likely my dad got in contact with him and tried to do another weird attempt to get us out of the house so he can have it. He is likely not smart enough to understand...
  12. littleoc

    [United States] Neighborhood harassment

    Some slight aftermath is that the neighbor across the street, who happens to live where a pedo who kept me there used to live, is "siding" with Harassment Neighbor because he's HIS drug dealer lol Is this real. Am I in middle school? That guy's got kids though so hopefully he watches it. I...
  13. littleoc

    [United States] Neighborhood harassment

    👀 My dad called today and after the second call I did answer, but he didn't have anything to say about it, so hopefully he's got nothing to do with it. (His call was mainly to say he's lonely and knows he did it to himself) So hopefully all good. I'm about to pick up scraps in the yard and...
  14. littleoc

    [United States] Neighborhood harassment

    I found out today that that neighbor man is (or was one of) my dad's drug dealers, so maybe that's related 🙄 my dad called my mom and left a voicemail asking "to talk" after 14 years of my mom avoiding him, so. That's certainly related. Just saying my lil affirmations. "One day I'll have my own...
  15. littleoc

    [United States] Neighborhood harassment

    Thank y'all ❤️ Lol it feels surreal, but yeah, cool for this time.
  16. littleoc

    [United States] Neighborhood harassment

    Just making sure I'm doing this right. My next door neighbor came into my yard today and screamed slurs, other things, seemingly mad about either my grass or trash in the yard. (I tried to get clarification and couldn't get any. I had had packages delivered that day and was in the middle of...
  17. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Maybe I shouldn't casually invalidate myself. But having money did help me get a sense of control back in my life and that helped a lot
  18. littleoc

    Lost Cooking Skills: Need Help Relearning Basics

    I feel this is on topic, no worries. I'd also like to know 👀 ETA: there is another thread like this also by me in social called "What are you having for dinner today (want to share your recipe?)?" or something like that that you can also try, that one gets posted to pretty regularly and has...
  19. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Disability check my beloved 😭 🎉 Also, I'm doing better this week. I don't know why but I'm not going to question it or purposely make myself worse, so. Uh, yeah, I hope y'all are doing well, I guess I just had to go through something 🙄
  20. littleoc

    Navigating a Toxic Relationship in High School

    Of course I still care ❤️ So sorry it had to get that bad before you were removed from that situation, but so, so happy it's working out! 🫂 I was hoping you'd get a good outcome. Thank you for updating, and stay well ❤️‍🩹
  21. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    I hope you're feeling better now 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂 I don't have much to say but I think I got approved for disability benefits so that's nice 🎉
  22. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Three positives: Taz, Kiki, Slinky, Xavie, Beanbag, Señor Nacho (él solo habla español, pero un poco ingles ahora), Nestle, Dove, Nudge, Cleo, and every pet ive ever had who is not with us now I'm not hungry Am caught up and staying caught up on all chores and animal care this month Three...
  23. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    At least we can all guarantee I'll never have to be a child again (in this lifetime or whatever you believe) :) that sucked ✨
  24. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    There's more to life than meets the eye and it's completely unexplainable edit to add: in a good way
  25. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Goal for today: have so much fun on my one-day vacation I forgot to ask what's next, lol. Just schedule something to look forward to, maybe. Maybe I'll make a detailed mega-data-sheet in Microsoft excel/Google sheets/open office Calc of what things I want in a house. Maybe I'll make blueprints...
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