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Thanks for stating that. I get that and it makes sense. I often feel ashamed of my reactions, but I know they are realand have causes,

These were definitely a trigger. My ability to function went way down. It is hard sometimes to keep the labels straight one some things and I am probably guilty of mislabeling things at times, but this was truly an incident where my ability to function was dwindling the more that I stared at...

This weekend, I felt horrible (and not just because of the knee surgery). It seemed like I was falling apart. Looking at the Christmas tree, which normally gives me great joy, couldn't even bring me peace. I had a session with my therapist today and identified a trigger. I have slowly been...

bottle

I realize the MyPSTD pro is related to the site. It's just intereating to see!

Thank you everyone. Thank you for the reminder that it is normal to feel nervous before surgery. I did okay overall. Once I got there, saw the new to me area, saw a nurse I have had before, and saw my doctor, I settled some. I took my klonopin before I went. The initial sedation before the...

I have knee surgery scheduled for this morning. I am very anxious even though through the same procedure on my right last year. I find it hard when I get anxious in these kinds of situations. Because the surgery is not in control, my brain automatically goes into panic and I seem to forget my...

I didn't even see that label of PTSD pro. I know I have definitely been called worse. I was fortunate enough to see my therapist in person this summer. We do Zoom through the winter because she goes south, but it was a lot harder to transition back after seeing her in person after a year and a...

I haven't been on in a few years. I looked and saw my last post before yesterday was in 2018 about my precious kitties deaths. I have been working really hard on my healing journey and been doing well at it overall. I even managed to start feeling some anger and making decisions for what's...

I don't know what your insurance is like, but they do take insurance for the trauma unit. They do not for the Retreat. I have had great experiences on the trauma unit in the past. I've been several times, but this is the longest time I've gone between admissions which is great but it gives me...

I have been to Sheppard-Pratt several times in the past. However, it has been over two years since I have last been. I have always found it to be super helpful. I know there have been a lot of changes in the last two years. I am curious if anyone has been there more recently and can just...

I have struggled with eating and when in a hospital it was labeled as "unspecified eating disorder" because it doesn't really fit into any one category such as anorexia or bulimia. I struggle the most with remembering to eat. I just go about my day and never remember to stop and eat until...

@zombycat , I did a little searching. Are they all from Gorillaz? My cats were named Remus and Tonks.

Thank you all for your very kind and supportive responses. My family and I miss out kitties terribly, but we have been out looking at kittens twice. We haven't found the right ones yet though so we'll keep searching through "kitten season". @bellbird , if we get orange kittens we are thinking...

While I was away at a hospital getting treatment in December, our cat, Remus, had to be put to sleep be he unexpectedly was full of cancer. He had a clean bill or health in October, so whatever the cancer what it was quick in overcoming him. Remus was more my husband's cat than mine, but when...

Welcome to the forum. It is a great place to get support with your struggles. I haven't been having as severe problems as you have described. I am on my own all day until my family comes home. I end up staying in bed a lot to feel safer when I am alone. Sometimes even when they are home...

I have a 7 lb twin sized blanket. It's perfect for me and I've had it for a few years. They usually recommend 10% of your body weight, but I found that too heavy. I am lucky enough that there is a manufacturer with a small store so I got to feel it out first. Maybe there is a sensory store...

@The Albatross I love Girl Interrupted both the book and movie.

Hope is coming.

Rainbows shine brightly.

Today, I'm scared.

Fall doesn't last.

I don't even know all of my abusers (as the DID parts keep the identity of some still locked away). One of my therapists that I see when I am in the hospital asked what I thought would happen if I tried to confront an abuser. She said the abuser would most likely not validate my feelings or...

If it is anxiety, try some relaxation techniques like breathing ones or some guided meditation or whatever might work for you. I have the tingling in the hands and the breathing can help for me, but usually I need some sort of medication as well because it means I am super anxious. I...

I am reading Rising Strong by Brene Brown. And for my younger parts I am reading The Babysitters Club: The Ghost at Dawn's House. For therapy I am reading Dissociative Identity Disorder Sourceboo, C-PTSD from Surviving to Thriving, and Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation.