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The OP started the thread and wrote a fairly substantial discourse about FGM - and the thread is entitled Genital Mutilation which can happen to both sexes. If you want to specifically discuss your trauma, as opposed to the wider issues around genital mutilation, perhaps it is you who needs a...

Context does matter enormously - to call both “surgeries” denies the context of FGM, which holds no medical benefits and is done entirely from a place of controlling the sexuality of women. I wouldn’t argue male circumcision is ok, I’m female and don’t have a dog in that fight but to compare...

I’d echo the need to check their qualifications and experience very carefully. Someone with no training, but good energy is fine if you’re just looking for a mentor or a friend. Letting someone loose on your psyche however is a completely different thing. Letting someone loose on your...

To be diagnosed with PTSD there needs to have been a Criterion A trauma which means the individual needs to have experienced or been exposed to actual or threatened death, serious injury or sexual assault. I’d say that unless there was a real and credible threat to life or bodily integrity then...

No pressure at all. What happened was that my mum died, very suddenly and unexpectedly, I definitely experienced that as trauma. Her death triggered of a whole string of family dynamics that were very controlling and frankly quite abusive - so I had old pre-existing trauma flare up at the same...

And so what begins?

It very much depends on where you are, in the U.K. I’d agree - psychiatrists are the only people qualified to make a diagnosis - even psychologists (who are trained to doctorate level) will talk about formulation rather than diagnosis however in other parts of the world psychotherapists are also...

Dissociation is a natural, normal reaction at the time of trauma - it’s part of the mechanism that kicks off flight or fight reactions and is why people often have hazy or partial memories initially of something like a car accident. Dissociation that gets stuck is the stuff that leaves you numb...

I think it’s a tricky one, sometimes it really is a case of just one more minute and it’s done, whereas staring again is another 15 minutes of discomfort etc. I also think the level of intimacy really matters too - someone doing an internal exam had better listen to me when I say stop. In...

What was it that happened 20 minutes before your post that’s sparked you needing to talk about trauma? You might find giving that some space will really help.

The thing is, those things can help - I know that talking to myself kindly, speaking to people, letting myself trust others are good for me, but they don’t stop me feeling shameful at all. Those things do help me when I’m feeling triggered, do help keep me grounded etc. But shame can totally...

It’s not the first time I’ve booked another session within 24 hours of the last, or seen my T twice in 48 hours. If you need support it’s fine to ask for it - I’d certainly not be leaving things for two weeks time.

Lots of food for thought here. I’m not sure I see vulnerability as the antidote to shame, I feel shameful about being vulnerable which doesn’t help heal shame. I had a long talk with my T about shame yesterday - trying to figure out how to let go of that feeling that I’m less than, which I know...

I never said you were being childish or indeed criticised your decisions regarding your treatment so I’m not quite sure what you’re responding to in all honesty. You said your neurologist didn’t want to know when the seizures were found to be caused by something not neurological. It makes sense...

This is be. Literally no one who knew me on a professional level, or a casual friends basis would think I was remotely shameful. I am generally super confident- the confidence that comes with working hard to be good at what I do. But under that I can be stopped in my tracks with shame. It’s been...

That’s the thing though - I honestly don’t think success or otherwise makes a difference when it comes to shame. Shame is there for me, all pervasive and ever present - I can even feel shameful about “success”. It’s a bloody nonsense but it’s there, sticky and stuck. And yes @EveHarrington...

I get that it was an analogy, but it was a rubbish comparison tbh because the type of seizure totally matters in terms of treatment. To stay with your example, what did you expect a neurologist to do once they knew your seizures weren’t a neurological issue? They can’t treat mental health...

Shame. It’s sticky stuff. I’ve been working on my own feelings of shame for years and realised today that I’m still in it. Not even feeling shame about abuse or trauma - it’s not a feeling attached to a particular event. It’s all consuming, free floating, every area of my life shame. Logically...

Why does your inner child feel ignored? Does your T work with an “inner child” model - many don’t which could leave you feeling ignored if that’s important to you. How do you know it’s your inner child feeling ignored and when does that become you feeling ignored or disregarded? I know some of...

Get a more accurate diagnosis perhaps? The ever widening criteria for PTSD hasn’t necessarily served people well because the idea of PTSD being a treatable disorder where recovery is possible has gotten lost in the mix of what can be a very debilitating illness. Post trauma stress is a very...

I don’t think you are strong enough on your own - you need to work as a team on this. Do any of your parts communicate with each other? There’s a great workbook with exercises that can really help in the absence of therapy - it’s called Coping with Trauma Related Dissociation and it’s a skills...

If you can find his book On Becoming a Person, it’s a series of papers and lectures which is really worth reading for folk interested in a potentiality/growth model of wellbeing and therapy. A simpler read is Stephen Joseph’s Positive Therapy which translates the theory into more modern...

I actually think this is key to good mental health regardless of diagnosis - being able to move through the world, connected to the here and now in a way that feels consistent with the person you are. It’s the core premise of Client Centred Therapy founded by Carl Rogers, which I think is...

I’m glad you have support but I’d suggest caution here - as the time comes closer for you to leave, your mum may get very scared and share your plans with your dad. Not because she would want to betray you but because she’s in a very unsafe, controlling relationship and there’s nothing so...

The best way to help her is to be fully independent and standing on your own two feet, so that if/when she is ready you can show her how it’s done. Put your own oxygen mask on first.