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It sounds like a good idea to give yourself time now to deal with the emotion of what happened. You’ve dealt with the practicalities - but everyone here knows that’s not the only consideration. Of course you’ll be shaken and unsettled by this - when I’m feeling unsafe like that I curl up with a...

I hear you’re comfortable with your decision and I honestly don’t want to shake that but her working with your mum in any capacity is a very real ethical issue. She can’t have any communication with your mum about you that doesn’t confirm you were her client - your mum knowing that from you is...

Shes right that you can’t deal with past abuse if it’s not in the past - for me that’s meant deciding the level at which I engage with my wider family. Some relationships are close, some aren’t. I see my dad occasionally and always on my terms. You don’t need to make a big announcement, just...

It may be worth reading around the forum to see if this is the kind of place you need. There’s everything from careful handholding support to very direct, honest feedback and all shades in between. Have a read, see what you think and if you want to stay, create an account and get to know us.

Well done you - such a good decision. Now you get to choose for yourself the best person to support you.

I think that’s absolutely fine to send her. Clear and to the point. I honestly don’t think you’ll easily find yourself in an abusive relationship again - each time we deal with this kind of thing it sets a new model for the way we think. You questioned what happened, sought views in a place you...

There’s a reason therapists shouldn’t work with folk that are known to them - the boundaries here are so blurred as to get in the way of therapy. You really need to end with her and either sort something out where you pay or see what other options are open to you. Ethically she shouldn’t even...

She may also both work for an agency and have a private practice - it’s not unusual at all for therapists to have more than one place of work in the U.K.

It sounds like you’ve had a real bump with this one, I’d agree with getting some medical care for your injuries and keep talking it through. Just so you know, I took the trigger warning out of your post - we don’t use them here but I didn’t want you to wonder what had happened to your post.

It might be worth thinking about why you feel your T needs to know the stuff that you’re holding on to. Is it because the knowledge would change the work you’re doing together, or just because you think your T should know it - ie that there’s a moral imperative to tell all? The first option, I’d...

CBT and DBT are manualised, skills based therapies, they’re designed to be delivered in a particular way and aren’t about delving into the past other than to determine which skills you need to challenge thoughts, moderate behaviours etc. The role of the therapist isn’t to validate you, it’s to...

When you’re screaming for help, what are you hoping they’ll do? There are lots of possible ways to help in his kind of situation, eg talking to you about active coping strategies you can adopt, giving you space to vent, advocating for you in terms of your thesis, offering emotional support...

Reading through it seems like a circular discussion happening here just now. I hear that you just want someone to see how hurt you are about all of this and folk saying “you need to acknowledge your part in it” isn’t helping because you feel you have, but that your former employer is more...

No one here can tell you what may or may not have happened in your childhood, I hear that you’re worried but what generally happens on this type of thread is that some people say “you’ve definitely been abused” others say “lots of things - or nothing - might have happened” and the original...

How long have you been working with her, she may have formed that opinion over however many sessions where you’ve talked about him and her experience of meeting him. She may have been round the block a few times and got a good feel about your husband as a person and seeing your relationship with...

Its not the first time I’ve sent an email like that; or written something, given it to her to read in session and then felt the tonne weight of my own vulnerability. The wait to see her or the silence in session feels incredible but she consistently is measured, caring, respectful and gentle in...

My T mentions the timeframe of a particular trauma of mine and I wriggle every single time she does it - it’s become a standing connection between us that she’ll mention it and comment on my reaction. She does it to remind me just how strong, determined and tolerant I am - many people would have...

Functional, as in able to work, manage personal hygiene, keep house, not go crazy at the kids? That took about 3 months of time at home and work in therapy. Functional being less symptomatic time took about 2 years. Functional as in putting trauma behind me and knowing who I want to be now...

I’ve cone across that theory, and I can see it’s point if for example someone has had multiple traumas - the theory is that one trauma can be processed in a way that they represent the whole of their traumatic experience. I’ve also come across solutions focussed therapy, which is very future...

Honestly? Your T can handle herself. She can take care of her own feelings even when she’s struggling, in a bad place personally or deeply touched by her client - she can handle it. She witnessed your experience of the world first hand and it made her angry - anger sounds like an appropriate...

Yep, totally get this - it’s hard to explain how physically painful therapy can be. I remember my T asking me about a time when I’ve felt vulnerable and physically feeling sick at the thought of talking about it. We’re past that point now and I’m extremely vulnerable with her but extending that...

I don’t know about untangling - my T said given the stuff we’re working on, it may well get worse before it gets better, which hasn’t gladdened my heart at all. And yet I know exactly what she means - I’m picking at stuff I’ve left alone for a very long time and it’s bound to hurt. One of the...

I couldn’t agree more with @Rumors - there’s something about not always hiding everywhere that feels very important. Trying to be authentic. I’m seeing my at this morning and am about as “all in” with her as is possible but it wasn’t like that to begin with. In terms of therapy it meant me...

This is something I’ve massively struggled with, and still do. I guess I don’t think of vulnerability in the sense of being helpless in the way @Friday fesribed it, vulnerability for me means letting me and my needs, feelings and thought be known to someone else who I fear might judge me or...

There are things you can do to help you while you work out what to do about therapy. If you post about the things that are causing you difficulties just now there’s lots of wisdom on these boards that will really help you to cope. Or have a read around some of the boards that deal with...