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Yes, how about the promise of a trip to Mexico and an engagement upon his return from deployment , he, the person that told me that, never returned...also....looking back, there were so many promises he made that were never realized.

Christine12, I may not say what you want to hear but when I read your posts, I feel I'm looking into a mirror. I know what you are feeling. Stop and pause....Read more about PTSD. Your boyfriend is telling you he doesn't want to hurt you and feels extreme pressure in dealing with his feelings...

Here4him, He had oct birthday too and it came and went and I did NOT contact him.I have more to post to everyone . When I can collect myself I will let you all know of a major update. Not a happy stor stay tuned

There is nothing too big for God to handle...nothing. Don't lose faith ever.

You are preaching to the choir Here4Him....I don't even have to post because you said it all. Be well. Don't wait. I have started seeing a grief/loss therapist and it helps. I do sometimes get anxiety about the fact that...is this ptsd or is it me? Seeing all of the post with so many in common...

Here4him, I too was blocked and added to the ignore list on the yahoo instant message. I also believe he blocked may have even blocked my email as well, as during his deployments I sent several with no response. I will not call or text him at all out of fear that he changed his number or blocked...

Thank you so much 99Phoenix99, thank you so much. That is healing and its validating when I tend to blame myself.

Hi LoyaltoJesus, If I had only seen these educational threads a year ago...I would have seen things so much more clearly. The above threads are sooo helpful and will help many of those who still have a chance to help. My sufferer swept PTSD under the rug and denied having it, and I followed...

I love that song Teardrop

Matthios, I often wonder if I will ever love again too. I have to keep looking up and trust that God's rejection is Gods protection. God knows better than all of us why what how all of this happened. I know we keep looking back at the pain, but keep looking up and I have to remind myself...

We're in this together!

Let him go....but he took my heart....and he hasn't given it back yet. I'm sorry you have been abandoned Matthios...we are all deserving of support. Sufferers suffer and Supporters suffer. We all need healing.

Ditto! I'm there , totally going through what you are going through. I have no answers and have tried and tried to figure it out. I'm seeing a Grief/Loss therapist. I know that no one can say or do anything to make the questions or bewilderment go away. We did nothing wrong and he could paint...

Hello, I'm dealing with the aftermath of what Christine12 is going into. I was convinced that my man was "THE ONE", he convinced me I was the only woman he ever loved and wanted me by his side always. As of 5 months ago....I'm left reading the cards, old emails, looking at pictures over and...

Firefighterwife, I can relate to the feeling of what you are feeling. When our men change and WE as the person who is closest to them and know them best....actually know something is not right with them, that they are depressed, traumatized, stressed...they tend to blame us as their scapegoat...

HelloMo80, Hi, thank you for your empathy. There's nothing like hearing from someone that has been through it. I remember your posts from June when my boyfriend had deployed and I was lost in what was happening. Thank you for relating to me and also I hope that as time went forward for you, that...

Thanks for the vote of confidence discarded.

Thank you 99Phoenix99, After not hearing from my exboyfriend for 5 months...I would like to hear, feel, and see: His smile His embrace- 5 months no hugs -his arms are all that can heal right now His realization- that the accusations of me cheating on him were completely false His friendship His...

Christine12, I can hear your excitement and fresh attitude about your new relationship. You're innocent right now and feel up to the challenge. Just looking back at when I was new with my exboyfriend....I was not informed of what was to come. Once the boom lowered on me...I went into shock...

A random act of kindness will be blessed. You are helping him in spirit. It will not go unnoticed . Make sure you are balancing your work for his happiness with some giving back to yourself.

Im lost too.. I have so many things to respond on your post but I'm really down today. I've been waiting 3 months. You have to wait as long as your heart tells you to. I know the real meaning of that limbo feeling. Why date? Are other men going to fill the void. Love is love your heart is with...

Dear Here4Him, I know your feeling of loss. How do you become someone's friend when you are in love with them. Isn't love strange how we continue to love and endure, the most painful things. Feelings of rejection (its not you but it still feels like rejection). I think your understanding for him...

Thank you CT, For taking the time to lend a sympathetic ear and advice. He's in transit home now. He will be landing in 2 days and I only know this from other sources. He has not contacted me to tell me. Usually we would be so excited about meeting at the airport and running to each others arms...

I have been through this. I'm still going through it and it is really hard. I have regular anxiety attacks everyday at about noon. I've been so dedicated to my boyfriend and he has cut off all communication with me. He has told me unbearably hurtful things, this last time it was so bad that he...

Hi There, I love your analogy about the train, that is so true....I've been where you are. The word "trigger" being a trigger and then we feel that we are the constant "trigger". I'm at a point right now...of not blaming myself, I did do that for a long time before becoming more educated and...