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Dear Abandon, The double standard and the lack of empathy is typical....unfortunately it feels so personal. It feels like we are under attack.. Sometimes it hard not to buy into their on reality. When my partner started to yell at me unprovoked and was uncontrollable.. I really felt that it...

Unfortunately, that's true, things don't get better over time...without therapy.. I get frustrated when people say or think that love can cure everything.. Or that he should get over it.. Mine got worse, actually when we met he was fine (was seeing a therapist at the time, that some how...

Unfortunately it is a very common situation that people with unresolved anger issues hurt the people that cares for them the most.its a mechanisms that I don't understand, but I had a very similar experience with my long term partner (who suffered repeatedchiald abuse) we were togheter 20 years...

Thanks for the clarification, I read the " body keeps the score", and i didn't think that the fight response is a desirable response ...to have in everyday life.. However, a therapist that I saw initially was surprised that I didn't fight back when my ex partner that suffers cPTSD nacame...

Thanks for this post but even the terapist told me that, my partner of 20years will call me every day at 5 to know when I was coming back home from work, wouldn't go anywhere without me..and then he was retraumatized by his family and he isolated himself and us and them he started yelling me...

This way of thinking reminds me very much of my Ex (I came in this forum as a supporter my ex husband has cptsd). You are overanalyzing how other people make friends and you noticed that other people hear more popular and make more friends.. My ex was always complaining that he didn't know how...

My cPTSD husban of 20 years started to be syntomatic a year or so ago, and just yelled me get the f**** out of the house or was silent for 6 months, then asked me to sig e the house back to him for 10 dollars, see my previous posts...finally I moved out ..because despite me giving space and not...

How do I heal? After 10 days of me moving out of our house he finally agreed with the lawyer for giving me a monetary compensation in exchange of me signing the house him. I had to make the offer, it a generous offer, but it better than nothing (he asked me to sign for 10 dollars). It it...

The lawyer called that he finally agreed to my very generous offer!! I want to tell him that hope that one day he can tell to his father how much he was hurt by his abuse (instead of going nuts with me). I hope that he can find the strength to break free from his family (and their abusive way)...

It breaks my heart but I am moving out. Apparently, he still wants me to move out ,but then he keeps delaying coming to an agreement about buying me out of the house. One day he told me that he was fine with my final offer. I told him I don't want to pay too much in legal fees and he counter...

It is considered abuse even in families were spanking is used for correcting certain behavior. I wouldn't say countries, every family is different. My father was never spanked, neither his parents but my mother was. My partner of 20 years soon to be ex was abused just like you, similar...

I am happy that you are finally on the right path and are finding some healing from your trauma. I think that my partner all these years also tr ui ed to get the approval from his father ...and also let his father and what happened to him control his life..he never wanted to have kids due his...

During the sad moments I go back and forth unfortunately....feeling that I could have done something..rescued him when is was there connecting with me...on all levels.. But then I am trying hard to stick what the rational part of my brain is telling me... Thanks, The input I received her has...

He has been projecting..telling me that I was selfish, crazy, depressed, and self centered .initially I didn't know what was going on. I didn't understand Why all the sudden he was behaving like his father minus the physical abuse, he never touched me ( he hates his father) .one day my partner...

Thanks, I don't know why I doubt my judgement so much, It is like I lost common sense I feel guilty about his situation despite I was not my fault. He was seeing a therapist when we met , but he stopped after he changed health insurance. Thanks, You are spot on. He wants solitude and...

We own the house together, you are right about needing a financial planner for life ..I made very poor decisions in my life. I am not independently wealthy, but I am grateful that I am mentally healthy so far. But I haven't really protected my financial interests, I always relied on the fact...

My long time partner of 20 years is in full trauma reenactment..first tried to kick me out of my house, than he didn't talk to me for 8 months..finally talked to me again to finally "explain " that he couldn't regulate his emotions and that he was so mad with me..for always leaving him alone and...

Good for you!! if they cannot ask for forgiveness, they don't deserve to have you in their life. I don't understand my ex- partner , kept reaching out to them just get hurt over and over again..

Thanks Susan for sharing your story, you have a lot of awareness and I think you're great. Your story made very sad, because it made think of my partner (now practically ex) of 20 years that also suffered child abuse by his father starting as an infant (actually starting when his mother was...

He was finally able to talk to me after 8 months, he said that his initial reaction with the "get the f***of the house, ****b**I hate you, was due to him being upset with me for not going with him to visit his uncle inCA, the thing is that he never asked me..but he assumed I would say no and...

Thanks a lot, it helps..

Thanks, like when he wanted to tell me that he wasn't happy with me because he tought I was selfish and not caring for him (had to visit my sister)... .he started yellingI ate you , you are a selfish b****, ..get the f******out... He never used to be like that during the normal years, quite...

What's emotional deregulation? thanks

He used to shut down in school when triggered teen age years ( abusive father comparing him with the favorite older brother), he wouldn't talk in class and refuse to do homework (wanted to jump from the roof ) had to be put with a different teacher that didn't know his brother. So, similar now...

Thanks for your valuable explanation, I hope I am doing the right by giving him a lot of space but helping with little things when he lets me. He his very lonely, as he pushed everyone away. I hope he knows the he can trust me.