Search results

Thank you StartingFire. No, they haven't asked to come over, but they would assume, since that's what is the norm. I'm just trying to figure out the right words and the way to say them to keep them away. I appreciate your suggestion.

Your description sounds like a good reason to me. Write it out and read it if you have to, but tell your therapist what's going on and what's bothering you. It doesn't matter if it makes sense or not, it's what you need help with right now, and that is exactly why we go to therapy.

Hello, my brother and his wife are coming to visit from the other side of the country. They mainly want to visit our Mom who is assisted living near me. I do not want them to come to my house or visit with me in my house. I don't want to spend any time with them, but I probably will not be able...

Yep, I've had that happen. I'll wake up and think of something too. EMDR really brings stuff to the surface. This doesn't mean this is real or not. Give yourself some time and be open to it. You are working on intense memories in a different way that your brain is not used to. I was exhausted...

"Right now I'm 50/50 on just leaving the therapy and saying "thanks for everything but I'll be moving on" or alternatively trying to talk it out but I don't really have a clear idea how. I'm also really nervous around a lot of people which doesn't work in my favor because I have difficulty...

I find the same issues with 'everyone.' Most people don't understand and it feels like they never will. That's why I don't tell people about my PTSD and that I go to therapy. People are sympathetic when I say my ex is stalking me and that he was abusive. If I say I have anxiety, depression, I'm...

I can really relate to this. I also have a long history of struggling. I have CPTSD from abuse. My first therapist had trauma training (not EMDR). I did "talk therapy" with him for quite a while and he even mentioned EMDR and asked if I was interested in finding someone who did that. Eventually...

I've been doing EMDR for abuse that spanned 25 years. My therapist and I figured out to just take one room at a time in the house I lived with him to process. I was very skeptical, but kept an open mind. I didn't think I would see any big results. I was able to see significant results with the...

"I just don’t know what happened or what I did wrong, I always thought that being honest was the best way to fix this things" Yes!! In therapy you (normally) don't need to worry about doing anything wrong. Therapy is for you, and about you, and your therapist is there to support and guide you...

Yes, therapists sometimes cry during sessions, but they need to pull themselves together before their next client. They are human, but they also owe you their complete attention. If they are still emotional and struggling not to cry after their previous client, then they are not ready to help...

I have a lot of nightmares. I've had them for years. I try to make my sleep environment as helpful as I can. I sleep with a light on so when I do wake I can orientate myself more quickly to where I am and know I am safe and it was just a dream. I lock and block my bedroom door with a metal post...

Hi, this is so insensitive and sounds like they didn't completely read your email. I'm a supervisor at work and just high enough on the food chain to hear some of the stupidity that upper management spews. I've heard some pretty stupid things, but most of all it's pretty common for someone to...

I feel the same way about open windows, so unsafe, so scary for me. I've found what helps is to only open them a little bit, not enough for anyone to get in and then use one of those metal clamps designed to keep the window from sliding. If you get one of those with a bar on it, it keeps the...

Hi, I can relate as I never feel safe. I've been out and escaped my abuser 10 years ago. I first lived in an apartment on the second floor. That helped, but I didn't feel safe. I now live in a 2 story condo. My bedroom is upstairs. That helps, but I still don't feel safe. I've discovered that it...

EMDR takes some time to set up. You should never jump right into it, and if a therapist wants to do that, you should walk out that door and never go back. You have to lay the ground work first... Creating a safe space and practicing going there and using breathing to calm yourself. Creating a...

Hi, yes, I can finally say that I have one single memory that when I now think about it, it no longer bothers me! I've been doing EMDR and a week ago we finally finished this memory and it is so strange to be able to say that it no longer "bothers me" to think about it. I have many years of...

Hi and welcome. Yes, many of us have a hard time at Christmas and other holidays. I hate this time of the year. I struggle a lot as well. I'm sorry you're going through all of this. It sounds like you have a wonderful family with you and your son. I know you want the rest of your family to be...

you always remember random obsolete words BGDDYO

Thank you! EMDR was suggested to me over a year ago and I'm just now ready to start. I went through 2 therapists before I found the right one to help me. Looking back I can see that waiting until I was ready was only part of it. Finding the right therapist is vital and ultimately determines if...

I've started EMDR. We did a little bit on some more recent, "easier" memories to start out. Now we are doing the prep work for the intense memories to get ready to process them with EMDR. Last week was pretty rough and I was brave enough- and felt comfortable enough with my therapist to say, "I...

Hi and welcome! It probably means to feel and express your feelings, but it's best to ask for clarification from your therapist. It's always ok to say to your therapist that you don't understand what they just said or asked. I do it. I'll say, "What do you mean by that?"

I'm so happy for you that you've found a therapist that is a good fit for you.

A therapist should never be shocked by your story. Gasping and expressing horror is unacceptable and damaging to the client. It's one thing to agree with you about the horror of what you've been through, and another thing to react negatively. If that ever happens, please talk to your therapist...

Hi, I can really relate to what you're going through. I buried most of the bad memories as well. I remember when I was living with my abuser and after something bad happened I would say to myself over and over, "It doesn't mater. Don't think about it. It didn't happen." I would keep saying it...

I always use deep breathing to help me. I also have a "safe place" that my therapist helped me with because we started EMDR. One thing my therapist said that has helped is there's a difference between "I feel safe" and "I am safe." When the neighbors slam the door (one of my big triggers) I...