• We are a multilingual website again. Read the notice about this.
  • Understand AI use at MyPTSD: all AI use is explained in our AI help page. AI use is by choice here. It exists if you want it, but does nothing unless you choose to use it.

Search results

  1. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    I dunno, I think they still look undercooked
  2. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    not sure how im going to pay my mom's bills. pretty sure I can't use her money from disability or ssi even though she got it on the 3rd, and died on the 4th. was gonna say something else but I forgot 🤔
  3. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    It's just quiet. Very very quiet. Can't shake the feeling that I never stopped having a breakdown. My boss triggered me so badly in 2022, and stuff leading up to that was so spirit crushing, I just haven't had anything left. I have had undercooked little caesar's in the oven for two hours...
  4. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    It is portrayed that way a lot, but I think a big reason for it isn't brainwashing as much as culture. The current modern world needs evidence to trust things. I have a scientist background. so. I just didn't see evidence that was unshakable before then, i guess. I wish they had had security...
  5. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    I haven't been able to cook a single meal since my mom passed away. I thought it was because I don't like my mom's kitchen (which makes me sad because she always hated how small that kitchen was and how it has no storage space and sucks and then my dad ruined whatever positives it DID once...
  6. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Thank you ❤️ Her house feels so empty without her. It was nice seeing her friends and family at the celebration of life service. She is dearly loved I got COVID from the social gathering, so I have lots of time to rest because after I found out, I stopped visiting the family from out of...
  7. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Feeling more at peace at the moment
  8. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    It was very difficult watching her do the breathing gasps of a dying person. I slept on a sleeping bag on the floor of the hospital that night. She made it to morning but she had stopped gasping. I knew it was over the night before, though, and I know that that type of breathing isn't painful or...
  9. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Got my chores done 👍 ✅
  10. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Is life supposed to feel like one disaster after another ETA: just feeling like a massive failure and I miss my mom very very much
  11. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    How do you go from someone being more than half your world to just. Gone
  12. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Her house is still a mess. I should have worked harder on it
  13. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Can't shake the feeling that I could have prevented this and that I wasn't kind enough and didn't do enough
  14. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Lion passed away even younger. You can just find it to be your time at any age. Children death is the worst but yeah, any age. Life is an interesting experience
  15. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    I'm just so worried that her death would have been prevented if id paid better attention. This is also how my aunt felt when her wife passed away. I imagine it's common even without the presence of OCD making it worse. Just trying to remember that my mom deserved the independence she wanted and...
  16. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    My OCD is bothering me significantly. Just getting through the days, though
  17. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Thank you so much ❤️ 🫂 🫂 🫂 🫂
  18. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    I'm glad it was so peaceful
  19. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    My OCD + chronic guilt really really wants me to use anxiety/survival instincts to find what I did wrong that lead to my mom's death. I would live in a thousand times the filth to have her back :(
  20. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Thank you for the support, it means a lot
  21. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Thank you This is the worst pain I've ever felt. I miss her so much Every 10 minutes feels like a decade
  22. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    Thank you I am so glad I always took all my anger out here and not with her. I was so afraid of hurting her that even saying angry things here bothered me, but she never knew about them and hopefully won't find out (do angels get wifi?)
  23. littleoc

    Colorful and hopefully optimistic but maybe hateful occasionally

    I would stay in an uncomfortable place forever to have her back. But I am at least happy she is at peace. And I hope she knows I love her so much and that she meant the world to me
Back
Top Bottom