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I am feeling the worst fear right now. I could barely type from shaking. I tried to workout but that didnt help. I get to this place of fear that is paralyzing and all i can do is to hide in a dark room on the floor curled up. I have for so long just wanted to feel safe. I never felt safe as...

I have a long story of abuse/trauma. Right now though one of my traumas is fighting for first place. It happened in a hospital when I was just 16. Very painful and traumatic. I don't want to get into what happened but I was screaming in pain and begging them to stop. The doctor and nurses made...

Please help guys. I am so triggered right now. So scared and im just so upset because i was doing so good the last few days. I just started wellbutrin like 4 days ago and ive never taken any meds before. I happened to start taking the welbutrin at a point when I wasn't triggered, as in I...

This was my 3rd day. I have never taken meds in my life. So far my worst side effect is everytime i try to relax or go to bed i have an urge to move my feet. Grind them into the bed, put shoes on (tight shoes), run around, jump up and down, crack my toe knuckles for the 100th time in the past 5...

Is it normal for me to feel like i have all of the above? Im scared i do. I have been diagnosed with ptsd and no doubt have had a big dose of trauma since early childhood and in adulthood. But i have always been emotional and sensitive, had a lot of anger and even at 6 years old i self harmed...

Ive never been on meds but i cant function anymore. So i just got a prescription for wellbutrin. Anyone had experience with it? Good or bad? I know we are all different so i wont know until i try it. I guess im just anxious.

Today again for the second time (that im aware of) derealization, at least i think. And everything feels weird. Im sooo sick of this. Does anyone have this?

I just slipped back into the dark. All of a sudden. I had been doing better keeping ny mind off things..not cured though, thats for sure. I took my little one out by myself for the first time in a loooong time. It was high stress to say the least but u tried to push myself But today im a mess...

And feeling like a failure.. And im gaining weight.. And thats making me feel worse. Im so tired of feeling like dog #%@` with no hope for the future. I really hope my new T can help. I use to be generally happy and hopeful. Is there hope for me? Has anyone got better with meds?

Ive been trying to just forget everything. But i made small steps. I took my little one outside. By myself. That is huge. I cant say i was comfortable because i wasn't. I was on edge the whole time. I also made an appointment with a T. I finally picked one. Even though he is a male and i might...

As in tremble and have goose bumps. Almost like a fever. Anyone else? To go to see T i have to bundle up. Jacket, gloves, boots, scarf. Last time i told my supporter i was bringing my blanket in my purse. He said please dont lol Severe anxiety also can make me freeze like as in frozen and cant move

Just wondering if there are any survivors that cant stand to hear their name.. I changed mine which is easy for anyone new i meet. But old family and friends are hard...they call me old name and if i send them a card i cant sign old name or new one...when i hear my old name i cringe...

Or like yourself? Or have compassion for yourself? Does it get easier to do? Have any of you overcome this?

Quick question for anyone who can help... Since i can remember i have been dealing with self hate. I self harmed at a young age and wanted to die.. Today i still struggle with this. Very low self esteem. Body image issues. Not good enough, i feel so different and ugly. Inside and out. Im in a...

Please let me know if this happens to you... This has happened to me maybe 10 times since working through trauma. Its happened in the bath, on a hike, in my garage... It is the HARDEST of all my ptsd symptoms to explain. I have these one flashbacks that are so easy to explain..im 5 yrs old...

I just recently had a really weird experience where it was like i came out of a fog and everything looked and felt different. Kind of scary and strange. I felt so sad, like wow this is my life?im really here?just so weird and aware. Now rewind to one day when i was 5 years old. I was sitting at...

I just remember at 5 looking down at my arm while i was eating cereal at the kitchen table. I saw my arm, moved it and either thought or said "im real" its happened before but not quiet like that. My abuse started before 5 and lasted...i couldn't tell you... Anyone have this happen?

About 6 months ago i had the WORST nightmare of my life. So real, so frightening. I woke up screaming. I was hoping that particular nightmare was a one time thing.. Last night i got the same one..its devestating and im wondering if its memories trying to push through... So i just fell asleep at...

Im not sure where to post this...just wondering what im feeling when i see people doing well. Successful, normal, pretty. Shiny happy people...it just like hits me hard..like wow just makes me feel like so broken and defective and hopeless. What is this im feeling? Part of my ptsd? Or something...

Last night was typical...im the last one up..restless, tossing and turning...trying to watch tv to distract myself from thoughts and memories. Of course there is a major migraine to top things of. Floods of memories and i start crying for what was lost. I feel helpless, pathetic and im about to...

Ok this has happened a few times. Please let me know if it's happened to you or what you think it is. At the beach with my partner and our small child. My child lets go of my hand and runs alongside my partner...I say hold hands...but they don't and continue to run and play free...I say it a...

Even hard to go in my own backyard... I'm having a hard time finding a new therapist. How do you choose? I'm so uncomfortable and stressed with everyone I have had a consult with, but I need help ASAP. I'm having flashbacks and disassociating when I meet with them, I can barely get my words...