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Yes!

I've been off this site for a month overwhelmed with anger, sadness, denial, disinterest... I received the weekly email saying I'd been inactive and it brought me in on today. Oddly enough, the emotion I'm feeling strongest is alone. I've lost my closest friends/support systems due to my trauma...

I'm not very keen on the word normal. I removed it from my vocabulary 20 years ago. However, I have been pretending to be OK and happy my entire life (sometimes I buried my pain so deep I did feel happy, even though deep deep deep down inside my heart felt bruised) . I learned to do it at a very...

Whoa, you just blew my mind!!! I would have gone my whole life unaware of this had you not stated it.

I haven't had a chance to read all of the replies yet (I do plan to so I can send a more detailed message) but I wanted you to know that I feel like I'm reading about myself. Your mother and my mother may be soul sisters. I'm soooo deprived of touch I actually dreamed I was yelling, "why didn't...

WTF? She doesn't speak for me and by saying "NO ONE" it makes it sound as those she lumps everyone into this (her) belief system. No two patients are alike. Her inability to treat your individual needs (not every patient is a carbon copy) is upsetting and semmingly dismissive. And if I could...

I'm proud of you. A good therapist is willing to listen to concerns and make changes where need. Sounds like your T falls into the good therapist category. Usually when I arrive I sit down and have a, "how's it going?" few minutes. And sometimes I tell my T, "You have to lead and ask questions...

@Sandstone Proud. I'm just so damn proud of you!

@Copper Princess I was in bed today all day. Some days I get up and moving and some days i'm in bed all day. Check in with us on this forum when you're having a good day, a bad day, or just need to vent. Someone is always here. You'll find care and supported. I bought one of the flashlights...

This is the same for me. I take it as a good considering the alternative.

@katz As a child I used to float up to the ceiling off to the corner or above where I was in a dissociative state. To the best of my knowledge I've only dissociated as an adult once due to extreme stress but I was safe and able to speak with my T during the episode. It's not okay that you...

I know what impacts *MY* treatment but I appreciate your viewpoint.

Yeah...:sorry: And I so wanted/needed (still need) that because I didn't get it as a child :cry: Thank you @Ragdoll Circus

I've had money (what was considered plain old middle class by the 80s definition) and not had money (working poor living paycheck to paycheck but able to meet my shelter, food, etc. needs, just no spare cash) both as an adult and a child. For me personally my gender, age, and race* have had a...

This. All of this. Yes, yes, yes, yes. I waited so long to read this post because I knew it would rattle me in unimaginable ways but thank you @garden for posting this. I didn't want to acknowledge this it but I need to. Hugs if you can accept them.

I've wonder/questioned/doubted it was possible for an adult to be groomed. I feel like I was with my whole being but how can an adult not know it's happening. Am I that stupid? Mind you it took years on his part but he was soooo successful at it. And... I loved him. <----- that is the hardest...

This. I know it but I've never put it into words.

"Stop/don't" is not a tool for everyone. For me it's like a heroin addict, for example. If addicts just stopped getting high or didn't think about it then things get better and they can stop. Overly simplistic? Yes. Using this addict example sometimes cold-turkey works. Please mind my comment...

Ha! As your dentist if they have sample electronic teeth brushes

And just an FYI, I got an electric toothbrush yesterday!

Thanks for the reminder to practice selfless kindness.

Run:eek:

That I'm not alone in this journey. And just this week I learned to sit with my pain and anger. And to allow myself to push back when push on. But mostly, that I'm not alone and the importance of letting others know they aren't either.

This. Just (sigh)... Damn I wish I knew this before I repeatedly ripped open my chest to offer my heart to others. I saw/gave it as proof of my love, sincerity and devotion. As an explanation. They saw a desperate smiling girl with a gaping hole in her chest holding her "crazy" in an...

Also, I'm grateful that if I don't take care of myself I can start over tomorrow. Maybe you can apply that to yourself...? :oops: