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So. I've wonder for years if I'm asexual. I had a rape trauma when I was 15 So I've never enjoyed sex. I realize this part trauma but what is asexual I'm kind of okay with no sex But either way if it's trauma how in the world would I reverse it? I self help.. I'm not going to a...

God. It's already been 7months? ......where the f*ck have I been. I can't lie. That just breaks my soul and makes me bawl. I have lost so much of my life because of my ex. A total of 4 years .... What the f*ck is this life. This is not a life.

Trauma When I was 15 - Ivebeen dissociating periodically since then. And a previous trauma. 7months ago. New everything - New house new job new friends new city. Last trauma was an abusive relationship I was isolated for 3.5 years from all my friends. So. A lots going on. This isn't normal.

You guys are fantastic. I'll reply tomorrow. I'm kind of in and out of dissociation right now. This is too much right now unfortunately. Be peaceful. Thank you all so much.

I had found, despite the topic, a conversation extending more than 30 minuets or so tends to make me dissociate. Would anyone know why perhaps?

. Now that I relate to

Thank you.

My god I just don't know. My heads just screaming at me. I just want to die. I didn't ask to be here. And im suffering.

What is your head like now?

I'm just tired of hoping and suffering and. Hanging on and it doesn't get better it really doesn't. It hasn't in 11 years... I. Just going off facts.

Staying present makes me want to break things.

What is this nonsense? Do others have daily constant thoughts too? Suicidal thoughts aren't normal... I recently realized that. (That was an ephiphany for me.. What is it like to not think of suicide? How do they feel normally? Weird shit.) Anyways. I've always struggled with it. About 11...

How do you get control over it? I usually have to sleep it off to come out if it

I think he is blessed with you. I don't know anyone that has a heart for that. And how do you even tell someone that? I barely know what the hell is wrong with me.

Thank you never more. I just don't undertand .. Why would I disossociate? Is it just my "fight or flight" response?

On a side note, Due to stress and this nonsense and life I'm having a really hard time eating. My stomach is always in knots, I regularly feel nauseous (no, I'm not pregnant). I ate 3 chicken nuggets today and took 2 bites off a lunch meat sandwhich. It's all I can do not to puke. Any...

Me again. So. I got out of relationship 3 months ago of 3.5 years and although undiagnosed, I believe I'm suffering from PTSD because if that relationship. I was not raped, however. With that being said, I am aware I am not ready for a relationship. I have also found I am having a really hard...

I hope you find peace, junebug

And thank you as well... It is comforting knowing I'm not the only one. You certainly feel like it. My loved ones are the only reason too. My mom. My dad. I wonder why we are like this?

Thank you, love. :) I really appreciate that.

@Justmehere Thank you so much. Online counseling? I felt a little bit of happiness and hope. I'll hope to try that out soon And. I was isolated from all my friends - I didn't talk to anyone outside my family for 3.5 years. and although I saw my family it was under his time and not as often as I...

@Stickler I read the article The last paragraph is me. But I don't quite grasp the rest. do you have another source

I wish there was online counseling. It's anxiety to drive, to make an appointment, to keep an appointment. Then how I feel when I get there - god, I cry the entire time. Smh. And .. I know abusive is bad. I just want to try to help myself first, understand this. I know I can't go...

I won't lie, I always stop going. Therapys hard for me. But either way.... Why am I feeling this way?

Hey guys. I'm not really sure how to start this. I'm not diagnosed with PTSD, but I have enough issues I need advice. So. Blah blah, I got out of a really bad relationship. Abusive mentally and although he never hit me, I had many bruises from being grabbed and I've been thrown. There...