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@Rain - Thank you.

Death is not a topic people experience. I mean ya a family member or a close friend... But murder... It only happens in movies or military... I have seen 28 people die in my life... Witnessed it. Its something hard for people to underatand and will be unless the world goes to days like Mad Max lol

I was tested after the swelling in my brain went away. But i think it was a study for sociopaths. They monitored a lot of my brain activity over the course of a month. But i dont think i was tested to see if my injurys play a part mentally. As far as the human trafficking thing. Im good for me...

Welcome! I wish I had advice to give but im still learning tools myself lol. Ive been here for about 24 hrs and people have been very helpful. I hope someone can give you the advice you are seeking. Be well.

Thanks. Ya i have about 20+ anger management completion certificates somewhere from court ordered classes. One as recently as 3 months ago. Ive tried inpatient treatment but made me feel like I was back in prison but worse because the other people there were more unpredictable. Honestly I never...

Being open and honest has never been an issue lol. A lot of the time most people dont like to hear what I have to say. But there are a lot of things ill never be able to talk about to anyone. Because it will close a door where ill never be able to get out. I was sexually assualted though by a...

Oh no im good now on drinking... I started drinking at 12 and smoking pot i think around 13 or 14... I quit drinking Nov. 11 2016. I was on some heavy drugs until prision so Feb 2008 was the last time I used any drugs... But ya been sober almost a year now... Never really think about it unless...

I dont think so. To be honest I dont know what that is lol.

I have learned a few deep breathing exercises from my therapists but they have never seemed to work. When they were doing tests on brain activities and things like that. Like how my endorphins are released to certain videos, pictures, or when making me angry. They tried to teaching me breathing...

Ya ive been looking through some of the posts. Its kinda hard to read a lot of them... Even through all of my violence I have never laid a hand on a women... And I start feeling so angry reading some of the stuff here to where I grit my teeth. But I want to change I do but I also want to know...

None of that has worked. I use to drink a lot and that worked great but the violence that came with it became a real problem. As soon as I doze off its like I wake up in a jolt panicking. I scan the room for what could of scared me awake but there is never anything there. When I started on...

Thank you.

Im not any more no. My last therapist moved away about 4 months ago. He was my 5th one. Now im on a waiting list. I think i have another 8 or 9 months before one will be available.

So, how do you all fall asleep? I cant. I literally cant. I fear that I may not wake up or theres like a load screaming in my head that wont stop. In prison when I wanted to sleep I got in a fight or slapped a gaurd to go to the hole so I could be alone. But being out in the real world I dont...

I have been diagnosed with PTSD, bipolar, and a sociopath. When saying I feel alive is what I mean lol. When Im not in full rage mode i feel dead empty. I wear a great mask in public. Shoot a grin here and there laugh at a stupid joke I dont understand but everyone around me feels like an enemy...

Well... I dont know where to start really... About a year ago my family talked ne into getting some help... My life has been rough from about 4 years old and still messed up and I turn 30 next month. My mother abandoned me in Denver, CO when I was 9 years old. I learned everything I know on the...