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    Feeling selfish for self-care

    Well I'm glad it meant something, and that you've gotten better at not beating yourself up. :) It's not really any particular person. I just grew up being taught that the way I am, the way I act is wrong. And this was beaten into me both physically, and mentally. So , subconsciously, I still...
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    Stood my ground

    Congrats on standing your ground. :) Even if you don't feel comfortable doing that with those close to you right now, you're still making progress, and working on getting to the point where eventually you'll feel more ok with confrontation.
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    Feeling selfish for self-care

    @Link Removed Yes, that sort of people pleasing is a bit different from mine. Though I know quite a few people who suffer from it. My mother especially needs validation from others, and it's caused a lot of bitterness, and resentment. She's angry about not being appreciated, but still goes out...
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    Feeling selfish for self-care

    Yeah, a lot of it is tied into issues with self-esteem, and self-hatred. I often feel bad when a friend or loved one wants to do something, and I am just not up for it. I'll usually push through it (up to the point where my body/mind is literally not capable of doing the activity). But that...
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    Feeling selfish for self-care

    A recent session with my T made me realize just how much people pleasing I do. I always knew it, but it didn't really sink in until she pointed out all the ways I warp myself just to make others feel comfortable. It's become second nature to me. Almost every action I take comes with thoughts of...
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    Finding flaws in therapy again

    Coming across bad therapists is unfortunately very common. So many people who get into the mental health profession, either do it for the wrong reasons, or become burnt out and don't realize it. It sucks that finding a good therapist can be such a struggle. I've found that it's important to be...
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    Feeling selfish for self-care

    @MyWillow Ouch. I hope you've healed after all that. At least you now have a cool scar on your hand :p I get it though. Some days I come into work in such pain and exhaustion, it's all I can do not to pass out. Really not healthy. And then the rare day when I really, really cannot make it in...
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    Feeling selfish for self-care

    Just wondering how many people here feel selfish for taking care of themselves. I often feel like I'm letting people down when I put my needs before theirs. Even when I'm on the brink of complete mental shutdown, I feel selfish for putting myself first. And I'm not even talking about big...
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    Your Day In Emoticons

    Need :sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep::sleep: :dead:
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    You Know You Have PTSD When...

    See that's where you went wrong. You shouldn't have opened it at all. Instead, you just stand there wondering who it could be, why they didn't call ahead, and if they happen to be a knife wielding maniac. And then they give up and go away. Problem solved. :D
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    What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

    So so so so so so tired. I have to get through another 5 hours of work. Then another 3 days. Then the weekend is going to be busy and stressful. So I won't be able to really rest for another 10 days. I think I might just drive into a wall on the way home (j/k). :bawling::dead:
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    Your Day In Emoticons

    :sleep::sleep::sleep::hungover::hungover::hungover::dead::dead::dead:
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    Death My "baby" sister is dying...

    I am so very sorry you, and your sister have to go through this. I haven't been here very long, and I know I'm only a stranger, but if you ever need to talk or rant, let me know. :hug:
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    Last movie or tv series you watched?

    Aw crap, didn't need the "s". Can't edit the above, so sorry to anyone who read it and had the show ruing :(
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    Last movie or tv series you watched?

    Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. Great series, and deals with multiple topics in very open-minded, compassionate ways. I'm on Season 3, andhe last few episodes I've watched ... ...triggered me quite a bit. Rebecca's downward spiral. Her suicide attempt. They were all very difficult to watch. I actually...
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    Staying alive out of guilt?

    Yeah, I used to think about that a lot. I'd do math in my head on how much pain my death it would cause others. I thought of all the ways I could kill myself without it looking like suicide. My death would hurt, but not as much as if I had caused it. At least if my death looked like an accident...
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    Your Day In Emoticons

    Yesterday - :):mad::oops::sorry::banghead::unsure::dpressed::dead::dpressed: - Not a great day. Did a stupid thing, and got stuck in a cycle of self-loathing, and anger.
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    Do You Ever Feel Like Your Trauma Wasn't "traumatic Enough"?

    Yes, I do this all the time. I had a pretty traumatic childhood, but I still think that I'm just overreacting. I can't help comparing myself to others, and then thinking I should stop complaining, they've had it worse. I know logically it's very unhealthy behavior, but I still feel that way. I...
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    What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

    Feeling tired (this is pretty much my default state), and conflicted about a session I had with my T.
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    Gaslighting vs transference vs over-reactivity vs ???

    It sounds like your mother is one of those people who needs attention, who needs other people to see her in the best light. Even if it jeopardizes her relationships with those closest to her. I get how it feels to have people in your life who show two different faces. One to you, and one to the...
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    What can my therapist say/do to provide reassurance/connection?

    Hm, that's a tough one. There's not a whole lot you can do when your heart just isn't ready to trust. You mentioned that your brain trusts this T, so on some level you know that they're good people. That they only want the best for you. And you've made it clear to them that you need a lot of...
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    Gaslighting vs transference vs over-reactivity vs ???

    Hm, trusting your instincts, your perceptions can be difficult. Especially if you've had a lot of experience with people dismissing your interpretation of events. . I think the best thing is to recognize that we're all flawed in our interpretation of events. And that your feelings, and...
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    How Did You Sleep Last Night?

    Badly. The humidity, mixed in with my tinnitus flaring up made for a fairly crap nights sleep. There are some ASR videos on youtube I find very helpful for drifting off. I would link them but this forum is (rightfully) worried about spam. Yeah, I get that. I've found that napping to be very...
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    What is dissociation?

    Some really informative replies here. I know what disassociation, and derealization are, but it's also useful to see some real life examples of it. To be able to examine my own experiences in relation to that of others. I have quite a few dissociative events day to day. A lot of the time it...
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