Actually that is sort of what I fear because I have been blaming myself my whole life, not sure I am a good judge of my own guilt.
Obviously not but I made sure both my children did go to college and understood from when they were young children you go to elementary school, then middle school...
After 6 months of weekly therapy with a really insightful therapist I am trying to come to grips with what I have learned were multiple traumas in my youth. For over 45 years I never told a sole but new inside that I was damaged by abuse of a pedophile from 10-12. I have lived with the self...
Let me start off by saying that I loved both my parents deeply and they loved me as well. This is what is making this process so complicated. With guidance and help from my T I am beginning to understand my childhood was more complicated. My parents had their issues and got divorced when I was...
I have read that EMDR can be very effective. My initial T 5 years ago who had been practicing EMDR for 30 years tried 4 times with me, could not even scratch the surface of the steel wall surrounding my Traumas
Quick follow up. Went to the Dr who confirmed a Laryngospasm. The good news is he said it might never come back but if it does he taught me how to counter it.
What caused this, all part of a neuropathy issue I have that actually my be tied to my PTSD. The journey continues
I have spoken with my T through email and after my medical appt on Tuesday, based on outcome it may be kicked over to my T
One good piece of news I am getting my first vaccine shot next week :-)
I had the strangest thing happen two nights ago, I woke out of a sound sleep and could not breath, literally no inhale and no exhale other than a minor trickle. This went on for 2-3 minutes, my wife was freaking out and trying to clear my throat but there was no obstruction. Slowly over about...
I have now had about 20 weekly sessions with my T. Making progress but still stuck a little on a few things, ok more than a few.
My T tells me all the time that I am viewing and judging my actions at that age through my current adult eyes as opposed to me 10yo self. I blame myself for never...
Yesterday I had my wife join in for my session. I have told my wife only the very basic info about my CSA and having her in the session allowed my T to help me fill in the grey spots. I think this was a very good session as she was able to tell my wife more than I can both clinically and...
Thank you, it is a journey with no clear end. I have invited my wife to join my next session tomorrow. I want my T to help explain my traumas, I am not able to do that yet myself
Discouraging in that you don't like your T or just don't like the additional traumas being raised? If it is the former, change and find someone you like if the latter, stay with it
There is no doubt that therapy has saved me even if it has uncovered additional troubling traumas. I have been lifted out of the depths of debilitating depression and able to function but now I am learning how do deal with additional traumas that I had not considered before. Now my therapy is...