Recent content by David1959

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    After Going Dormant For 2 Years My CPTSD Has Come Roaring Back

    Quick update, I started taking Celexa again last Friday and for 5 days I have been without flash backs or panic attacks
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    After Going Dormant For 2 Years My CPTSD Has Come Roaring Back

    I have been thinking about what the trigger might be and will discuss with my T. I think the trigger might be my current salary negotiations with my employer and my feelings of powerlessness because I do not have a college degree. That fact is the trigger because it goes back to my childhood...
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    After Going Dormant For 2 Years My CPTSD Has Come Roaring Back

    Thank you - I don't know why this came roaring back but I am really debilitated and feel powerless :-(
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    After Going Dormant For 2 Years My CPTSD Has Come Roaring Back

    After about 12 months of weekly therapy I finally arrived at a place where I could make peace with my childhood traumas, at least enough to live my life. When I entered therapy I was severely depressed as my 40+ year secret that I had basically disassociated for my entire life came pouring out...
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    How do you stop being so hard on youself?

    I think recovery is slow and I am not sure I will ever be recovered more just able to better understand and live with it
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    Sufferer Looking for some support from others who understand and can relate to sexual trauma.

    I have found it quite cathartic to write about my feelings and absorb comments of support and understanding from others. Also 100% find a really good therapist that specializes in sexual abuse.
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    What I Have Learned From 8 Months of Therapy

    This weekend I shared this post with my wife, it was hard (not because of her but because of me). She is very supportive as usual but also cry's and grieves over my pain (something I can not do) which is a good thing but it drives me crazy and horrifies me, I need to learn how to deal with that
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    What I Have Learned From 8 Months of Therapy

    Thank you, no doubt it is a journey where there is no picture postcard of the destination. I feel much better knowing that I at least have a chance at some type of recovery Yes I got lucky. I read an article she had written about CSA (her area of specialty) and she was in my city. I reached out...
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    What I Have Learned From 8 Months of Therapy

    First, I have to say that while my therapy has been effective it also has been disturbing, on many levels. It has forced me to examine my childhood and to explore a long series of traumas that unknown to me shaped my life. So based on what I have learned, here are some of the effects and...
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    Tomorrow my T is going to start exploring my father

    I have been in intensive weekly therapy for 9 months. We have made good progress and I have posted here a few times about that. We have touched on my Dad but tomorrow we are going to focus deeply on the subject, I am nervous. What has been uncovered so far is that in addition to my CSA by a...
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    Now that I am facing my childhood trauma's after 50 years how do I move forward

    We do indeed seem to be on a similar path with many of the same demons
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    Now that I am facing my childhood trauma's after 50 years how do I move forward

    That is my hope but honestly not sure I can get there. I have an internal struggle going on between light and dark and I do not know who will win
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    Now that I am facing my childhood trauma's after 50 years how do I move forward

    I still work full time in a job that I like that also keeps my mind busy so I am thinking about everything else
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    Now that I am facing my childhood trauma's after 50 years how do I move forward

    Just as an example, prior to therapy if you had asked me about my childhood I would have said it was normal. If you had asked me about my parents I would have said they were the best, I lived my entire life believing this. Therapy has unlocked the truth that my upbringing was far from normal and...
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