Recent content by tiler

People who care to make a difference

In terms of going too fast, I do just kind of want to get it over with, and although the effects are really hard to deal with….i can technically deal with them. And if it helps me get this trauma processed quicker I’m probably better just pushing through it, rather than prolonging it?

In practicing it as a skill I assume you mean, just talk about it and deal with the consequences and eventually it will bring fewer consequences. Like exposure therapy for the actual flashbacks rather than the trauma? This is hard, in relating it to the panic attacks. I have learned how to...

This is interesting, how would it work in terms of using it in session to help? Do you mean when I talk about the trauma I also talk about what I think should have happened to make it less traumatic?

I will try and do some of these things, thanks. It’s not really possible unless I’m very prepared, but I don’t know when it’s going to happen. Often I’m screaming really hard and uncontrollably . Or sometimes I collapse and all my muscles get heavy and I become paralysed, my body starts...

In terms of the delayed reaction, it’s very much a reenactment which I’m not in control of rather than an emotional thing. The only emotion is terror. My body starts reenacting the trauma. It’s kind of unbelievable what happens and I have very little control of it.

Thanks for your response. Yes, T is aware. T is leading mostly and I much prefer it that way. She does try to ask open ended questions now and then, but I just go into internal panic mode and give an answer I think she wants to hear. It doesn’t work for me at all and she gets the wrong...

My guess is that I’m dissociating while disclosing trauma, but it doesn’t feel like I am while I’m talking, I feel like I’m present. So either I don’t know what it feels like to actually be present, or it’s not that I’m dissociating?

My T wants me to talk about the trauma so that I have narrative. I agree this would potentially be helpful, although I do think I have a narrative in my head already, I just haven’t spoken about it to anyone, so I’m not sure that doing that would be any more helpful. Main issue though is that I...

And the worst thing is when you try to get justice and it doesn’t come because…..people

Can there ever really be justice for the damage caused by PTSD which doesn’t ever leave you, is constantly there, changes you as a person and therefore your entire life course, of which you only have one? I don’t think so, and so is it even worth pursuing, knowing that it will cause further...

During a therapy session I was focusing on an event in the past week where I had felt terror. T had asked me what I believed about myself in that moment. Is this what my core belief would be? Anyway, I told her that it was that ‘I can’t advocate for myself’. But actually it wasn’t that and I...

Thanks everyone. So….I think she is a good therapist and knows what she’s doing…but I don’t know for sure what she’s doing, so I feel out of control. She redirects me when I start to talk about the trauma, she doesn’t want details, so I don’t really know what I’m supposed to be talking about...

The thing is I started the therapy off the back of a really intense psychosis type episode that lasted for a few months of 24/7 hallucinations/real somatic flashbacks. I don’t really understand what happened to me and this is what I want to understand but am too scared to talk about. However, in...

Yes I think that trying to get help is very triggering for me. In terms of the actual help itself, I don’t feel safe within any ‘therapeutic’ relationship. Particularly when they want a connection and want to be compassionate and I don’t want that because it feels threatening to me - I just...