Recent content by UniqueSunflower

Hoarding can come in many forms, even if the environment isn’t containing elements of disgust, putrid odors, etc. Both of my parents struggle with accumulating items they don’t need and the feel compelled to keep. Dad’s an art collector & Mom’s a pile maker with letters, flyers, brochures, and...

Hi Susan, My heart feels for you and reading your story brought tears to my eyes. I am also a survivor of sexual assault. Your situation sounds like you were violated on so many levels and I can completely understand why your foundation for trust has been shattered. Have gone through treatment...

Thank you Ice_Fire. Yes, my contact w/ dad has been primarily by choice. I think part of it is I’ve had so many significant losses throughout my life that I can’t bare to go through one such as that. I know if I completely detached from him, it would have a damaging effect on my relationships w/...

I’ve only been able to disclose my sexual abuse perpetrated by my father to my mother though not my immediate family. Thank goodness she believed me and she’s not violated my trust in sharing. I told her after moving out on my own. She stayed living with my father for several years and...

These characteristics sound all too familiar. My MOST abusive relationship was with the man that sexually assaulted me although I’ve started entering relationships since which have had some of the abusive characteristics noted. Even though I’ve gotten out of them after recognizing red flags...

I have a handful of friends that have continued to be in my life throughout my recovery and I see these people as truly authentic friends for me. One particular friend I’ve known since Junior High (a good 25 years). In looking at the difference between the friends who have stuck around and those...

I get your stating it’s a stressor rather than a trigger. I’m relating it to when you’ve had something happen that is significantly out of your control and you perceive you are being controlled by someone else, it brings back that sense of feeling out of control or dis-empowered in the...

I have several triggers, some of which I’m more aware of than others. I became aware of being triggered today by a friend “telling” me I should do something and I hadn’t had an opportunity to make a decision on my own as to whether I wanted to do it or not. I find when I perceive my decision...

I have also experienced a co-dependent tendency to want to "help" a partner heal when we have been at different stages of recovery. If the relationship feels reciprocal and safe, maybe just see where it goes. I have the tendency to over analyze my interpersonal relationships to the point that...

Could you be experiencing the "numbing" aspects of PTSD, especially when you've been triggered or experienced a negative emotional response activated at high levels - doesn't necessarily mean you're a "sociopath".

Sometimes when we don't reach out is when we need it the most. I commend you for taking the risk. I really appreciate the ability to remain anonimous on such a forum. Continue practicing self care and eventually things do get better. Depression can feel so heavy that even the things that...

I know realistically he may not "choose" to be with me in the end. I also suspect he may have some narcissistic traits which is something I have been drawn to as I've healed. In the end, it will likely not leave me feeling good so all in all, you're right to suggest it's something I shouldn't...

I would agree that fwb's & fb's are one in the same. I already have feelings for this person though I think I'm having difficulty accepting it may not evolve into anything more.

I have reconnected with a man that I dated in my past. It was previously a sexual relationship that he ended after stating he felt overwhelmed and need to take a step back. At the time I was confused and disappointed though after further conversation, we both agreed to continue seeing other...

I feel awful you have and are having to go through this. I can see why you would feel conflicted about how to proceed with no contact. I wonder if just doing it might be better only because certain people want to get involved in a power struggle over the fact that they are treating others...