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It's beautiful walking weather, but my hip really doesn't do cold. I hope I haven't damaged it again. I didn't realise today was Friday, nor that it's now December! I need to find my motivation again. This mood is too close to anhedonia for comfort. I'm worried I'm losing control over my sleep...

I managed to turn around a bad mood this morning by giving myself a break. Decided to watch a whole TV miniseries in one go, instead. State of Play is still a brilliant drama. Can I be bothered to make macaroni cheese for dinner? Why am I getting the urge to look back through family stuff? I'm...

If I read too many trashy romcoms will my head turn to mush? I hate that I can get anxious over an e-mail. That's twice this week. For some reason I keep buying myself sweets. Last night was pretty horrid. Hours awake followed by more nightmares. I miss having an animal for company.

Singing Carol Cats?? I'm bringing a tub of Quality Street.

When I was in that place- sheer stubbornness, and first hand experience of being on the other side as a witness to someone else's desire to die. I couldn't do that to someone else.

First attempt at Christmas shopping- I got one tiny gift and two cards, and a huge bar of fudge for me. Cross eyed tree decorations are a little bit creepy. The look on the face of the litte boy who's grandad plonked the all-singing-and-dancing elf hat on him. I did something I've been...

Just got an apology e-mail from my tutor about her running late. I still don't know where to go tomorrow. I'm thinking a town by the coast so I can hunt for gifts and go watch the sea. Still struggling with the desire to go out. I want to, but it looks so unforgiving outside. Sephen King's books...

A lot of the time when I'm squirming in the chair and not talking to you, I'm not considering the last thing you said. The only thought going through my head is well, this is uncomfortable.

I'm well aware I have a big issue with this. Self-Kindness: 1.60 Self-Judgment: 5.00 Common Humanity: 1.25 Isolation: 4.50 Mindfulness: 2.00 Over-Identification: 3.75 Overall score: 1.60

I should have gone out today. Staying in has made me twitchy. Tomorrow, then. The problem is I don't know what I want. Not right now, or ever. I wish I was brave enough to go to a house viewing.

I like my T's drive. It passed two fields containing sheep from a nearby farm, and rare breed goats. In summer starlings dive out of the hedges in front of my car, and T's neighbour's cat sits on the drive like she owns it.

Work audit passed with 100%. For a moment I felt like I was back in school. Made a last minute plan to do late night shopping with a friend next week. Write more sonnets! (I never thought I'd be saying that). I want my tutor to send back my last assignment already. Do 'normals' really value...

The rain came early, and misted up my glasses on my walk home. My boss spent the whole day having to resist the urge to ask me to work tomorrow. He knew he owed me a favour. I don't know if I feel hungry or not. I couldn't finish my dinner. I should probably eat something, but then I might not...

It seems I'm in for another stretch of weird and violent dreams. And it started off with a good one, too. Only four more shifts until I have a week off. The freezer is so full of pizza I can't get anything in it. Sometimes, all the conversations on this site seem to be poking at one of my...

It's a line from a song in Disney's Beauty and the Beast. I don't know the name of the song, but it's Gaston singing.

Getting freaked out by a seemingly positive dream. Somehow they seem scarier than the nightmares. It seems extra dark and quiet this morning. I only have one more week before I'm on holiday. I'm planning on doing as little as possible. My car is fixed! I made it to T last night. Of all the song...

Grr! My car's battery is completely dead. It's moments like this I wish most I had a support network, or someone with jump leads. I'm not panicking, but I really hope I've got it sorted by Wednesday- T day. I'm missing yoga because of this. And today was going so well.

It's such fun starting the day off with a nosebleed. Now I can't blow my nose. I still have no idea where my head is at. It's like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. I think going for a walk would help, but my hip hurts.

A similar thing happened to me when my father died. I had no appetite and no interest in food. I remember I ate nothing but soup for a while. I think routine helps. Sticking to regular mealtimes, even if that meal is just a piece of toast. And not worrying too much about what you're eating as...

From Sherlock: The Abominable Bride Sherlock (in response to a question about why Mrs Hudson is not talking): "She has taken to literary criticism by way of satire. It it a distressing trend in the modern landlady."

I have another cold. I haven't even got over the last one! My face, eyes and throat feel like they've been scrubbed with sandpaper. Oh joy. Guess I'm not cooking a decent meal tonight. I got a really nice thankyou from a guy at work today, after I rescued him from an agressive tw*t of a...

@Muttly yep! They're in a shop in town. They're so big they fill a shopping trolley!

When one half of your head remembers something, but the other half doesn't.

More fatigue. Tuesdays are the longest day. I keep getting tempted by the giant unicorn teddybears. I can't believe I'm making plans for next year! I hope I like oatcakes.

There's lots of different types now. It used to be you only ever saw the little plastic and paper ones that would fall off ten minutes after you bought them. Now you get metal ones, jewelled ones, big ones for your car, and this year I've seen knitted ones. Not sure that the cost of purchase...