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It's been awhile since I've been on and in my opinion that's a good thing. But, here I am, back again and not feeling very optimistic. A few months ago I changed my medication provider hoping to find someone who can work collaboratively with me- educate me about what medications are used for...

I'm being assessed by a new psych med provider. I had my first appt that lasted 2 hours and it was exhausting but beneficial. I have a complex list of already diagnosed disorders including, general anxious disorder with psychotic features, major depression disorder, borderline personality...

Thank you for the information. This is a psych med appt and I too plan on giving a very brief mention of having parts and how it effects me daily. If I don't then I can only imagine how confusing I'd sound. Take care

I'm meeting with a new med provider this week. I'm so nervous about so many things. I have DID parts and as much as I want to believe they won't come with me that just won't be the case. Im not the kind of person who just tells all. It's taken the parts years to slowly open up to my therapist...

I've been married over 20 years and although our relationship began with a lot of affection, throughout the years it's dwindled to the point I no longer like it. Throughout the years I've discovered I have unprocessed childhood trauma that's changed who I am. I have been working on it with my...

Why is my marriage failing? Many reasons. I've been in individual counseling for over 15 years learning how to deal with life's ups and downs, how to find a voice when all I've ever done is remain quiet and internalize to my detriment. I've learned skills, found my voice and worked hard to be a...

It's becoming more apparent to me that my husband has a huge fear of abandonment. Overtime this has negatively effected our marriage. Part of the problem exists because he doesn't believe in mental health treatment and has said he doesn't need to pay someone just to get a diagnosis. Because of...

My world will be empty soon. My one and only daughter will be gone for a week and missing Thanksgiving for the first time. I already struggle with major depression as well as many other dx. But this event most certainly has increased the symptoms. Although she's 19, she is my one and only child...

I've struggled with my parts who become triggered easily by noise, smell, tactile, visual and ole factory hallucinations. I've tried creating safe places for them to go when things are tough and I need to accomplish tasks. This has become a problem at work and has left to disorganization, land...

It's horrible. Major Depressive Disorder and psychosis. It's taking hours away from my day. Some of my DID parts are 100% certain what we see and hear. They look up all the things that counts be the cause. But. No one believes us. Our medical doctor checked us and found nothing. I've...

I thought about opening my own savings account and depositing a portion of my paycheck into it. That way I can have money saved for things that come up and the feeling of control because no one else can spend it. Anytime I've pushed back to do what I really want to do is met with his body...

I have a very hard time with confrontation. I don't even get to say one sentence before he already has a rebuttal and will go on justifying why he's correct. It's very triggering for me and I've never been a fast thinker and he's the opposite. I'd like to think I know what he's trying to say but...

When did my husband change or are we more aware of it? The comments and ways of speaking to us bet little us, push us aside, less worthy of doing things, even when no money is spent. Declaring he's the patriarch of the family. He gets to decide everything. Yet, he doesn't think about me even...

I'm not certain when it got worse but slowly and quietly. With the shorter days happening it feels like we're DID) being suffocated. My daughter is growing up, my father is distant from my sister and brother and always posts pictures of him, his wife and her child. Invitations to get together...

I'd love to go back 15 years ago and be a better mother to my only child. Show her more love, engage more with her. But, I can't. I have a lot of regrets but I will say she's a good 19 year old with commendable qualities. This will be my first Thanksgiving without my child. She is traveling to...

We are so acutely in tune with the day to day routines and expectations. It's like a perfect pendulum that when one thing off sets it, the system explodes in chaos. I'll add that we don't hold any personal expectations because anytime we try, it never happens therefore it's no surprise. Our...

Hello, in 3: weeks I'm having surgery to remove my fallopian tubes as well as my left ovary and a new IUD. Has anyone had this surgery? I struggle with mental health especially this time of year. I'm nervous about having it done and if my mental health will decline. Thank you

I'm on an anti psychotic medicine and it doesn't seem to help. If I increase the dose, it silenced my parts and makes me very tired and hungry. I don't know if other types would work better. It's tactile hallucinations and I also smell weird things. I keep it to myself because no one in my world...

Ok, I'll start out by saying I have did so if I should say " we" that's why. Seeing bugs that apparently don't exist despite being evaluated is one of the worst symptom of major depression and anxiety. It fuels the two because all we want is for someone to believe us. We spend upwards of an hour...

Thank you for your kind words. You have a lot of good points. My highest parts name is literally Evil and she does have a lot to say but I myself don't know what it is and I'm ok with it. But my world has flipped upside down and I miss my parts family. Best of luck to you, thank you

My system is off balance. A good chunk of my parts are away and hiding from an evil part who wants nothing but to end us all. It's a terrible feeling because I don't know if and when they'll return and if the evil part will step aside. I'm left.. alone although I do have two other parts around...

I wake up in the mornings and wish I hadn't. I wish I would sleep and never wake up. That would be the cure to my pain, end the daily fight to move one foot in front of the other while pretending everything was ok. Everything isn't ok in my minds (did). It's having a crowd of people all wanting...

That refers to dissociating and feeling so far from myself. Sometimes I can hear snippets of voices, other times I I know words are coming out of my mouth but not from me. I fear the times I have no recollection. I'm working with my t to be more present, the reasons why, and coping methods. She...

I know I'm not happy. In my marriage and it breaks my heart to even write it here. I know he loves me, and misses the old me. The one who did it all - pay bills, cleaned, worked a steady job, social, excited to spend time with him and rarely argued. We had similar things in common and it was...

Yes, I have a therapist whom I see 2x a week and she knows what's going on. I can continue to try and ask the parts to let me know if at least one wants to be brave, and speak to me, even if it's for a short time. I don't feel right and so lost. They were my everything