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  1. V

    Finally Free

    As of March 30, 2015 I earned back my freedom. 5 years of ongoing sexual abuse are finally coming to a close, and I couldn't feel more alive.
  2. V

    Physical Pain?

    I just got threw vomiting a over the pool table I was laying on ( gross, I know ). Does anyone else get really terrible pains in the abdomen before a flash back? The pains made me sick, and I don't know what to do.
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    Do Loud Noises Incite Panic?

    Hey there. So i just came from my college 3-D sculpture course, in which lots of heavy machinery and blades are in use. For some reason, as soon as the heavy machinery and saws came on i started to feel this overwhelming sense of panic, doom, and became extremely hyper-vigilant. Do any other...
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    I Hold My Own Death As A Card In The Deck To Be Played When There Are No Other Cards Left

    So it seems that death is the only card left. Despite being away from home, my PTSD and depression have been much worse than ever before. Most days come out to be bad days, even if they start out alright. i've had it. If i'm not constantly terrified of my actual abuser coming here to do as he...
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    Unrelenting, Vivid Nightmares

    For the last two weeks i've been having a very specific nightmare, over and over again. In it i relive previous rapes and subsequently become pregnant with my assaulters child. Every night i've woken up sweating and utterly mortified. Then throughout the day i can't seem to shake the fear that...
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    Running Out Of Places To Run

    To anyone reading this, i am sorry. It's going to be long and droning and possibly triggering. So... i've been dealing with my complex PTSD for nearly four years now, and it seems to be inescapable. Recently, i left home to begin my first year at college, hoping i would be able to create some...
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