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(Googled ADHD symptoms are static) On the topic of ADHD symptoms persisting or not, according to the second edition of Child Psychopathology(pages 89-92), it depends on the criteria used by researchers. If you use the DSM criteria and interview adults that had it as kids, just 5% report that...

Interesting. I never thought of it like that. I'm just wondering if control can be learned regardless of the age (ex. past 50). I am also thinking that the more someone has isolated themselves the less practice they have had at using control. Then there is the fact that rage can be either...

priceless :-)

Have you considered seeing each other without moving in together? I am 6 years younger than you and the only reason I can take the lash outs is cause we physically separate whenever there is signs of irritability. I also dissociate and numb the feelings but this is not something I recommend nor...

You asked about relationship issues. Whether you are normal, have PTSD or ADHD, relationships will eventually cause more stress than you can handle. I get to keep my close friends. I have never been able to keep a sexual boy-girl relationship going longer than 5 years. I am always in at least...

Monday update: Boss: "I assume you have a very good explanation for not showing up. I have made a new schedule for Febuary and I want you to hang it on your fridge. This must not happen ever again." Me: "I take this very seriously. I am taking all the steps I can to prevent this from happening...

60 years of ADHD. I couldn't keep any student jobs (like waitressing) but did very well in school and got a masters in software engineering. I work and play best with calm quiet and nerdy types. I was always told that I would not succeed and that I would never get to keep a job....I did...

>Do I just focus on what I need to get through everyday life and tackle issues as they arise? I prefer that personally. Be goal oriented. Focus on behaviours you need and want to change. If you can find a good hypnotherapist ..I have had huge leaps with that.

Thank you all so much. I'd like to share what happened the next time he lashed out at me. It was a very loud overreaction caused by his "not needing" my help. I asked him several times to lower his voice and calm down to no avail. Then I said "I cannot participate in this sorry". Minutes later...

How does one go about setting boundaries without them sounding like ultimatums? What is the difference between the two? I have no problems being or talking assertively like "please don't use that tone of voice" but "I'll do this if you do that"....is not a part of my vocabulary. usually i just...

Hi as you probably know I am new at posting here. I am really touched by the responses here. They all seem to come from a good place. @lostforgottensoul Forgive me for jumping in as I have not really read the post that provoked all this. You have all the right in the world to tell people how you...

I got diagnosed incorrectly as bipolar by a doc that had never heard of ADHD. The meds literally almost killed me. I switched docs until I found one that didn't mind being questioned and challenged by someone who just needs to understand. He got me off meds completely and I never will go back...

@FridayJones I like and respect him very much. The day I wrote this post, he had been the most abusive I have ever seen him be. Of course, I did not like the behaviour one bit. He's been controlling and nasty about 2% of the time. He's been dissociative while pleasant about 80%. He's been...

@Heather, SheilaKathy The “as if” principle says if we act like we’re happy and confident, we can become more happy and confident. The idea dates back to the turn of the 20th century and to the work of Victorian philosopher William James. Working at Harvard University, James proposed a radical...

"someone who suffers from PTSD has a harder time sexually with someone they love and care about." @Sangamo absolutely. But what if we use words like respect instead of love? My situation is weird cause I am more of a no strings attached gal and he is celibate?religious/loner. All we can agree...

>tips for how they've gotten through to their sufferer? Its not the perfect plan. I am all smiles and sunshine at all times: no complaints and I do not share my downs and always find an excuse to celebrate. It relaxes him cause he gets the illusion that he does not have to worry about me. Hey it...

It is a dangerous dance. I am a notorious mother teresa type. I write like crazy when I need grounding. @seedling Where does the feeling behind "Not gonna happen" come from? Four things happened the past 5 months: 1)June: My dad died this summer at the same time I met this guy. My dad had been...

I can really relate to this one: "He kept saying he doesn't want us to have these discussions. He can't handle conflict." I could handle that if he got more physical. Its kind of cute watching him get all scared like a kitten and then not :-( He sees it like me declaring war on isolation. I...

Miss Lissa: It seems that he is choosing you to be his bride every time he is with you. He is not there cause he has to but because he wants to. He will value what you do more than what you say. These are just things that I have concluded from personal experience and this forum. The rules that...

@Ms Spock I used the search function. Where are articles kept? I have followed this forum for 5 months before I ever started posting. My ex gaslighted me between 2000-2005. Gaslighting was what costed me a 10 year meltdown. I am super careful not to do it to anyone. Bloom-in-Winter posted: "A...

@Casey_03: I am aware that I may be in deep denial. I'd say chances are 50-50. That is why I am here and that is why I see a therapist. I prefer it here cause no one sugar coats. I deeply appreciate the bluntness. My guy has not conditioned me to be afraid to speak my mind. Someone else like him...

@seedling: thx. Exactly what I am looking for. I lack the courage to ruin our very few precious moments by bringing up any conflicts. He often asks me not to bring up conflicts. I can almost see him struggling to communicate calmly. It ends often in anger and dissociation. We go to cafes so I am...

I need to know how to talk to him when he starts bullying. "Don't tell me what to do" is not going to cut it. We are neither codependent or interdependent. And we are no where near a healthy relationship. I really thought I was being clear but my therapist has also asked me what problem am I...

@Jemini: No reason to be gentle :) I need bluntness. LOL ok I see how I might come across a bit like a masochist or unhealthy. I assure you I am not either. Perhaps a bit over-confident if anything. What I meant by that line is that I have loads of resources now and I will drop him if my health...

When my guy gets agitated, I am usually good at calming him and then exiting. We don't live together. Neither of us are military. We meet in public places usually. I want advise on how to tackle a particular behaviour that only comes up when he feels over stressed. He will get very dominant "Buy...