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I can sympathize/empathize with Srain somewhat. I don't remember getting close enough to a person to yell (if I did, maybe I don't want to right now), but I have had some extreme road rage incidents with people who tailgated the hell out of me while we both yelled, screamed, flipped each other...

Massive denial is an understatement. My uncle told me a few things about their home life that really bothered me.

Mercy: It's hard to change patterns- especially if we've spent our lives following them. You do not have to put up with emotional abuse (or any type for that matter). You are important just as you are no matter what anyone else says to the contrary.

I had a major headache for half of the day (I think it was a mini-migraine) BUT, I still managed to make some yummy egg bread dough! I baked homemade burger buns and chocolate chip oatmeal cookies yesterday. :D I enjoy cooking!

I sometimes get food cravings. *shrugles* Right now, I feel sort of meh again. Maybe I'm blocking, avoiding or in denial. Weekends are usually a mixed bag. I'm trying to learn to enjoy them. Hard work in the garden usually tires me out and numbs me a bit (or maybe I mean it calms me, hmm, have...

Today I started mulching one of my gardens. Pulled weeds, etc. It's starting to look nice now. Therapeutic.

Right now only two people (besides the forum) know about it. I think it's gonna stay that way too.

I feel sort of meh and am craving orange juice.

This is a tough question for me. Part of me has forgiven and part of me is still stuck in denial. I can understand some of the factors which may have affected my father's violent attacks. They were never appropriate or justified in any way, but I can understand why he was so unbalanced. My...

Heather: I'm so sorry for your loss. Pets are the family we never had, but always deserved.

Gum is a great outlet for me. Chew. Chew. Chew. At work I tend to move around a lot- walking, writing on the board, etc. Keeps my mind busy and off of 'things to worry about.' I could never wear earplugs myself. I'd be too afraid of what I might 'miss.'

I feel lonely and unwanted.

Scared- again. I hate weekends.

Ayesha: You are a brave and courageous person! Well done!

I clicked on the link and I saw 4 birds that looked like herons.

You could tell her this ^. Ts are the 'neutral party', well, that's what they're supposed to be. Family is usually either too biased, judgmental or the root of the problem.

AM: Good for you for taking care of yourself! I agree that it is difficult to break out of an abusive/controlling/toxic relationship. Celebrate your new freedom!

I didn't get enough sleep. I have to 'trick' myself so I can get to sleep. It took longer than usual last night.

I'm feeling scared of letting the world down. I know that sounds ridiculous. I suppose I'm going into one of my 'child modes.' I just don't want to be punished again.

My parents actually gave me a book to read when I was about 13- "The Power of Positive Thinking" which is a book from the 50's. I glanced at it. I was mortified and humiliated because part of me believed them when they told me there was something 'wrong' with me. They seemed to love putting all...

UGH! I've heard this one too!

Heh, I didn't know suffering was quantitative. I got something similar from my father about being 'tough.' I had to be 'tough' to get through life. Apparently, according to him, I didn't want to be 'weak' or a 'chicken shit.' So, kind of a similar reference...

I heard this a lot from my mother when I was young. Did. Not. Help.

Thinking of you Heather. Please take care of yourself and be gentle.

I used to kick my ex in my sleep a lot. He'd get angry about it, but then again he was angry and sulky about everything I did because I didn't do it 'right.' I do get a giggle that I used to kick him. He deserved it so much. For the record, I do not kick my current bf in my sleep or at all (not...