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The safe place- perhaps this is because I dissociate so much? I think I mean it’s a familiarity/I’m there so much in my head that being in the present is quite hard work- it’s easier to go there or stay there in the memories/flashbacks (although the fb is way more intense esp if a longer scene...

How often do you have flashbacks on an average day? Sometimes I feel like flashbacks are the safe place...is this unusual?

@Sweetleaf thank you for this reassurance and just helping me realign with the truth @Swift your reminder about the instinct/survival nature of the body is also so reassuring These are helpful things to keep shifting my focus back onto. Thank you

Interesting. Raw. Graphic. Helpful. I think what underlies the question really is ‘Why did I let him?’ Why did I let him in my head? That’s how he got into my body. I think he even got into my heart. I was a lonely child. At times a heartbroken child. He came with comfort. I sit and watch him...

Thank you for the reassurance- lots of what you say is so similar for me esp the depersonalisation/derealisation. I think that makes processing difficult. This is one thing I’ve read too about personal safety as the human instinct kicks in. And I get it. Totally. If it wasn’t me. I think the...

I’m sure someone will move this if in the wrong place. I’m struggling with a flashback/scene/memory from which I am very detached. I feel no emotion just a sense of unbelief whilst watching. My body is then physically/sexually aroused and I can’t stop the scene or the wanting to watch. But I...

Very brave of you. I can’t say I was either selling sex nor pornography but I was on the other side of the table, screen etc buying and partaking. Again a brief span of my life but a significant one nonetheless. Rescued by true love, marriage and a family...but now coming to terms with parts...

Noticing is a good start- knowing it’s the safety need has been key to me addressing how to make myself safe. I’m still new to it because I don’t know what safe always feels like and I don’t feel safe with myself. Very simply for me currently a hug that is tight and firm. A rough tangible...

Really? How do? Intrigued! Slightly concerned.

Interesting yes, helpful, in part. Not sure it answers my question but then I’m not sure I really had one. I prefer yes and no answers not interpretation/perspective, something to do with growing up with lots of rules I guess.

Is it like a door where you first open and see only a bit and shut it then next time you open expecting that bit so leave it a bit longer and you see more then shut it? My flashbacks feel like the same snippet playing over and over rather than ever a start, full play out then finish of an...

I am new to this whole world of flashbacks. I used to think I was just silly but now I’m in a safe adult world the flashes come stronger and I am connecting the dots in as much a way as one ever really can with trauma memories (they’re never really accurate are they?) Anyway my flashbacks/scenes...

Take one step at a time. In my experience you will know if you’re feeling better esp if lack of sleep has a part to play. And it’s entirely ok to say ‘I don’t know how I’m meant to feel’ if you’re stumped and not feeling much different. The biggest factor is if you feel worse go straight back.

I struggled with getting the 2 together too but my therapist advised me to and initially my GP was a bit dismissive because I had self referred but then I was in there again for a check up after starting meds and she was more understanding and now 2 months down the line I’m glad I did, they have...

Oh I could have written this word for word right down to the female figure and the chest pain! How did you break out of it?

Thank you. I am getting to grips with my T, she is very good but I’m just learning how to relate and keep boundaries etc. I’ve been seeing her for 2 months only. We are similar in age and I wonder if that causes hesitation on my part- like we could be friends so I would text or email her and I...

I feel like I’m in this now and I’ve spent all morning trying to work out who or how to get help. I go full circle back to saying to myself I’m being dramatic and to get on with everything then round to the anxiety and fear of work and how I won’t cope and will be in a daze...I’m scared to...

Everything feels too hard. I can distract myself endlessly with purposeful things as I work full time and have a family but at work when I stop or pause to change task I find myself suddenly trudging through fog and unable to get going again. I have a long commute during which time I end up...

Thank you. I am in therapy. I know I need to. Exploring EMDR but the first attempt sent me into a spiral so we’ve scaled back a little.

I’m so glad to read this thread. I had a moment with my T this week that looked like she was moving into a space to hug me: we don’t touch, I never even shook her hand to meet her, I’ve also moved out of her reach before (not that she was trying to touch me but in the intense emotional sections...

Not sure what to write here. I’m trying to get underneath more of the CPTSD side of things as it impacts my day to day life so much. I think I fall into the high functioning category and I guess suffer in silence. I fear a breakdown or possible suicide my bring the end of my pain.