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And I forgot to say he is a young teenager, so he's at such at critical point in his social development and his education both.

Hopeless. Depressed. Feel useless and a failure. Highly anxious. My son is having a lot of trouble going to school, due to social anxiety and OCD. He missed most of the previous year with pain and mobility problems, which led to isolation, and then to the social anx and OCD. The pain and...

Hi there. I wish you had more answers here, and I haven't got much to suggest. I am triggered by darkness, uncovered windows at night, and being alone at night, among other things, but those are the ones relevant to your question. My flashbacks are of someone coming through my window, and...

Well, I'm not DID, but I feel like and act like a small child when triggered, and my T thinks now that I've split off around 3. And that's what I'm scared of accessing on my own. I think I'll wait until my T is back from holidays, and ask her again about the book etc, as she suggested it weeks...

Solara - I missed the point on that one! It should have been obvious. I had such an "ohhh" moment when I read that. @WillyKat That answer was ridiculously helpful for me, and I appreciate the time and thought you took to explain it as you did. This is my problem I think. I haven't wanted to...

I agree Bedbug that if it were to be used to excuse behaviour rather than striving for change and healing, it wouldn't be useful at all.

My understanding was as Digger1 said -as far as I understand, by caring for the inner child we are meeting the unmet needs, thereby achieving resolution and integration. That's how I understand the rationale anyway. It would be interesting to know how well it works for most people.

@arfie Thanks for your input. I guess a lot of things that feel weird can still be useful, even good, even without proof. For instance, it feels weird and uncomfortable to accept a compliment, yet it is still good for me. I do know that when I am triggered and freak out, I feel and act like a...

@Barconian Thanks for the encouragement. I've had a rough trot lately, so I appreciate it.

@digger1 I guess it would help if you knew what I was talking about! It's a book that states that if our needs are violated or not met in childhood, we continue to try and get those needs met as adults, essentially being like little children in adult bodies. He has a chapter on each stage...

A while back, my T suggested "Homecoming" by John Bradshaw as being a helpful book - she called it "powerful". It took ages to arrive, and a lot happened in therapy between the suggestion and the arrival of the book (it took a month to get here!). I'm reading it, and got a couple of little...

@Barconian Possums are cool, but it wasn't a possum. Much better if it had been.

@Barberian For me - the Denver Broncos losing the Super Bowl. I was shocked and disappointed, as I thought they'd win, but it won't cause PTSD. For you - why couldn't Seattle win while you were still a fan? At least you're right that it won't cause you further trauma!

I've been really distressed tonight. I'm ok now, but feeling very fragile, anxious and hopeless.

@Miss_Understood That is awesome to hear!

I'm so sorry for all that you have gone through, and for what you are going through now. No, none of it was your fault, and you are far from over-reacting. I suspect some of the people who have dismissed you would be beside themselves with even a fraction of what you have endured. Your cat -...

So great that you are out!!! That lady is unbelievable - to think she is a therapist is very alarming indeed. Your son did some good thinking under great stress in calling them on their threat (of the cops). I hope you and your kids can start to feel safe now, and release some of that stress.

Welcome to the forum. Whatever the reasons for your mother behaving as she did (and it sounds like there could be many), it seems that the result was the emotional neglect of her children. One thing that helped me understand my parents (and myself) better was reading a book mentioned in one of...

Welcome to the forum. Your post was easy to follow, you did a good job! It's no good to hear you're having such a hard time right now, but you've reached out to a great community here, it's a safe place.

No wonder you feel triggered and unsafe. I really feel for you, in this situation. I too, agree with all ill has said. Work towards safety, in any way you can manage. I don't think I can add anything above what ill has posted, just wanted to add another supporting voice.

Tired and unmotivated. Stuck inside my head.

I'ts awesome that you've been able to realise what was going on - it's so hard to do. Maybe you can change the outcome - by not allowing it any longer.

I've tried and failed to write many posts. I do manage a quite a few, but there's quite a few that don't get posted too. I re-read about 10 times at least - this post is no different. Shame and self-hate are big problems for me also. I'm sure most of the time that I'll say something wrong, or...

@Barconian I think sometimes I don't express myself very well. That's actually what I was trying to say. That he needs to change, which I thought was ironic in that he's still trying to change Solara.

Maybe you've noticed change before they have. People just aren't very good at noticing these things I don't think. And - well, it seems on here that most of us hide stuff anyway, so he may not realise just how much change there actually is. As others have stated too - the dynamic will be...