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Errant

It feels like the moment before someone lands a punch on your face.

Heh. I have to repeatedly surgically remove The Wife from the X-Box controller. Largely because I want to do up my nice hall at Lakeview.

I'm feeling stronger today. A bit more like myself. I passed my interview for the fire brigade, so I have a goal to work toward: passing the point of entry test.

I feel sorry. I feel bad for being here. Shame, guilt..

Survive until tomorrow.

nose :blackeye:

limb

Tea works for me. That or smoking my pipe.

I like it when folks do things like that. I know it's maybe only symbolic to most people these days, but...well, some of us still believe in that sort of thing.

PUN :woot:

The monitors that partly obscure my face from the rest of the ops room. Means my colleagues can't see my twitching.

Lonely. A bit stressed and desperate for somebody to talk to.

I have nightmares quite often. They come in two flavours: 1. Familiar places burning and ruined. Smoke and flames on the horizon. A powerful but unidentified enemy is approaching and I'm in command of a small unit tasked with delaying their advance while the civilian population get away...

I like the dark, so long as I'm not alone. Only at night, though. I hate missing out on sunshine. We don't get much of it up here at 57 North...

With me it was guilt. I mean, obviously I'm not dead, but that's not for lack of trying.

I did for years, though it seems to have gone away now. While I felt I became unwell very recently, my doc reckons I initially got PTSDified when I was a kid. Which is a bit of a relief, in a way, as I just thought I was a horrible crazy person. I do tend to get into fights, but usually...

I'll just wait and see them when they come back up here for the beer festival.. :D

I could see all my facebook friends on one tank of fuel - if they aren't at sea or deployed, that is- as they all live within a twenty mile radius of my house. Except for three awkward bastards who now live an average of about 500 miles away. I'd have to stop and fill up to get to them. Damned...

Like a log. My wife is back. :inlove:

Grim determination. Nobody dies today.

Post

I agree. I've started calling out kids on their behaviour in public -nobody else seems to be bothered- but I'm always expecting some knuckle-dragging 'parent' to come charging out from behind a bush and have a go at me for it.

drummer

My friends have all been very supportive about it (I think they all figured it was only a matter of time), but I'm worried that they see me as being too fragile to have fun with or, worse, as being dangerously unstable, given that their exposure to PTSD is pretty much limited to Rambo and Happy...