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I was talking about this with my psychologist the other day because I think that I have aspects of BPD and other personality disorders but I also have CPTSD. I do find a lot of things in mental health are interchangeable and people shouldn't be ashamed because they have one "label" or another.

It is good that we have forums like this to make us realise we are not alone. I think in your 40s is quite a common time for repressed memories to come back to people from what my psychologist has told me. One psychiatrist told me he knew someone in their 70s who started to remember. I wish you...

@Mach123 It is strange how everything makes sense now.Before 4 months ago I had never even thought of CSA but then the trigger that I had I knew instantly that something had happened to me as a child.It was like somebody had come along and turned on a switch. I kept saying to my psychologist...

I had no recognition of CSA until 4 months ago.I always remembered the physical abuse from my childhood but it wasn't until I had a major trigger that I started to remember CSA. My psychologist has said to me that it is not uncommon for people to have repressed memories but CSA can affect you in...

Let me start by saying first of all that I think that you are a wonderful person who has helped me so much over the last year. Sometimes I would like to know how you think and feel on a human level rather than just as a psychologist. Do you really care about me or are you just saying that to...

I have lots of stomach problems including acid reflux and it is definitely connected to my mental health and I found it was at its worse just before I started to remember some repressed memories. I went to my GP and they gave some medication to suppress the acid and it helped quite a lot.

I am in my early 40s and I have occasionally self harmed in the past but a few months ago I had a major trigger and I started to remember some repressed memories.Ever since then I have been self harming at least twice a day. For me at the moment it is the only way I can deal with the feelings...

I avoid being touched in any kind of way. I avoid anyone who comes into my personal space. I try avoid human beings as much as possible because I find it difficult to have relationships.I am scared of getting too close to people. At the moment I am avoiding music because it is a trigger for me.

I think you have done amazingly well by letting your T touch you and squeezing your hand.You should be proud of yourself. We all need different things in therapy and I don't think your T will think you are needy at all.

@Hopeforlife I know exactly how you are feeling.A couple of weeks ago I was completely suicidal and I was sitting in my therapy session and my psychologist kept asking me if I was suicidal and I couldn't give him a honest answer.I wanted to tell him but I was scared of what would happen next. I...

I don't think that I want to make any friends in the future as I am not very good at relationships. I can't be bothered with being hurt again. That the last 3 months have been sh*t and a complete nightmare. I am relieved that my therapy session went ok this morning. I wonder where my...

For the first time in ages I had a full nights sleep and that is due to a increase in my medication.

The last TV series I watched was Patrick Melrose. I can honestly say that Patrick is the only person that I have managed to have any connection with over the last 2 months. I only started to remember my CSA memories 3 months ago because I had kept my memories repressed for many years and then I...

Congratulations to you both and wishing you a very happy future together.

Emotionally and physically tired. Feel like giving up. Feeling confused in regards to if my psychologist ever cared about me or was he just speaking sh*t the whole time. Feeling like I should have been stronger and dealt with my emotions instead of calling the crisis team. Feeling like how much...

I wish this pain would go away I have ruined everything by not being strong enough I bet my psychologist is having a party because he doesn't have to see me again I hope the crisis team come on time today I am a useless human being

You should do what ever makes you feel comfortable.If you feel like you need a session next week then you should contact definitely contact your T.

Hugging my favourite cushion which for me at the moment is like a protective barrier for me. Mints are good for me as well especially when I am feeling panicky.

I have had a mixed experience with the NHS and I think it depends on the area where you live and the type of therapists which are available. Where I used to live was a very populated area I got the usual 12 weeks sessions and I have to admit I found that very difficult to deal with.However a...

Sorry to here you are feeling low at the moment and I hope things improve for you soon. I am in the depth of depression myself at the moment. I think that there is great misconception in the outside world that people who are depressed are just sad all the time. For me sadness makes up a small...

Thank you @Searching4Self as well.Your last post was informative and really helpful to me. Transference is a really difficult concept to deal with in therapy both the positive and negative experiences but for me personally I don't think I could have trusted my T and have been so open and honest...

Up until 8 weeks ago I had really positive transference towards to my T.To me he was the most perfect person in the world and I had these really strong feelings towards him. Then something happened in the outside world and I had a major trigger in regards to my childhood and I am in a really...

I have to agree with alot of what @barefoot has written. Speaking from my own experience with my T and judging by this post and your past posts it does sound to me like you are attached to your T already. The part where you wrote" how can you not develop feelings" is a dead give away to your...

My dad left me when I was 8 and he abused me in 3 different ways.Recently I found out that he had died to 3 years ago and I went through a range of different emotions. My T told me there are no right or wrong feelings when it comes to dealing with your abuser being ill or their death.I think you...

I do this all the time.Even when I am in my therapy sessions I will sit there having a conversation with myself in my head.