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I was sexually assisted by 3 males at the age of 19, one was consensual before I blacked out, the other two were not. Since then, I have been extremely aroused by BDSM, enjoy role playing situations where I am dominated and can only ever reach orgasm if during sex I am fantasizing about rape. I...
Hi baby bear. I have had a similar experience, I recently had a go at writhing down my experience of sexual assault on paper and during that time I noticed tingling sensations in my private parts. I have no idea why or how to stop it and I too have concerns that a part of me must have "liked it"...
Wow. What a traumatic thing to have experienced. It is difficult enough that you were in a car accident, but then the physical damage that you endured, topped with work wanting to get rid of you and co-workers thinking you were playing the whole thing up. For many people with PTSD and in my own...
Juggling in a way is a grounding technique as it helps keep you focused on a particular task, there is the element of touch and it is pretty difficult to juggle successfully if your mind is elsewhere. It is fantastic you have found something that works for you :)
HB x
It is different here is Australia, but the guidelines for psychologists suggest that one has to wait 2 years from finishing therapy if they want to engage in a relationship with a client. He is right in what he has said that he has done wrong here and you trusted him and he was in a position of...
Welcome :) that must be hard knowing that you have PTSD symptoms but the woman you are relying on is neglecting this. Have you considered going to your GP or seeing if there is another professional who will address what is important to you? There is lots of support here so hopefully you keep...
I can't say that I have but that would be truly awful to feel stressed all the time. You must feel exhausted. Do you have a therapist that you have discussed these issues with? It's great that you are trying to observe the stress as opposed to letting it consume you.
Of course it would be difficult to "relax" and let your guard down if you have been subject to trauma. It sounds as though the fear is really strong for you. Meditation is really really tough. I have found that taking baby steps has helped. As in starting with 10 seconds, and then 20 seconds...
That sounds like a really scary experience and it seems as though you are being impacted by the fact that he comes to have sex with you when you may not be fully awake or consenting. I have experienced something similar when my husband has gone to have sex with me, I have resisted, he has...
Welcome! I think it's great that you are so passionate about making sure health practitioners know more about the experience of PTSD. I think that more people who have experience various mental health issues should be the ones providing support (obviously once they are in a place of wellness...
Welcome to this forum :) PTSD comes in many forms and just because you have the diagnosis, doesn't meant that you aren't able to function in life. It is great to hear that you are still able to get through each day, go to work, be there for your kids and do study, despite the presence of your...
I am wanting to engage in trauma processing and EMDR, until now I have not done any therapy of this kind. During the time of my trauma, I was under the influence of escstacy, and am concerned that this would have impacted my ability to file away memories. I know that dissociating during trauma...
It is not you. It is never your fault. You said "no", you said no in more ways that one. It is always the fault of the perpetrator who chooses to ignore you, who chooses to assault you, who chooses to rape you. It is not through fault of your own. I am sorry that your boundaries and your wishes...
Trying medications is a scary process, but good on you for considering it! There is definitely a place for medication in supporting mental health. With regards to your psychiatrist, it doesn't sound as though he really listened to what you were experiencing and what you wanted. Which is...
Well done on your achievements. As someone who has just begun to want to seek treatment for her trauma, I recognize the long road ahead. You should be incredibly proud of yourself, as you are the one who has done the hard yards. :)
HB x
You definitely shouldn't feel guilty for going shopping! It is something we can do to treat ourselves and helps us to make up feel more positive about ourselves. Well done for doing that :) keep it up!
HB x
I am so happy to hear that you are in a relationship with someone who loves, understands and respects you. For me personally, I used makeup and clothing to cover up how I was really feeling, and some people do the opposite. It is definitely okay to feel beautiful and cute :) glad you are happy
HB x
It sounds really hard as you don't know what is going on for him or what he is feeling. I can imagine he has demons he is battling with at the moment. All you can do is keep being supportive and hopefully he slowly begins to open up :)
HB x
I am in a similar situation. Like you, I was 5 and my cousins were 12-15. My husband finds it difficult to understand what happened. The truth is I find it difficult to make sense of it as well. If you are anything like me, you probably questioned whether it actually happened or whether you...
You may have consented at the beginning, but you changed your mind. So that is considered rape. Just because it wasn't penile penetration, doesn't mean it wasn't rape. It most definitely was.
It's really interesting you felt "better" after the suicide attempt. Almost like a kettle that has reached boiling point and then switched off. Could it be that as a result of the attempt your wife has realized the amount of pain you are in? Either way the main thing is that you are feeling...
It is a tough situation to be in, especially because you care for this person. I think he is lucky to have someone in his life who cares about his wellbeing however I would be cautious around both yours and his boundaries. You don't want your relationship to turn into therapy. He definitely...
I definitely feel that this used to be my go to. I felt that because of the trauma I experienced I was "damaged" and somehow only part of a person that was not worthy of love. So I blocked that part of myself off. Because it was safer that way, I could ensure that I was never hurt again and...