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It says something when a goose can swim in a pothole. ;) I, too, have found this place, and all of you (sufferers and supporters alike!) infinitely helpful. I'm not around much anymore, since I'm in my own healing journey, but, well, I do have some updates I'll post later. Kinda doozies, and...

@NaeNae75 Oh man, I don't have much to add (damn cold is knocking me on my ass and apparently forcing my brains out of my nose) right now, but I wanted to let you know - I feel you. I can imagine this exact situation with me, in fact. Ugh! Hugs to you, you deserve all the happiness and love.

OMG this drove me BA NA NAS. At the time, I had no idea this is what was happening, and hubs wouldn't acknowledge that he would lose time, or that he could be wrong about thinking something happened last week, when it was 2 years ago. One of his "rules" for me, in fact, was that if it was in the...

My sufferer found a barber shop he loves, and the only problems he's had was when they put a hot towel on his face - it triggered his claustrophobia. He was totally not expecting it to do that, and it was apparently a one time thing so far, but they're really great at this shop, and they are...

Full disclosure: My sufferer and I are separated, have been for 2 years (!!! where did the time go), and still not any closer to divorcing OR getting back together. When we were together, we had a dead bedroom for....I think it had been 3 years since we'd had any sort of sexual contact at that...

If you're in counseling as a couple, and he's not doing his own trauma work...that can go badly. Sufferer and I had a dead bedroom for a long time, and all the "it's not you!" in the world doesn't make it better when there is no other work towards changing it.

@Never_falter2 Oh, no, I didn't mean I thought your guy was playing trauma olympics. It actually sounds more like YOU think you haven't suffered "enough" or experienced "enough" trauma to need to heal from anything. IE, in comparison to others, your own trauma is small, and therefore you have no...

@Never_falter2 It sounds as if you've had enough invalidation in your life. One thing I've learned is don't play trauma (or suffering) olympics. It's certainly not a competition. I mention this because that is one thing I can't talk to my own sufferer about - he thinks because i haven't had it...

Influenza is no fun! Once you've had actual influenza, you'll never mistake a cold for it again. Hope he feels better soon!

Bluh. That would...yeah that would hurt. Yes, on one hand, technically, he broke up with you. On the other - jeebus at least be consistent. Personally, I would probably ask, and not (necessarily) go by what the son says. Kids pick up on stuff - I knew my dad and his "friend" weren't just...

I think I need to find some yoni stones. It's been awhile since I've been able to really delve into crystals, and my kegels need work - good way to combine them! :D Part of my self-care - I've been allowing myself to actually buy some of the gorgeous tarot decks out there. That's one beauty of...

I'm kind of at this point, too. My therapist (I love this woman) is on a "You need to get laid" path at the moment lol. My last session ended with "Don't even bother with Match. Fetlife. Look it up. Sexytimes, you need them!" rofl I'm glad you had support for your surgery. I'm sorry it wasn't...

I've been splurging on myself. The last 6ish months of finally living alone has been a journey for me. I bought myself a pair of kick-ass boots (I love boots - and I didn't have any that fit right anymore!). I'm refusing to wear clothes that don't fit right and/or make me feel good. I'm finally...

:D love it! Way back in my youth, my German speaking grandparents explained Frau vs Fraulein as Mrs. vs. Miss, ie, married vs unmarried. And they also touched on some of the changes (that were happening even just after WWII) for an equivalent of a woman not being identified according to her...

R.E.D. by A Tribe Called Red Oh. My. Goodness. Seriously good. World mix music done right.

Happy holidays, whatever you choose to celebrate (or not at all!) to one and all. May your celebrations be...well, as stress-free as possible! ??? *hands out Irish coffee*

I would imagine there are, just like many other mental illnesses. Once I learned about the nuances of PTSD (and not just the "soldier flashback" variety), I realized that my dad probably had it, and I'm pretty sure my uncle has it. Both of them were/are undiagnosed. But yeah, it wasn't until I...

No. Nonononono. :P lol, @Freida has covered the rest.

Thanks, folks. Sometimes I feel like "This is adulthood. Put on your big girl panties and get your shit together." Then I realize, no, I HAVE been through a ton, and not just from this relationship, and I may be almost 44 years old and still figuring it out, but figuring it out is a LOT more...

I've found that we sometimes have to walk a fine line between what is said and what is done. My sufferer hated the phrase "actions speak louder than words," generally when he was symptomatic, because his words might say "I love you to the moon and back," but his actions were another matter...

Well, it's been almost 2 years since my dad died and my life went to hell. To recap: Dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer on Thanksgiving 2016, and died on December 14th (about 3 weeks later). I didn't get home on time to see my dad before he died - he thought he'd have until after...

What sort of perspective? We have quite a few, about a lot of things. :)

I learned and practice CBT for my own mental health issues, and it's actually really improved the way I interact with and move through life. I learned it over 20 years ago at this point, and I have used it regularly ever since. I still suffer from anxiety and major depression, but I have the...

This has been my lesson over the last...oh my goodness, almost 2 years...When my sufferer "ended" things, I was in the midst of my own crisis, and I needed his support. I didn't have his support (because he had been triggered, blamed me, stress on top of stress on top of stress happened, and so...

Eh, a lot of people "struggle" when their loved ones are hurting. It's difficult to be completely detached, at least for some. For myself, it was very difficult to focus on the rest of my life when my husband was hurting so badly. Sure, I'd go to work, I'd keep the household running, but that...