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    Steinberg Depersonalization Test

    Got a 70. My DID is severe. I live my life mostly as two different people. There's others, but it only two or three that do most of the work. I lose most of the day, every day. I'm rarely not in a dissociated state.
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    DID Anyone else have parts who mumble?

    Mine never shut up. They have something to say about everything, and I do sometimes speak out loud, not aware that I'm doing it,
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    Just So Done......

    I'm in the opposite place. Everything seems dead right now, like a room of dolls and I cant feel anything. I dont want to scream, I dont want to run, I dont want to get laid, or drink, or snort H, or even go home. I feel like nothing can soothe me right now. I feel like a corpse. My depression...
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    Went To Urgent Care For Deep Cut

    I cut so deep I had to go to an urgent care type facility. The ER would be all night and I was afraid of pysch eval. I was not suicidal and felt a lot of shame and regret. The staff was very nice and didnt make me feel like I did something wrong. They asked if I was in distress, the Dr. said...
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    Major self-harm episode

    I'm not going into details as not to trigger, but I had a major episode and feel the shame of hiding wounds all over again. My therapist looked so worried about me it made me feel like I failed her. I've been suicidal for the last few weeks, fluctuating in severity. Same with SH, comes and goes...
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    How Do You Stop Your Life Revolving Around Therapy?

    Good question. I was like that, and it just changed over time, for me, it was someone finally listening to me and it felt good to open up. As I got better I needed to vent less and less. I struggle with seeing my T as a friend, she is not, she is my T and our relationship is professional - not...
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    How Do You Dress For T?

    I'm so insecure I don't leave the house unless I'm well dressed. I haven't worn a T shirt or shorts outside in a long time. I'm a writer so I can dress how I want, but I still dress it up on a daily basis. I don't seek approval, I just don't want to be rejected; there is a difference, at least...
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    Crashed On Prozac

    Thanks all I've been feeling sick all day, and feeling like I don't want to live any more. But, I'm not one who believes that suicide solves anything and I know things change. It just sucks to be so profoundly unhappy and in pain.
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    Crashed On Prozac

    I'm 3 weeks into 10mg of Prozac and it was okay, but it started to change and today I'm almost paralyzed with depression, self-harming thoughts, and lethargic beyond words. I feel so guilty for not being better by now, and so alone in keeping how I feel a secret. I know its bad, but I feel like...
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    Unconventional Ways That Have Helped You Through Depression?

    I wrote a suicide not that became a story, that got published... I would have shot myself for sure if I didn't have the outlet.
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    Childhood Child Therapy Techniques

    My T does some therapy techniques they use with children, and it helps. She has a box of stuffed animals she wants me to hold when I'm twisting my fingers or really figetting. I said, "So, I'm like a disturbed 9 year old?" She said, "Some parts of you are." She's right... that broken boy is...
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    Childhood Im Obsessed With Age 7

    I'm right where you are, same age too. I can't get past it either. Someday, but its not easy.
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    Childhood Parental Abandonment

    I can't stop hurting over being abandoned. Its been with me all day, and its painful - very painful. He just left me. How can you just leave your own flesh? If he really loved me, nothing could keep him away. He showed up again in my early teens and he's always treated me like I'm an idiot...
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    I Made My Therapist Cry

    I made mine cry too, but she cried for me. I was telling her something really painful and she got all misty and started crying, like tears and everything.
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    New Therapist Ultimatum

    I'm really sorry that happened to you. I'm shocked, and that's hard to do. Report her for blackmailing you into more sessions, which = more money.
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    First Therapy Appt.

    Just tell him/her how you feel about therapy. Tell them what you just told us. They can't help if we don't say something. Good luck. Therapy does work.
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    Therapist Said I Was Resistant

    Well said
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    Therapist Said I Was Resistant

    I'd have to question how the T came to that conclusion on the first session? That's usually something that becomes obvious as a pattern of resistance shows in session. I had a T diagnose me as a sociopath after two sessions. I am far from that. I care too much and feel too much, and I always...
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    Touch / Physical Holding

    I'd pay a grand to hug my therapist, once. But that's off limits.
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    Ever Had A Therapist Triggered By What You Need To Talk About?

    I made my therapist cry, like really cry. But, it was because she was truly sad for me, not because it triggered her.
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    Songs You Relate To

    Slipknot: Left Behind I can't stand to see your thalidomide robot face Don't even try it! You had be a liar just to Infiltrate me I'm still drowning (I ignore you) As I close my eyes, I feel it all slipping away (I come toward you) We all got left behind, we let it all slip away
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    Responses To Your Therapist That You Will Probably Never Say

    If you ever tried heroin you'd know why I think about it.
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    Music Dialog Using One Line From Any Song

    once inside, all I hold is ash! - Slipknot
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    Childhood Are You Ok With Your Name?

    Brenton isn't my real name, its my pen name. But, I am Brenton, and writing is my coping skill. When I became a novelist my entire world shifted. I recommend writing to anyone who feels pent up or unable to say the things they want to say. Write a story or even a short book, dont use real names...
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