I cut so deep I had to go to an urgent care type facility. The ER would be all night and I was afraid of pysch eval. I was not suicidal and felt a lot of shame and regret. The staff was very nice and didnt make me feel like I did something wrong. They asked if I was in distress, the Dr. said cuts like that say distress, but I wasn't not at the time, and he didn't push me.
I had to explain where I was when I got home an hour or so late and I told my wife the truth, of all things, and showed her the steri strips and iodine stains. I felt ashamed, but also relieved. The secrecy was crushing me. I dont have to tell you about long sleeves all the time.
I have to tell my T tomorrow which I dread. Make me feel like a failure and I fear her having me hospitalized, which I think I might need. My depression has been really bad the last few days, But I found a new Dr. who knows about trauma and DID and how to use medications without making me worse so I'm hopeful and hanging in there.
If I may share my experience. (not giving advice) If you do cut, and it looks bad, like it needs to be stitched, it probably does, get medical attentions. I could have gotten a nasty infection the cut was so deep. And, I'd be obsessing over it all weekend. I wasn't going to go, but I'm glad I did.
I had to explain where I was when I got home an hour or so late and I told my wife the truth, of all things, and showed her the steri strips and iodine stains. I felt ashamed, but also relieved. The secrecy was crushing me. I dont have to tell you about long sleeves all the time.
I have to tell my T tomorrow which I dread. Make me feel like a failure and I fear her having me hospitalized, which I think I might need. My depression has been really bad the last few days, But I found a new Dr. who knows about trauma and DID and how to use medications without making me worse so I'm hopeful and hanging in there.
If I may share my experience. (not giving advice) If you do cut, and it looks bad, like it needs to be stitched, it probably does, get medical attentions. I could have gotten a nasty infection the cut was so deep. And, I'd be obsessing over it all weekend. I wasn't going to go, but I'm glad I did.
