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that is such a great illustration of how it feels, "the sleepy self" that's when I feel the most basic...self. And look how fast it happens; if you were not paying attention it would be easy to not even notice...

OK, thank you, I was thinking that was common knowledge at this point. I don't want to be removed from this site, so I do appreciate the feedback. It won't happen again

Yeah, it's good to get the affection either way; I believe that's normal too. Do you know about the concept of "schema"? <MOD EDIT TO REMOVE COPYRIGHT MATERIAL> So, it's like earlier parts of our "schema" are triggered and sort of take over the consciousness. So, part of you would like the...

Effexor is stimulating, the reverse of clonodineand proposing; maybe it’s keeing you up?

Here is an example of a more extreme. I know a lady that had been molested by her father at least once, and as her father was abusive, most likely her older brother was abused too, as he started coming into the room and molesting the lady too. She says, "I remember him coming into the room, the...

I am wondering what it was about the situation in the car that was triggering you; is that significant?

Thanks; well, that seems normal by the way! It's not "crazy", or "weak". I am wondering how old you were when traumatic events occurred? Read up on "Attachment Disorders", if you haven't, ok? Typically, a child will turn the blame onto themselves, because you both have to turn the blame onto...

what is your earliest traumatic experience? Beyond this relationship; is there anything before that? Did you already have any worries about trust, or feelings of abandonment?

what do you do with your anger; internal, and/or external?

OK; now those are interesting ideas. Yeah, I do think that affects "trauma" . That your is duplicitous; a possible evil; possible, well your mother who maybe could be nurturing at times? Well, we all need to eat, and be carnivores. We are indoctrinated into it, and we really don't think about...

Do you dissociate when you are by yourself, and think about the issues; or is it just in the groups? Is it the story line, or emotions that you feel before it starts happening? I am interested in "I feel hot, and it feels like an elephant sitting on my chest, and can't the words to come out...

There are several possibilities. It could be a "sleep disorder", look up Hypnogogic or hypnopompic hallucinations; that is hallucinations, going in and out of wakefulness in going to sleep or waking up. Have you had gaps in time before; missing parts in memories. So, do you know if you...

I knew a lady that would use crayons; colors were more like affect/mood. The darker, say black, the darker the shame/depression, or whatever. Also, say red, could be aggression, and sometimes that would be dark red. Lighter intensity of color, and force may be milder moods, or happy, and so on...

How do you know that it's "four years old"?

This entire thread is one of the best details of dissociations and "maladaptive dreaming" that I've seen.

I am a counselor. I have done some “self hypnosis” and guided imagery. Most of the clients that I counsel have had traumatic background, and therefore often have a dx of “PTSD”. Do you feel that yoga works better than typical self meditation or self hypnosis? Thank you.

well; maybe the music, and house cleaning really keeps us in the moment/mindful. But, I wonder, sometimes if the drama is what we are used to from the past? So, quiet seems weird, and; really, a different neural pathway is beginning. So, stay with it, it does get better. Do you practice guided...

I see. "people are pretty shallow". how so?

I think an interesting book for you is one that I read a while back, "Unchained Memories" by Lenore Terr. It's on repressed memories and such; about a psychiatrist that is an expert witness in court suggesting that memories can come back after many years. They are all case studies; pretty...

I agree about the point "psychology is rather new in it's modern form". Dissociation is one area that some clinicians seem to shy away from, or seem to have some misconception about. It really causes some misdiagnoses too

what are the "flashbacks" like? Are they just memories from the triggering of your seeing the teacher? Are is there anything else coming back. What do you sense in emotion, physical feelings and the like.. anything else going on?

well, they could be both; dissociations and repressed memories. I think it's interesting; "I don't remember anything really happening to me; and that's possible too. You are having some somatic (body) memories maybe, the feeling in orally and in other parts. Also, your body is re-enacting...

I understand not telling your therapist; I mean that was the point, but that's how the therapist can start helping you out. I'm curious, what are you worried about if the therapist knew? how old were you that you remember having these? Also, do you have any seizures?

how long have you been in the state that you have forgotten how to talk; walk and the like?

I was just curious; if you did share it with your boyfriend, what would you ideally want to gain?