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    Rocking back and forth - any rockers here?

    ^^ Yup so me. I do the same thing all the time.
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    Emdr (movie or full out relive?)

    I just did my first session and it was something else. I didn't know what to expect. At first, it started like a movie then it turned to those flashback -type things you see on tv or movies sometimes. It got so real that I seemed to feel the physical parts of my experiences all over again...
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    Childhood Chronic invalidation of feelings

    I would do that. Sometimes you can write things out more clearly than you express verbally. I think your T would appreciate it.
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    Childhood Chronic invalidation of feelings

    We are kindred spirits, you and I. My issues and history are very similar. It's a struggle to cope. I've felt like :poop: one way or another fro most of my life. Wanting validation, only to be criticized/ostracized. Or wanting love because I didn't get a lot growing up and basically getting...
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    Sexual Assault Would you believe me? was it my fault?

    It's not your fault. It's his. He attacked you. You didn't consent to anything, you weren't even asked. He forced himself on you. I believe you. As liz81934 says blaming the victim happens far too often. It's a tactic abusers also use to guarantee silence. By making us feel no one will...
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    Symptom? child-like behavior

    Yeah, I couldn't stop myself. Now I'm searching for a toy I never got a chance to get back then. Unfortunately, it's crazy rare. Fingers crossed.
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    To be "perfect"

    I can relate. I got threatened and/or beat when I got a C on my report card. I literally wanted to die when I knew report cards were coming out. Nothing I did was ever good enough and the family would be 'judged poorly' because of it. My later relationships were similar. Basically I was a...
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    How do you stop overthinking?

    I am the same way. My family thinks I'm weird. But from the way I see it, my traumas occurred mostly because someone said that I did or said something bad. Pretty much for a good portion of my life, everything I said or did was wrong. It was and is crippling, I can't have any interaction...
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    My world just exploded!

    Um, they are enabling her by not enrolling her. I don't know how you put up with them. They are completely lying. I'd pack up her crap and drop her off at their doorstep. She wants help to some extent but can't or won't follow up. That's not enabling, allowing her to go on or providing her...
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    My world just exploded!

    She's manipulating you again. She sees you as an easy mark. If she gets you worried that she has nowhere to go, then you won't make her go. Get her set up at a woman's shelter. Don't give her excuses. That's all they are, excuses. She has biological family that need to step up a little...
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    Childhood Coming To Terms: Mother Daughter Abuse

    It really sucks, I can totally relate. She is great with my kids and not as mean spirited as she used to be. But she still plays the victim. I flat out told my new therapist I don't want to confront/discuss with her, my issues. She won't hear it and gets angry, which traumatizes me more. My...
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    My world just exploded!

    Or at minimum a ride to her own kid's place. She's their headache and they need to deal with it.
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    My world just exploded!

    Good start. Hopefully you won't have to play hardball with them. If they don't respond, tell them that you're dropping her off at x homeless/women's shelter by this date and if they so choose, they can come get her. They are leaving you with the bag and that's wrong. Even your dad (as far as...
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    T wants me to try emdr

    I'm no therapist but I think you did block it but in such a way that it can subconsciously bother/hurt you. Yes, you've put it aside but not 'dealt' with it. Part of you wants to or needs to. If I were to guess. It's like it is deferring it to a kind of stress/pain easier for you to deal...
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    T wants me to try emdr

    I have the same fears. I feel mine is locked in a pressure tank but I just noticed the bleed valve was broke. A little has been leaking out all along but not enough to notice. I thought I had controlled it for years. Mine is from several trauma incidents from child to an adult. I felt really...
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    My world just exploded!

    That sounds like a good course of action. They need to take responsibility for her, not you. If someone has to, other than herself. Why they aren't is beyond me. I would be mad. I'd almost put her in rehab and send the bill to them if they won't help. They have more obligation to her than...
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    My world just exploded!

    Wow, just wow. You can't afford her and you shouldn't be expected to. Maybe check her into a women's shelter. She doesn't seem to be helping you to help her either. Can you talk to your father and ask him what happened, in his own words? I would, as for me all kinds of warning bells are...
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    Trust question for a sufferer?

    I agree. I know I had said and done really hateful things to my partner when I'm triggered. It's horrible. Most times I don't even remember doing it. I would never say or do them in a normal, non-triggered state either. My husband doesn't understand it, however other than through his...
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    T wants me to try emdr

    I realize we are all different, whether it be traumas, personalities, etc. but my T explained it like this ( I was scared) it gives you on opportunity to process it in a constructive way and be able to lock a mental door behind it so it can't hurt you anymore. The trauma will still be there...
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    Therapy tomorrow and i'm scared

    Pretty good. I started crying and needed my comfort item. Things really hurt me to discuss. But I needed to. She says for sure I have it. She didn't want to go on my other therapist's word, which I appreciate. :):tup: She says she wants to do EMDR. She's a trauma therapist and does it...
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    Symptom? child-like behavior

    Sounds pretty similar. I feel like my life got sidetracked and I wasn't really a kid. I guess now I'm getting help and figuring things out, my psyche really wants to be.
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    Comfort items

    Just wanted to thank everyone. I went yesterday for the first time and did bring one. I thought I was being a little silly but I'm glad I had it. I needed it.
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    Sexual Assault Trauma bonding

    Ah, I see. I had a similar situation. You're aren't alone.
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    Awkward silence...arrghhhhh

    I guess I'm spoiled. My T, at least for the this first one, started asking questions and talking. Not just 'tell me how you're feeling right now'. But more like 'what happened? What can you tell me? When did it happen and how old were you?' I was surprised my first therapist was the...
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    Therapist wants me to do emdr

    I agree. She wants to help you and knows who can. She's not 'abandoning ' you ( a fear many, if not most, of us have) or giving up. She just knows that someone can help you in ways that she can't.
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