Emerg Services Police Vet With 19 Years 4 Months With Ptsd Ia Hearing Tomorrow

[David342]

Hi everyone,

I am a 19 year police veteran in North Carolina. I was diagnosed with ptsd in May 2016. I have an Internal Affairs hearing tomorrow for neglect of duty and unfit for duty.

 

[scout86]

Welcome to the forum.

What's likely to happen at the hearing tomorrow? (Hoping for the best for you!)

 

[David342]

Thank you....I will sit at the end of a long table with a Major, Captain, and sargeants. I will get cited for termination. I told the police psychologist that i couldn't do police work anymore and i didn't want to come back. I have been on paid leave since may 6th,2016. I spent a week in a mental hospital for suicidal thoughts and they diagnosed me with ptsd

 

[scout86]

That was one of those posts where I debate whether I should "like" it or not....

This sounds like it will be a huge change for you, after devoting so much of your life to this career. I hope this goes down in a way that doesn't reflect badly on you. Getting PTSD is no more your fault than having a career ending injury from a physical confrontation is. I hope they understand that. Any idea what you're going to do now?

 

[David342]

This will be a huge change since i have done local LE for nearly 20 years. HR told me that it would be best to get cited because i would be eligible for Short Term Disibility. I cant work when getting that. I also put in for Medical Retirement. The police dont give a shit about mental illness....it's the police culture and you never show weakness.

 

[scout86]

A good friend of mine retired from the military under similar circumstances and it's a similar culture. :( It's too bad, because I think a lot of good people get kicked to the curb when they still have a lot of offer.

Are you in therapy?

 

[David342]

Very true in regards to similar culture and being kicked to curb. When i left the hospital i was placed in a Partial Hospitalization Program and that ends wednesday.

 

[David342]

My psychiatrist in the program was an army psychiatrist served in Iraq, then worked at Walter Reed and then worked for the VA. He has lots of experience with ptsd.

 

[scout86]

I'd like to suggest you find a good therapist who's got some experience with people from your line of work. It can make a huge difference. I wasted a lot of years telling myself I didn't need any help. Really wasted them. Please don't do that.

I hope you find some help and support around the forum. It's been kind of weird, but very helpful, to find that there are actually a lot of people who's version of reality looks a lot like mine. LOL There are a number of members who are former law enforcement.

Just read your last post. I was thinking earlier about recommending a book and a TED talk by Dr. Charles Hoge. He was an Army psychiatrist who served in Iraq etc. Now he's in private practice in Virginia, I think.

 

[David342]

My new therapist and psychiatrist don't specialize in ptsd...seeing them the end of then week. If I lived closer to Fort Bragg and Fort Jackson i could probably get one that does ptsd.

 

[scout86]

My therapist doesn't specialize in it either, but he's worked with a lot of people who have it and has kind of an interest in it. I live in a pretty rural area, so most therapists are generalists. I was probably ridiculously lucky to contact a guy who actually knows what he's doing on the first try.

 

[David342]

I'd like to suggest you find a good therapist who's got some experience with people from your line of w...

They couldn't even locate a phd or md that did ptsd...let a lone LE ptsd. My father in law has ptsd from vietnam..i can relate with him. I think all police and military can realte one way or another