Checked out!

[mamachick]

When I was first diagnosed with ptsd ( 2 yrs after a complicated head injury), I had nightmares, general anxiety, panic attacks, depression. I continued to stay busy but was jumpy and agitated. I felt like I was spinning my wheels and getting nowhere. My low blood pressure became elevated often. Eventually I collapsed, or cracked a couple of time. I was in a panic to get my life back but seemed to have no control. I became exhausted and quit caring about the things I once had passion for. This change didn't happen over night and was a process of me letting go of things little by little.
First it was work, then the house, then family, then social, then exercise and even physical appearance. Now I stare at the wall many hours a day and isolate, but I am not stressed out all day long, for the most part the anxiety and nightmares are gone. I have to coax myself to take a shower or eat. I have mostly been in bed for 3 years. Last week I pulled weeds and couldn't move for days. My massage therapist says I have muscle atrophy.
I just wonder if others have done this and if and how you have pulled yourself out of this state. Im not really depressed, I avoid life and disappointments. I expect little so Im content but I know this is not healthy, but it no longer feels like my head is going to blow off.
Also, I can't separate symptoms of ptsd and tbi. I am on a waiting list for a brain injury program which I am hopeful about but the program lost funding for the time being.
Sometimes I don't even feel like I belong here because of the TBI. I welcome any feedback.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

don't even feel like I belong here because of the TBI. I welcome any feedback.

What is TBI

 

[mamachick]

Traumatic brain injury

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Thank you, I think you do belong here, I am sorry to hear about the things you are struggling with for now, but I believe these things are temporary. I have my own issues that are similar to what you are now experiencing but I am also very stressed out with crises situations. It sounds like you are managing the best you are able to at this time. Do you feel depressed?

 

[Fadeaway]

My husband had a lot of success with arnica for his TBI from his auto accident. However, I am going to put a huge disclaimer on this as it can make you ill if not taken properly or you take it in the wrong form.

Arnica helps reduce the swelling in the brain and is recomend for healing TBI. There was a huge difference day to day and even hour to hour when my husband took and and when he didn't. It is usually used topically but you can buy homepathic pills in health food or vitamin stores. It can cause stomach issues though. It is worth a shot but discuss it with a professional first and research it first.

As for pulling yourself out of depression, some ideas would be to go somewhere you have never been before. A change of scenery, something fun like checking out little boutiques. Buy your self something you normally wouldn't. Check out meetup.dot com see if they have any free yoga or meditation groups. Maybe buy some hand held weights just to get you muscles active again.

 

[desiderata310]

I can't separate symptoms of ptsd and tbi.

What I have discovered with my own TBI issues is that one feeds the other feeds the other.
I get furiously frustrated trying to separate them out day by day and hour by hour.
Hell, I just get frustrated.

Yes, I've atrophied a bit. Depression for me along with everything else is a hell of a thing.
Walking helps. Helps with balance too.
Setting reminders on my phone to do things like take a shower, eat etc those help.
It sets a rhythm to the day. It makes it easier.
The dog is great for breaking up the routine as well as he needs letting out every two hours.
Setting goals and writing them down.-little things at first- those help as well.
Writing here helps as well.

It's not uncommon to find TBI and PTSD comorbid.

You're welcome here.

 

[mamachick]

Its like I get mentally paralyzed and can't make myself move to meet the smallest of goals. Its even become hard to take care of my dogs. I feel like a winer when I complain so I have just shut up and sucked it up. Im sorry to be complaining when I know so many have it so much worse.

 

[Ronin]

If it helps you any @brat17, others complain about waay more unimportant things, in way better situations, than yours.

Others' troubles aren't a yardstick to measure by.

 

[mamachick]

Rain, I use to operate under crisis but I have eliminated all crisis from my life. You asked if I feel depressed? I know that I must be but I have accepted this as my new normal I suppose, so I don't really feel depressed.

Fadeaway I didn't know arnica helped the brain. I think I took that (surgeon ordered) for few wks prior to surgery because of its healing effect. I will have to check this out further. Unfortunately I back out of plans that require leaving the house. I might be a bit agoraphobic. It causes anxiety though I do push through a little bit.

desiderata-I was so frustrated that I was bitchy to others...and a couple years ago I just quit trying to figure it out and accept it as it is. That may not be a good thing. My anger is gone but so is every other emotion. I feel like a zombie. Its as though I gave up unintentionally. Its like I have gone from a responsible competent over achiever who rarely sat down to a stupid lazy person. Im sure people do think I am lazy now and I did everything until a couple years ago.(I was down to 90 pounds and dr gave me adderoll for years to stay awake) Without it I can't function, yet I hated the false feeling of energy.

Ronin I know you are right and I would be better off not comparing with others. Thank you for reminding me.

Sorry it took so long to respond....I just can't even think at times. I am just blank!