Recent content by crystaltear

OMG YES. I couldn't have explained it better. I don't go off somewhere, it's more like the conscious me is slightly out of sync with the rest of me & I can't access my emotions or think clearly. I just realised that I have been bouncing between 4 "alts" all day. Each time in convinced it's the...

I think you'll find this site extremely beneficial, I definitely am :). All the best on your healing journey, I'm here if you need a sounding board.

I get this too. It's so awful. I'd rather be bawling my eyes out from a broken heart than feeling stuck in some 4th dimension. Ive found it tends to happen to me when I have (subconsciously or maybe consciously) distanced myself from my true feelings. Sometimes I dig around until I can feel...

I have an online blog where I tend to straddle the line of "honest but well polished." Lately I have been feeling more and more urge to be super real about my PTSD. I want to write about the feelings, the thoughts, and yes, what caused it. Forcing myself to think back to the abuse I suffered...

You're welcome! Let us know how you go :)

It is for sure an uphill battle. Don't give up. You're worth it. x

Oh my God. I'm glad you're out of there. Being called a liar in such a serious context must have felt so horrible, and frustrating. Reminds me of these reoccurring nightmares I have of everybody suddenly turning on me for no good reason, its the worst feeling.

Oh hun, that sounds so awful. Just breathe. Slowly & deeply, through your nose, making sure the breathe makes your stomach rise. You are safe. You will be okay. You are not out of control. He can not and will not ruin you. You are strong, valuable and downright amazing. It was just a...

That's f*cking awful how they treated you. They took advantage of you, avoided treating you with basic human decency and respect, and then victim blamed you when you were going through (I'm guessing) one of the hardest times of your life. That f*cking sucks, I'm so sorry that happened. What dicks.

I've never talked about this before ever. But YES. I am messed up in this area for sure. You are not alone. The idea of being raped by a man a lot older than me turns me on more than any healthy, positive emotions or even seeing/ being with/ imagining someone I'm really attracted to and/or care...

I'm really sorry that you've been dealt a shitty card in life and that you've obviously met some pretty awful people in your time. There are some truly messed up individuals out there who seem to inflict pain everywhere they go. BUT there are good ones out there too. No perfect ones. None that...

Hey Esha, I'm sorry you feel so crappy at the moment. :( I also would love to fall in love with someone one day who accepts me for who I am, and is there for me whether Im having a great day or a horrible one. I've only experienced painful, unhealthy romantic relationships so far, but I think...

Sounds a bit like perfectionism to me. I struggle with this A LOT. I have high standards for myself (well they wouldn't seem so high if i wasn't struggling with PTSD) and I feel crappy and guilty when I don't meet them. Like I've failed, and the failure somehow is a reflection of who I am as a...

Wow. That sounds like a pretty terrifying experience, as well as a really unusual one. I've never hallucinated (well that I can currently remember) but I am no stranger to panic attacks. They are pretty much one of the worst experiences in the world. As a Neuropsych grad, I'm super intrigued by...

Very much YES. I feel like m whole body is vibrating and that it's originating in my core (my lower gut). It feels at times like pressure is building up and needs to escape and that it's going to kill me if I don't figure out how to stop it. It's awful. The feeling started a couple weeks before...