Recent content by Resilientbibliophile

Welcome to the forum...

Greetings... Not sure if it will strictly help, but within the last week I'd finished reading sort of a rewrite and elaboration on Dorthy Tennov's Love and Limerence: The Experience of Being in Love from 1979 titled Smitten: Romantic obsession, the neuroscience of limerence, and how to make...

Greetings... At mercy of the same basic dynamic here; i.e. various memories of interpersonal disempowerment 'on shuffle' within my head, whereas without much conscious input from myself, I time travel back to the time, back to the moment and role play much more aggressive defensive strategies...

Trying to keep this reply short - always a struggle this. Staged and carefully calibrated reveals with regards to one's personal history consistent with maintaining reasoned boundaries versus suddenly divulging core trauma that predictable overwhelms a listener seems best. Alienating people...

Thanks for your detailed reply and interest expressed, whereas I suppose what's recorded below constitutes Part II of my tale of invisibility: Just mulling things and for recent reading of what might be termed social aggressive/bullying literature as it relates to secondary school experiences...

Not intended to trivialize or harm this, just some reflections based upon how I very imperfectly cope... Worse in previous years whereby it was almost like time travel where I'd pick up some moment in time where the dynamic was off between myself and another or group of those seemingly allied...

Maybe not the same thing here, although with my father it seems he didn't want a third child when I arrived, while I suspect there was hot debate between him and my mother to the extent of what he might contribute in the form of care should my mother carry me to term. What resulted was...

Well, as a positive, structural changes baked in and just across the horizon are going to avail you the ability to place distance between yourself and your parents and all legacies suggested, radiating from, and in a manner of speaking - waiting to be explored - albeit just not right now. Not...

Greetings and no claim to ultimate authority as I write this... Similar profile here in relation to CPTSD, disassociation, a deep reluctance if you will to engage others in public (and work) environments where I just feel wholly uncompetitive and too dysfunctional to hide or mask my despair for...

Greetings... Regret that others negotiate life with similar profiles and implied hinderances, unfortunately very familiar with the experience of CPTSD, hypervigilance and boundary issues, disinterest ranging towards contempt of family (mostly disinterest given I seem - seem - to be...

Variations on a theme here... It's very possible to register fatigue in relation to maintaining a societally venerated poise consistent with extolling the worth of service, of sacrifice, of giving all without complaint. Past public and academic librarian here, whereas it helped (in measure) to...

Sorry - I'll try to keep this short... A touch angry, but mostly embarrassed given what would appear my appalling lack of discrimination with regards to the people I let into my life. One estranged friend died earlier this week after largely losing control of his life and failing utterly with...

...forgive me if I've misunderstood the question. For myself as of late I've imagined the best qualities of a potential life mate and have taken a pen and paper which I scribble atop the question 'What's wrong?'. In essence I'm setting up an emotional support blow up doll of a sort, not...

If it helps, I found it of value to review what would be understood as an elaboration on the fight or flight response as articulated by Pete Walker. Something added to the mix is neither fight or flight, but rather 'fawn'; i.e. to freeze in place hoping if you will for the threat to dissipate...