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DO any of you go to a gym? I go to one. It has three branches. After all my trauma and head injuries it is hard to be there now because they started music. They had one branch that was free of it. It is loud and obnoxious and relentless. I wrote them a humiliating letter about trauma and head...

I am so perplexed. Several year ago, life went on a tear for me. You know how it is. PTSD does not mean OTHER things will not happen. Like illness, accidents, etc....... I was under so much stress that I started to have conversations in my head with certain people. Here is the way it happened...

Hi. For those who are following my car accident, well, I started to have trouble remembering faces and got lost all the time and headaches from hell and memory issues and all sorts of things. Finally saw Dr who said I have TBI. Neurocog testing next. I feel bad. I needed my brain. I am...

Something odd has happened to me. If you have been following my threads, here is back story. A LOT of early trauma and abuse, displacement, illnesses and disability. (i.e. my life has been hell) In Jan I had a serious car accident with lots of injuries, and some to the face. These resulted in...

For those who have been following my posts, you know on the 11th things got really bad and I almost checked out. Then I wandered around in a daze Tues and Wed. asking God for even one kind soul to help me. He sent me St Augustine who is beseaching the violated women not to kill themselves...

I had PTSD before my accident. It was very bad from abuse. PTSD is always bad regardless. I had a wreck 6 months ago. It caused some nerve damage in my face. It has gotten worse and it can;t be helped too much. Trigeminal neuralgia on on top of PTSD. I really cannot go on and I don't know...

I really had a hard time a few days ago. I was very suicidal and was locked in my closet with the means for two hours. That is when I called all those lines and got chewed out but kept persisting etc because I want to be here. Anyway, someone said to me, "Let nature decide" and it was like a...

I do not understand . I dress in a protective way. I always wear a knit cap etc. Always comfort clothes. Yesterday I went to a familar place and did not have it on and dressed normal for a function and it was crushing me. I felt so unprotected and the people who knew me were all over it...

I called the local line today. The lady knew me so she was mad. She started to chew me out about how I am not telling anyone that I am in need etc. "How can they HELP YOU if you don't ASK FOR HELP?" Yelling and talking over me. She has no idea the depth of my suffering and how people run...

You know Fantasy Football? Well, it has dawned on me. I keep having a series of fantasy relationships Does anyone else do this? It dawned on me after my friend w her "crush" and I was thinking. I have these fantasies with people who I know and they are kindly to me and all.......but nothing...

I have heard some of us love fiction to escape and others of us like straight up reality science or history or other non fiction. Which do you find helps? For me, it is history which tells me how things really are. I feel like fiction deceives me but I am open to the escape if someone wants to...

Two years ago i had no place to go because I had to leave my home. I stayed with a friend but almost started to beg because I was not making it. I am at that place again. I have a home, but I cannot work. It is funny to me that I have SO much shame but not about begging. I don't know why I...

I have a question about stalking. My best friend is obsessed with a man she met at Starbucks. He works there and she goes there every single day to "study". She asked me if she is stalking him. I said NO because she never even TALKS to him!! She said she feels safe there because I guess she...

Since Jan in terrible pain. Lost a lot of weight and could not go. Now the throbbing is bad and in more of the jaw. I think I f&cked up. Going tomorrow. Will reprt

My story was on the news so people who know me, all they have to do is poke in my name and there it all is. This makes me very sad. I can always tell when people find it because they act differently toward me. One of my friends just kept tearing up around me and finally confessed she had...

I was born with a disability, so when I got PTSD, it was hard enough. The Disability is not an easy one, so the PTSD made things worse. THEN I got medical troubles and an accident and I have about had it. So here I am . I have no plans but why do I think about suicide so much? See how much I...

My PTSD is not combat related but I cannot do fireworks. It is so loud and unnerving that I cannot go. ALSO, it reminds me of when I was happy, some time long ago that I can't really remember. It just pisses me off. I know the fireworks threads are always up this time of year and hugs to all...

I used to isolate a lot. But now I don't. Now I have to be around people even if they are strangers! When I come home, here I am and it makes me feel really scared. Does anyone else have this? To me, it feels kind of good now to be around people so I think it may be healing but then again...

Feeling quite sad today. I have had PTSD a long time from many things. Today I just feel so sad and empty and alone. I have stopped faking. I am publically aching because I cannot NOT do it anymore. I just hope to feel connected to someone out there. You guys know how it feels, like your soul...

As I posted before I am recovering from a car wreck. I already had complex PSTD from a lot of abuse. Anyway, a lady was texting and hit me at 55mph and caused a lot of injuries. Right before impact, I thought of so many things. But the one thing that stuck with me was, "FINALLY!" because I...

I was hit by someone who was texting. My leg, my foot, my lung, my eyes and side were hurt badly. Still in PT. The lung capacity is still low. I can only blow a 250 in peak flow still. However, one of the injuries may be disfiguring as time passes. It makes me wonder why I survived. I have...

In the last 3 months, i have destroyed three good pans. I mean so bad, the smoke in the house was bad for days. I have memory issues, but am memorizing a very long poem, so I am confused. I have even burnt tea. I put it on and then forget! When I leave the house, I unplug everything now to be...

I also deal with this. Or do not deal with it. In 2011, I lost the ability to sleep. It turns out I had a lot of arsenic in my body on top of the PTSD. At any rate, I have never gotten it back. I was rehab myself before they opened a 24 hr a day mine behind my home. Then it was another year...

I have a friend who I used to date before I had PTSD. He is so kind to me, but I have been through other relationships I could not keep because of the PTSD and other issues. He, too, was abused though as a child. Very sad, but he has gotten to a place where he is more stable. He is very loving...

Hello- I have recently been brave enough to post some You Tube videos. It's been hard because I have always felt so insignificant and worthless since the PTSD. The massive amounts of shame..... My friend saw it and commented that I do not look good on videos, that I am much better in person...