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Today, I told T that my sexual fantasies are f*cked up and part of my self harm. I’ve talked around this for years, but I laid it ALL out on the table. Even worse yet, I told her that I trust her and asked her, “when the hell did this happen?” She was all genuine smiles today. At the end she...

I would use this time to find something else that helps you. I think that Dramamine works better than Xanax for me. Look into trileptal or lamictal. I take mine at night for my anxiety. It acts as a sedative. I also take daily walks. ;-)

I have a list of tools in the corner pocket in my purse. My T says the hardest part is to remember that I have the list when I go “offline.” Anxiety: nature, exercise, clean house, avoid people, paint Depression: make myself do at least one thing. Take a drive. Sit Outside. I try not to...

Do you have a therapist? I find that my therapist has helped me a lot in sorting this kind of relationship stuff out. One time she told me, “people get mad at people that get cancer. It’s not right, but it happens.” Ptsd is hard for everyone.

My therapist once told me to imagine a confident person or me when I’m in my A-game. Sit the way that person would sit. When I did that, I could feel the difference. Fake it to make it. I also carry something in my hand like a shell or rock that is part smooth and part rough. I feel that...

I’m guessing that moving closer to work is out of the question.

Each time a new flashback or memory emerged from my hidden childhood, I would be a mess for a few weeks. My therapist would give me an empathetic, “new information?” I was frozen and couldn’t speak. It can be like a chain reaction of bad stuff.

It seems so pointless for you to go in if everything is done online anyways. That must be beyond frustrating. I wouldn’t worry about the two months in asking for the flex program. They can always say no, but might say yes. The program wouldn’t exist unless it had some value to the company.

Never thought about the oral triggers—which could be a big possibility. I was mainly getting this rush of edgy fear feeling along with that anxiety skin feeling about an hour after taking the nasal spray.

Has anyone had a surge of anxiety mid day after taking Flonase nasal spray?

Thank you for this post.

I see a lot of faces and people. Running or falling. Being piled together.

Maybe this is how it goes? Relational therapy is somewhat “relational?” I guess the real question is what your viewpoint on therapy is. Let’s pretend you are investing in a personal trainer. Do you want that to be life long? There is always something humans can work on. However, you may...

I had this type of discussion with my therapist today. I asked her what it would look like if she retired. I have pretty intense abandonment issues that we are always working on. She said that some therapists out there completely close the door at termination. She doesn’t do that. She plans...

It’s kind of a trait of insecure attachment. (And maybe bpd?)

When I first started emdr, it stirred too much up in me. I became extremely disregulated. Once she figured out what was happening, I got discovered as having complex ptsd. It changed the game plan. We do flash emdr to lower my SUDS before doing traditional emdr. Don’t forget to pace...

I’ve done a ton of research on signs of child abuse and age appropriate behaviors. My T tells me that it isn’t our job to figure out whether it happened or not because the feelings are there. So we work on healing from that.

Have any of you had messed up, heavy, clotty periods after the vaccine. I’ve heard that this happens and tends to resolve in a few months. I’m mostly just concerned for my 18 year old daughter. She also started birth control that does a period every three months. Very clotty. Not sure if...

I tend to fall into: there is so much worse it could have been. I’m exaggerating. My system is just too sensitive. This stuff didn’t matter much or stick out until my hormones went bonkers. It didn’t happen.

My adult part doesn’t think it was their fault. But they are part of me and fully blame themselves. It’s a very strong feeling, too. I do like seeing that some people on here have come through to the other side of believing they that it wasn’t their fault. It gives me hope.

I was reading all of your responses and started to feel that panic/can’t breathe feeling I get in therapy when we talk about this stuff. I would never think rape or grooming was the fault of the survivor, but I have parts of myself that are stuck there. I think that maybe that is why my T is...

Living on a sailboat would cause me anxiety—lol. I’m guessing that is not your case. Maybe it takes time for your med to work itself out of your system? What kind was it?

I have a wonderful extended family. However, the stressor on my nervous system can be unbearable. In therapy, we work on coping and nervous system calm downs for these events. My triggers are different. For example, the jingle of my husband’s belt used to cause my heart to race and panic...

Has anyone gotten past a belief that CSA or adult rape was their fault? How do you do that? My T says that whether something was my fault or not, I still deserve emotional care. My mind is spinning on that as well.

I get the “erotically charged” comment. Even working on csa and rape can cause it. I researched this extensively because I found it so disgusting and shameful and read that it’s a normal body reaction. I occasionally bring up sex with my T. She uses professional terminology and it creates a...