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I have made the decision to decline all family celebration invites this year. My family caused my PTSD, mostly my mother, and I have decided that ruining my holidays by subjecting myself to further abuse (emotional at this point) to fulfill some perceived social obligation is unacceptable. I...

My PTSD symptoms are very similar to yours so I know that feeling of paranoia and the feeling of being 'punished' or being a 'bad person' and that everyone is against you because of it. There is no convincing you in that moment that it isn't true. I know what it is like. I really hope that you...

Wow - this has been an amazing thread. I was going to ask basically the same question when I spotted that someone had already asked it. I have been thinking of changing just my first name. I have my husband's last name(who I love very much and want to be identified with) and I gave one of my...

I may get the 'boo, hiss' on my comment here, but I feel a little differently than most of the answers. I say gently and carefully get it out in the open now. If you take time, build trust, get invested in a relationship, THEN tell her and she can't handle it, there will be more painful...

I needed to hear that - thank you Snowwhite - I had someone 'pressure' me into sexual things and while the person didn't beat me, he did pressure me and he did use his own strength to kind of 'push' me. I have been disbelieved because he didn't beat the h*** out of me or something so no one...

Not to be rude - but who are you to judge others traumas? Just because yours was different does not make ours or anyones less of a trauma to them - you are a danger to the safety of this site and the people who need a safe place to share their burden.

I am a little concerned that someone was so quick to suggest that anyone here is doesn't belong here and should go start another forum - kind of 'not safe' sign - just makes me a little uneasy about sharing here if people feel like that if I am 'not like' them then I should not be here - because...

I would be glad to read it for you and offer feedback. I am not an author but I do a lot of reading and could probably offer constructive feedback.

Religion ( misinterpretation of scripture) played a huge role in my traumas - not in any way that I could 'check' off in the poll but in ways that were a form of emotional abuse by my mother. She is a 'hard-core' Christian - who believes that her job in life is to call out 'sins' and try to...

I could so very much relate to your feelings - all of them - especially the ones about still wanting/needing to find that love and acceptance from her. I have struggled with that all of my life - for many of the same reasons that you have written about. I won't go into my issues here because...

If you are in the US and you get on disability I believe - could be wrong but I think you can get Medicaid or Medicare along with it - might be something to look into .

There are those who both work and receive disability payments. My husband is one of those people - in our state you can have disability but also have a limited level of income - thus being both disabled but being able to earn a small income. It is based on the understanding that while a person...

Even a divorce that is wanted (mine was) is a tearing away and is emotional - it is okay to feel that - and to feel relief and happiness at the same time - we can't choose what we feel only how we handle it - congratulations on your freedom.

Wow - all of you guys are so creative - and angel2write - I looooooooooooooove the dolls - and see so many therapeutic possibilities in them! Awesome

Wow - wish I could answer that question - my traumas began so soon after birth that I don't really know. I was also basically 'trained' to be the person I am by an unrelenting taskmaster and have no idea who the real 'me' is or what she is like.

Hang in there Sharky - you can make it - you are not destroyed even though it feels like it - just focus on making your way home - and you will be fine - *hugs*

Oh my Starlite - that is a shocking bit of news for you. Try to take time to breathe - even with this you have time to calm yourself and think it through once the shock of it wears off a little. And as horrible as it is to have conceived through a rape- maybe you are not being punished but being...

It's kind of awesome that there is something 'good' that you can see as coming out of your trauma! I hope to someday be able to pull something like that out of mine.

While I do not have any wise words - I do want to say that I so relate to your story - be kind to yourself and enjoy your safety! I have been unable to completely sever the ties to my mother - so I admire you for having been able to do so !

People have to deal with these things in their own way. If that is what works for you then that is what you have to do - but I would caution you that you could be missing out on some great friendships with some wonderful people by excluding the entire female population! Peace!

I too understand this feeling, my mother continued to associate with my abuser (she was one of them but there was another) and not only that but continued to take me as a small child to the house where he lived even after she knew the abuse had happened - I had to see this man every holiday and...

I am so upset and anxious - trying not to go full blown panic - I have had a bad time all week - trembling started on Sunday evening and has lasted constantly since then without a moment of peace - been trying to calm myself with every method I have ever had work - and none of them have worked -...

oh okay I see - why would someone want to do that in a place like this ? How cruel that is - guess that is the world we live in - so sad. Thanks for explaining - sorry for the dumb question.

I keep seeing the term 'trolls' on the website and just wonder - what are 'trolls'?

Thanks Kwan - no real go-to plan - just kind of do the best I can.