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My last few years, I intentionally, perhaps not wisely, have cared for each of my divorced parents, my Mom with Lewy Body and my Dad with Parkinsons and cancer. As much as I have tried to murder it, I can’t watch people I care about suffer. This position of closeness with my parents has caused...

I’m not a doctor by any means but do have some experience with some of the meds you list. Sertraline is not addictive. It is however a drug that should not be stopped abruptly and takes a while to take full effect. 50mg is a very low dose and I would say less than therapeutic for most people. I...

Wow, I really relate to this, although my family was, has been and always will be the epitome of danger I seem unable to escape in everyone else. Last night, I weeded the final family member, my mother. The past 2 years cohabitating has reunited me with my young self, neglected, abused and...

I really relate to the listening to others, only to end up in a worse position. I am sorry and I feel you. Your post reached me today and that is no easy task. I am grateful. It is in my listening to others, rather than making a definitive solo decision that has displaced me again and again...

It’s groundhog day and I’m wondering if others experienced something similar? My life within ptsd took on a temporariness seemingly beyond my control. At first I resisted pulling up roots in spite of significant financial and relational problems. But, eventually it felt good to let go and...

It seems to never stop…. Somewhat settled in a new home, or so I thought, the crumble of my life has not quite completed. I must stand back in faith, honoring a process that remains beyond my comprehension. I couldn’t put words to my experiences, unable to define a perpetual barrage of attacks...

I lost several years after the assaults and still haven't regained a normal relationship with time. Years are like months, months like days and it seems the sun goes down the moment I wake. It is this disassociation that remains the most frightening about my journey

I totally relate as well and really agree with osiris. For me self harm is the release that prevents me from going further with SI. It gives me a relief I know many don't understand but it is the best decision in the moment. be kind to you!

I was allowed and spoke openly about our love affair (me 6/him 20). I was a parched soul in a desert and his fairytale, so hook, line and sinker, I never questioned it as mutual love until the aftermath of the assaults that happened in my early 40's. The reality that the family saw him come and...

I understand time loss too well and while the chunks lost are way shorter than the many years when I first realized it, I still find it frightening. Having an episode now that comes and goes, and during therapy last night I didn’t feel my TX got me. But then again would I be present enough to...

This is one of the benefits of ptsd for me. 5 years ago I packed my car with my pets and hit the road. Yesterday was the last truck load, which for the first time since, gathered my belongings at a home base. I am as agitated as hopeful, once again seeking roots that remain just outside my...

I expected to be all fired up and expressive as the days move along. But, I feel numb, avoidant and am slowly but surely fastening my space suit so I can exist outside of this atmosphere. I leave effectively and completely. There is no one to notice, still. I feared focusing on gathering the...

I am pleased more studies are being done to find the relationship between mental and physical illness and agree with the correlation, just not necessarily in that order, The reverse is equally true, infection increases risk of ptsd. Chicken and the egg... I in no way critique you, but there's...

This makes sense but sorry any human being could do such a thing to you. Narcolepsy is auto-immune and toxins would strain your immune system putting it in overdrive. Once stopped your immune system would start to heal. A bit more about my story, it may give ideas or support, in 2006, I...

At the time I asked I was clearer and tonight I am exhausted and foggy at best. If you don't mind, I would like to come back to you when I regain the perspective I had when I asked. Hope that doesn't come off dismissive because I don't feel that way at all.

Yes, the endless grieving it seems. So much loss, more than anything that is what I equate with ptsd. It feels like a train I am trying to stand on the tracks like superman to stop. But then I am reminded I am mere mortal and am run over again. Slammed to the ground, even two days ago, I am...

So, I have the same reaction, both mania and extremely intense dreams. Lexapro and Sertraline are very similar in many ways and I have been on both. Mania induced from SSRI’s was added to the DSM at some point. It took a ridiculously long time for it to be added as many professionals were...

What a beautiful way to re-frame the day. I truly appreciate your post and vulnerability. I relate but wonder if you might elaborate, I would really like to know more. Reading that hits home. It shows me that part of the fear and torture of the day is that in many ways things have not...

I am anxious, maybe even fearful. November 21, well really November 22 very early morning, will be one year since my only suicide attempt. The date drawing closer, especially in my current circumstances, is gnawing at me. I have made plans to be around kind people in an environment totally...

I wanted to address this, even though I am not a doctor ;-) Adderall is definitely prescribed for ADD/ADHD. I do have ADD and take it for that reason. But I also take it for 2 other diagnosis, narcolepsy and mania. I have the reverse reaction to many psychotropics and even over the counter meds...

I find medication to be an extremely loaded issue for most everyone, even those that have never been on psychotropics. My experience is the psychiatrist is everything. I've been with the same one since 2007. He's a great pharmacologist and truly believes mental illness is biochemical and...

I’m not sure I can control it. When I am disassociated, which I call time loss, is when I don’t even know I am gone. It is generally a benign experience for me, not too triggered or reactionary. Having said this, it is the realization in looking back at my disassociation that has shocked me...

This is poignant for me as the one year anniversary of my only attempt draws closer. It is a complicated issue. But not as complicated as friends and family make it out to be. I’ve known several people that have taken their lives over the years. The rhetorical claim that they should have...

I think it is great you filed. I recognize how terrifying this must have been. Hopefully the outcome will end with conviction but regardless of the outcome I trust you will ultimately feel relief that you took such positive action toward speaking the truth. Secretiveness and shame are some of...

I no longer initiate any visits with any family, except during recent life and death circumstances. But my Mom initiates visits with me. Like most here, my family relations are super complicated. Recently my mom came to visit, ended up in the ICU, then my brothers and niece accused me of...