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Usually when I'm having days like this it means I need to take a step back and give myself a whole lot of love and self-care. For me, that usually means letting myself feel bad without beating myself up about it, watching something I enjoy, taking a bath, eating something delicious, etc...

I think it's fine to say that you're struggling with or have some health issues and would like people to pray for you.

Your anger is perfectly natural and perfectly valid (even if it doesn't feel like it). It's telling you that your boundaries are being crossed and you're being disrespected and you need that to change. All you need to say (or write or email, whatever works for you) is some variation of "This is...

I deserve to have my boundaries respected. I deserve to enforce my boundaries and respect and take care of myself without fear, guilt or shame. I deserve to feel good.

Blueberry pancakes are delicious but if you add bananas to them, they become even more delicious. Topped with maple syrup of course! For a main, you could always try crepes with broccoli and cheddar (so yummy and easy!) or chicken and asparagus in sauce.

@Avellana, I think it is a pretty brave and remarkable thing to acknowledge your care for someone but also to acknowledge that what you need and what they are able to provide you with don't match. Good for you for knowing what you need and prioritizing that. I have similar issues regarding...

I think you logic is dead-on. Basically, you took him at his word. How could that be a bad thing? But apparently what he said and what he wanted were actually two different things and instead of realizing, "Hey, if I want X, I have to say I want X instead of saying I want Y," he's lashing out at...

I've had similar issues with authority figures, asking for help and being vulnerable. One of the things that helped me was to think of asking for help as an empowering act. When I ask for the help I want and need, that actually *gives* me power and control (by enabling me to do the things I want...

@mytai, I'm not sure if your CMHA has this or not, but I've heard about crisis beds at CMHAs for when someone needs a safe bed at night. If you're feeling up to using the crisis line, they should be able to let you know or if I know the vicinity you're in, I could try to google it or even ask my...

Is there anything that we can do that could be of help to you? Are there any coping mechanisms you have that might help shut down your brain temporarily? I realize that might sound funny, but when big, terrible things have happened to me and I haven't felt able to deal with them, sometimes I...

I'm really glad that your T sent someone to you, @mytai. I'm really glad you're still here right now.

Even if the worst happened and he didn't call you again or want to be in a relationship, you didn't "wreck everything". I do think it would probably help both of you though, to communicate a little more effectively. Instead of an explanation after the fact and passive-aggressive swipe at you...

You don't have to respond to anyone, @mytai, but please do feel free to share anything you want to. Sometimes it really does help to share our grief and pain, especially with people who understand. @mytai, when you say "go", do you mean what I think you mean? Is there anyone you trust and...

@mytai, this isn't your failure at all. It's the failure of the police to do the job they exist to do (serve and protect citizens like yourself) and of your uncle. You have not failed. You did everything you were supposed to do. You went above and beyond. You didn't deserve any of this and I am...

I can understand you reaching your limit and deciding to end your friendship, but I can't imagine a goodbye letter/lecture/the dredging up of old wrongs and hurts being done within a week of someone's partner committing suicide. That is honestly unfathomable to me.

@nerdyni, how long have you lived in Canada? Do you have a provincial health card? If you do, I think you may be able to access free therapy through mental health services at your nearest hospital, through a community health center (depending on your income bracket), or via the Canadian Mental...

I think it might help to reframe a few things. It's not that you're insignificant, it's that the counselors aren't as on the ball as they claim to be and as you need them to be. This counselor didn't reject you but she did poorly manage her time and double book an appointment. She didn't...

To be quite honest, I think marijuana is or can be a tool like anything else. A tool can be useful or useless depending on the circumstances. I really question the notion of marijuana as a "gateway" drug - I know plenty of people who've exclusively smoked marijuana, people who do nothing but...

Can you ask your T for help/direction in applying for disability benefits and/or assisted living/subsidized housing? Was it stupid and irrational for you to stay at the group home as long as you did? I guess I'm assuming, perhaps incorrectly, that the reason you chose to stay at the group home...

What is the difference when both involve unwanted exposure to a sexual act? "Teenage years" isn't an excuse to ignore other people's boundaries and if it is normal to ignore consent or lack thereof, then it really shouldn't be.

@anthony, if I'm understanding what you wrote correctly, these men were attempting to masturbate in relative privacy ("around the corner"). If I am reading and understanding you correctly, that's a rather different beast than this one. First, they're men. Second, in the army. Third, they're...

More often than not, I think people who behave abusively do so because they haven't learned how to manage their stresses, their impulses and/or their feelings and they lash out at others in order to alleviate their suffering. For myself, it's more shame and guilt than humiliation. I have to...

I think you just explained exactly why things are getting worse for you - you're back at home where your trauma happened, with the people who traumatized you. I also think it's pretty wise of you to realize that this is not the time to dive into EMDR. You need to be safe and you're not safe...

I wonder if now, in a presumably more adult mindset, you can see that maybe your aunt and grandma were having their own stress responses to your stress responses? Reading your examples, it reminded me of when I was a child and once ran across the road during a red light. When my mother caught up...

I say this as someone who belongs to a group: We're there for a reason, because we have issues of our own. I would consider both of these comments manifestations of her own issues. It's not about you, it's about her. And it sucks that she said both of those things. It would rub me the wrong way...