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Search results

  1. W

    Putting on “work” clothes

    Dear @blackemerald1 thank you so much for writing and responding.... I can’t fully express just how much this made my day! It’s almost midnight and I still couldn’t sleep (after a panick attack that lasted several hours)... you are so right! Right down to the fact that my boss did say something...
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    Reconnecting to learning – understanding the traumatised child (trauma sensitive pedagogies in Australian education))

    Recently, I took a workshop on the impact of childhood trauma on learning for teaching. I just stepped out of teaching in the US. It was a good workshop because it helped me to see how traumatized kids may react to anything other than a kind, soft spoken teacher. There are many more students now...
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    Putting on “work” clothes

    I am writing on here because I need someone to talk to but have no one to call or sit with in person. Thank you for listening... I have been diagnosed with ptsd and in treatment (although my T has been away for over a month now - I’m waiting for her to get back at the end of August). I started...
  4. W

    Depression Feels Like a Cage

    I’ve come to believe that introspective people are prone to bouts of depression when we feel like life is no longer livable. It’s hard to live upbeat when the things that make others happy, one finds meaningless. I used business to outrun ptsd, which I didn’t know I had at the time. I was very...
  5. W

    Doubts about starting a relationship

    @PreciousChild you are lucky that you found someone. The more I consider the whole dating thing, the more I realize that I am averse to male private parts. It is possibly something that will never go away. I guess I am just thinking aloud here and not really trying to justify anything... I’m...
  6. W

    Doubts about starting a relationship

    For someone with ptsd, it is extra horrendous... I will only contact the police if he reaches out again. I don’t want to poke the bear, and I have my sons living with me. I am resting and it feels good.
  7. W

    Doubts about starting a relationship

    An update... I went on my first date in nearly 2 yrs with someone on the online dating site. He was pushy and sexually aggressive. He was lewd. He talked fast like he was on some drug. Like an idiot, I had told him my real name, and he came into the date with information about my current and...
  8. W

    Anxiety/Fear when thinking about work

    @BlueBerry6999 mental health has been an issue for me since 11. I went through many issues and saw therapists on and off. It got so bad that I was hospitalized twice and even went through eletroshock therapy (which is actually worse than it sounds because it helped for a bit.) Without help I was...
  9. W

    Anxiety/Fear when thinking about work

    @BlueBerry6999 this year I took off the last month of my job as sick leave. 3 of those week, I attended an intensive therapy program, where they taught coping skills for trauma. It’s been 7-8 years since my ptsd flared up, but recently is the first time I got help for it. Furthermore, I was...
  10. W

    Anxiety/Fear when thinking about work

    @BlueBerry6999 I really understand this anxiety. I have a tendency to be very critical of myself and try to avoid criticism from others at all costs. It’s coming from my childhood, where I had to do things really well or risk being completely ignored by my mom and stepdad. I felt like my only...
  11. W

    Testing the waters of relationships - and bolting

    @Gentle Blue Sea we have that in common - on an off I wanted to be a Buddhist nun. It took this far to piece together how I wanted to avoid physical relationships. I tried to be with women too. I couldn’t. It’s not the gender - it’s any sex, basically. I just can’t do it. Thank you for your...
  12. W

    Testing the waters of relationships - and bolting

    I have been single for nearly 2 years and diagnosed with ptsd over a year ago. Recently, I decided to see if I can still have relationships. I went on one date and the guy was over-the-top hyper. It made me very uncomfortable. He also started bring up sexual things in conversation and I could...
  13. W

    Anxiety, Panic, and Hypervigilance in a Common Situation...Specifically, Driving or Riding in a Car

    I haven’t had a cat accident, but I do have agoraphobia at this point. Leaving the house for ANY reason is brutal. I have to take xanax the be able to go out. Talk therapy about the ptsd has not helped with my agoraphobia, even though it helped with other things a bit. Xanax is not great but it...
  14. W

    Doubts about starting a relationship

    As I get closer to tomorrow, when I was scheduled to go on my date, I’m finding all kinds of reason why this won’t work. I’ve been without a partner this long, I don’t even know what it means for me to be with anyone. I find myself saying I don’t have the time or the energy for anyone, and that...
  15. W

    Doubts about starting a relationship

    I’ve been single for a year and a half now. We are still in the process of a divorce, but I haven’t had any relationships... I agree that my stress cup is overflowing. Sex and intimacy is scary for me. I waited awhile... i guess I’m wondering if i should try to press through the fear, or keep...
  16. W

    Doubts about starting a relationship

    I met a guy that says all the right things. But I am noticing how paranoid and untrusting I am. I know who I am alone. But I don’t know how to be in a relationship. I have a very strong personality and a lot of intensity - I wonder how much of that is there to scare prople away? I am going on a...
  17. W

    I avoid sex

    I completely understand. I haven’t had ANY sex or sexual activity in nearly 2 years now. I on and off struggle with whether I want to change this. I don’t even feel any urges. My marriage ended, in part, because I became asexual. It’s definitely trauma related, but my husband needed to “have his...
  18. W

    Getting a job is triggering too

    @Atticus it’s fortune that you can feel the outbursts coming. I don’t know where I am with that. I’d have to be in a position to be tested. I did have rough situations recently that I handled with restraint. I hope that’s a good sign :)
  19. W

    Getting a job is triggering too

    So, I’m actually starting to get excited about the new job. The day starts at 9, which is 2 h later than when I taught. That should help me make it on time...
  20. W

    Getting a job is triggering too

    Thank you for your support. Unfortunately, I have not been successful in my recent jobs. The last one, my ptsd got so bad that i took sick leave. I’ve done that in another job. Several jobs - I was let go or laid off. It’s all been downhill for the past 7 years when my ptsd flared first. I lost...
  21. W

    Getting a job is triggering too

    I am already on medication... :) I’ve literally been on everything and what I’m on now is what seems to help the most, but not when I feel like this... I think the fear of screwing everything up gets to me. I was not able to hold down the last few jobs. The very last job, I was laid off...the 5...
  22. W

    Getting a job is triggering too

    After getting laid off, I was put in a panic about how I was going to support me and my two kids. After hustling to apply for jobs, I got a contract position. I also have 2 potential other opportunities if this one doesn’t work out. One would think I am relieved, but now I am on a whole new...
  23. W

    Therapist gone for 6 weeks

    Unfortunately, my appointment with her is 2 weeks away - I have to somehow make do until then...
  24. W

    Therapist gone for 6 weeks

    I have been in intensive treatment for ptsd with a wonderful therapist who has helped me a lot. In addition to medication, she is my counselor. Well, she had to leave for 6 weeks - I’ve been seeing her 2x per week. She did refer me to her colleague in case I need help. Of course I need help. Her...
  25. W

    Intermittent Fasting

    I agree with you @grit . I’ve changed my diet to eat only lean meats, fruits, and vegetables, almond milk over the past 6 weeks. And some days I skip dinner - maybe a couple times a week. I don’t eat any bread, sugar, dairy, or nuts. I lost 25 lbs so far and am still losing weight - nothing else...
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