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I can fully understand that and have experienced this myself. Hearing something over and over again make you believe it. When you believe it your behaviour emulates this and so you are bound by a self fulfilling prophecy. Confident people have high self esteem. They do not allow others to...

I think it is very easy for the media to blame things on mental health issues. They cannot justify or grasp the concept that bad things happen for a reason and not everything is caused by a mental illness, blaming gives reason. Having a reason to do this gives understanding, even if the...

Thank Invisible Guy and Sheila for your kind words. I am pleased that the operation went well in the end and I was let out the next day. I am pottering around the house and watching dvds at the moment and trying not to climb the walls in boredom. I thought I would start writing stories or...

Well done for getting a new job CatHerder. Hopefully a new start and a new set of people who are more mature and caring to their team members. I know what you mean about the greenery, I too feel that it calms me enough to think straighter. Best of luck and wishes in your new venture :)...

I am glad you had a good time. Be strong and let the girls who base their good time on getting wasted get on with it. They will learn that they do not need to get drunk and will also learn some hard lessons by doing so, unfortunately. You have done so well so keep to the path you feel safe...

Thanks for sharing SHeila. :) Well I am in hospital on Tuesday for a spinal operation as so far have not heard anything from my children to wish me luck. My daughter was supposed to come here today and I though it would be good to see her and my grandson before I went in. But they have not...

I think the more we come to understand the person in their own right the more we can forgive ourselves for being abused and accept that they are what they are. Sheila, if she is what she is, why are you so bothered, surprised or disappointed that she does not call? :) Out of...

Hi Lizbeth That is what I thought :) I think being true and honest is the most important thing in a relationship. I also think waiting can causes problems In my opinion, and as you say. All the time you have been waiting to get this out your relationship has not been in its truth but...

Well said Safenow. :) You are doing well and have taken the first step on a better path. Carry on with that and allow your emotions to be there. Best wishes Saffy :)

I love the poem by the way :) (((hugs)) if you let me :) best wishes Saffy :)

aw lovely dog :) You have a lovely smile and are very pretty (I hope you don't mind the compliments) :) best wishes Saffy :)

You certainly was not at fault at all Cherry1234. These boys took great advantage of you and their behaviour is disgusting and they should be ashamed of themselves. But I know how much it hurts and how much it affects you through bitter experience of being 'used' myself. My advice would be...

Sorry to hear that you are lonely Home alone. I feel the same way. For me I need to find what the connection is in a relationship if sex was not important to me. Don't get me wrong I like the thought of being intimate but have such bad past experiences that being intimate is far...

Sorry if my post was misunderstood Winterose :) Saffy :)

I think it is very important to set the ground straight away. Saying what you like and what you do not like straight away lets everyone know your boundaries for the future. Setting boundaries now will help in the long run. Making excuses or being passive will only cause trouble later on...

Wow your daughter sounds like she is strong and in control and is not prepared to run and hide from this bully. She deserves a massive pat on the back for that and so do you as parents :) His father is an idiot, he is no good to her in jail, HA, not much good out of jail either is he...

Hi Lizbeth Yes I think I have, but not in a therapy session. I think being able to let it all out honestly in a therapy session will sometimes trigger reactions you are not expected. But in a good way it is also in a controlled environment where everyone has to sit and listen to each...

My mother was a school teacher believe it or not. But realising it now it was for the control and ego not because she wanted to teach others. It was all about the kudos. She only taught up to 7 year old too as these were easier to manipulate and control. She would sit there and scoff...

ART is much more than drawing and painting, you are a musical artist :) best wishes Saffy :)

It is such a shame that she should feel embarrassed or self conscious over the actions of a non human. It is a good reminder to her that this is not love because love would never hurt in that way. I am glad you are all being so strong. Stick together that is your strength. He has no one...

Never apologise for that hun :) Saffy :)

Oh it was not my mother who did the beating it was my stepfather, based on her manipulations and my not falling for it, she would then manipulate the situation as if I had treated her terribly and unfair and was horrible and he would then beat the crap out of me for it. So I could not win...

I do this too now. But sometimes I feel I have to look between the lines in whether their no actually means no or is it just their pride talking. It is certainly a fine line as you say. You never know really what to do for the best. I always tell them not to be afraid to ask me for...

What a completer coward this nonperson is. I can't call him a man, he is far from that. I can't call him a person, he is not one of those either. Thank god your daughter and grandchildren are away from his clutches. Hopefully he will get his just deserves and end up in jail as...

That is fantastic Winterose :) I guess that is one thing he never stole off you eh :) SafeNow I hope you get a new piano to play on. Art is definitely a good therapy for the soul. Music is the sound of the soul :) best wishes to you both :) Saffy :)