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I am very aware that I always put other people first ~ their needs, what they want to do, etc. I obsess over how I can stop doing it. I read books about this problem and understand solutions. But its almost as if I run into a brick wall when I actually try to change. The awareness almost...

Just curious...how old was your brother when he died? I also believe those that were close to us in life remain with us spiritually after they die. One night I was sound asleep and I was awoken by the smell of Chanel No.5. This is the perfume my Grandma always wore. I don't own it and haven't...

Great idea on the death forum. All deaths are hard - whether they are expected (illness) or unexpected (accident). Hell, I was even down for a while when I had to put my favorite dog to sleep. I think that anyone in a dangerous job tends to joke about it as the risk of death is very real...

Ha! An "I hate x" site .... could be funny stuff. If it weren't for my kids, I'd have the ex-husband on my new site already. LOL!! Well, yesterday was weirdly cathartic. The ex-bf texted me and I responded with an answer that didn't really require another response from him. But he...

Well you know the old saying ~ If you can remain friends after a break up either you are still in love or never were. I think its tough to remain friends with somone if the feelings are strong and especially if they are one sided. Time is a great healer. Maybe after some time apart and the...

GREAT JOB!! I'm so happy you were able to get that out of your head. I agree, it feels better to purge the garbage that is clogging up the healing and good thoughts. I am not very good at writing with pen & paper - this is great for me. Anonymous venting with awesome feedback.

I crack up laughing everytime I see you call yourself in your first job a sparky. Maybe I'm a little morbid - but you certainly would spark if electocuted. Yikes! Yeah, I am the opposite of a workaholic now. Wish I would have just done the middle of the road the whole time.... Live and learn.

Yes, I did go back into the relationship knowing that it is possible his communication skills would be the same. I was also too afraid to be rejected again by him so I didn't test his communication skills too much during the relationship. I own those things. In my relationships - any of them...

To add to the above post - My ex-bf (J) was not a horrible person (I know I have bashed him a lot). I wouldn't have stayed with him for so long if he was. He was actually quite kind and caring most of the time. When we were together it was mostly at his house as he felt the safest there...

Ha! That movie is funny - and I actually remember my mom saying that a boy was being mean to me because he like me. Or a girl was being mean to me because she was jealous. I (thankfully) figured out that was bullsh*t that I didn't want to tell my kids - however for myself it may be deep rooted...

Great job getting that out! :)

I think I need that workbook too! I am fairly passive - I was always described as very laid back. I have a hard time being a b*tch too - I don't want to hurt other people. The result is I end up getting hurt or I feel used or worse. I hardly ever stand up for myself. I always figure, its not...

I have, but on the opposite end. What I mean by that is, when I got out of school I found a job as a corporate travel agent. I loved it and I took on any challenge and surpassed it. For reference most corp travel agents book about 250-300 reservations per month, I was booking 900+ each month...

Yes, that is the question. In stepping back from my relationship with J (the ex-bf), I can now see clearly all of the issues we had. But while IN the relationship I did not see those problems. So I think the fact you have the awareness is a good first step. I think that I read somewhere...

YES! This! How can I ever heal if everyone that I have ever let past my barrier has left me? The only thing I can think of doing is working on being so whole that I won't NEED anyone, so anyone who comes into my life is just the icing on the cake. Now to figure out how to do this... (plus I...

Holy smokes - we do walk similar paths as adults due to emotional issues of our childhood. I know exactly what you mean about not knowing how to take care of yourself, but taking care of others all the time. I tend to lose myself in relationships because I am so busy taking care of them, that...

Exactly, and that is what I am working on - finding "me". This outlet is helping a lot, I am reading tons of different self help books and looking into counseling again. Writing my thoughts out and getting outside feeback is really cathartic. I am not dating, nor looking to date anyone right...

My issues seem to involve relationships - both romantic and non romantic. I have lots of friends, but very few that know me well. I always keep people at an arms length by using my sense of humor. I am at a real loss right now because I feel like after this most recent break-up my sense of...

Oh, I'm sorry you are feeling that way. Does your son normally get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom? Were you more startled because you were so exhausted? I have no great advice, other than I'm listening. :) (((hugs)))

He is right, he cannot make you happy - only you can make you happy. And you can't worry so much about him that it effects your health and well being (I know, easier said than done). You are only responsible for your half of the relationship - you just need to be the best person you can be...

First off, welcome. And I'm sorry that you have to be here - but I'm glad you are here getting support for yourself and your husband. This post sets off alarms for me because I have gone through similar things with my ex-husband (not PTSD) and ex-boyfriend (has combat-PTSD). I never like...

Yay! Congratulations! You should be very proud of your hard work!

At this point it is a red flag and now that you are both aware of this issue, you can work on it together. If he is willing. We all have baggage of some sort - so if both people are willing to work on it, then there is hope. Good luck to you.

I'm sorry you are going through this Felicia - and sadly I totally get it. I was with my sufferer for 3 happy years and then poof he was gone. No warning, just gone. I have talked to him a few times in the 6 weeks we have been broken up but feel more like an option than something he is...

Thank you ashdawn. Really truly from the bottom of my heart. Your response to my rant was exactly what I needed to hear. I feel so violated and raw with emotion. I went into this relationship with an open heart and I continued that way until it blew up in my face. I have been on here...