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I've seen those lists before, and personally, I don't think that listing you're having PTSD is trivializing it. To my mind, it's a fairly neutral fact. But you do have to be aware that once you put it out there, there are no take backs and you won't be able to limit the people who know. If...

No apologies necessary. Why are you having a hard time with your t? Is it because she matters so much, or are there other things going on? Do you think the hate of the need/hate is because of the need? It's really common for people with trauma to have a hard time needing/trusting/depending on...

Yes and no. I think it absolutely is the case that the sufferer's mind gets so used to trauma that it becomes second-nature. It sees trauma everywhere, and so everything feels like danger and everything activates the fight or flight system. For me, there were whole days that consisted of...

Shannon, I'm sorry for all that you've been through and the lack of support you have. I think it's possible that your wife does love you but doesn't know how to support you. That really does happen. And sometimes us sufferers have a really hard time asking for the support that we want/need in...

I think healthy is more relative than we usually think. Isolation may not be healthy for some folks, but it can be for others. Frankly, I *need* it. When I don't have enough time alone, I don't function as well. I really need this solitude to center, calm and ground myself, to figure out what I...

Stress will definitely trigger panic attacks, and I think when you're so overwhelmed by many different stressors all at once, it can feel like a black hole because your triggers can become indistinguishable from each other and one panic attack can bleed into the next. And when you're in the...

While I do believe that friends can be a good secondary support network, I think the bulk of the heavy lifting happens in or because of therapy/counseling. Counselors have more knowledge about anxiety, depression and caretaker burnout than most friends would. Instead of turning to less...

I wouldn't.

Do they have to understand why you choose part-time jobs instead of full-time employment? Does that impact their lives in some way? Does it matter what the reasons are? It works for you, and that's all it needs to do. I think understanding is overrated. I don't need my friends or family to...

I think setbacks and plateaus are an inevitable part of the recovery process. I used to be really terrified of them, because I was afraid that lack of progress = a relapse = my completely falling apart all over again, but my counselor reminded me that it wouldn't be a relapse. I am not in the...

I'm almost positive that people with mental health issues are protected in Canada. I think any workplace and/or school is legally required to accommodate your diagnosed health issues, but I don't know if they have to be documented first (if your workplace doesn't know about them, they can't...

These situations were not your fault. You did not force your husband to punch a wall, you did not force him to yell at you, you did not force him to yell at you in public, you did not force him to rifle through your friend's belongings and invade her privacy by going through her cell phone. That...

What about contacting his sister and just doing a little bit of a check in, telling her you haven't been able to contact him and you just wanted to make sure all was well? You don't have to disclose the confidences he shared or his condition, but her response may give you the reassurance you...

Your husband is a grown man and you didn't make him do anything. How he can blame HIS decision to punch a fudging wall on YOUR alleged "chemical imbalance" is beyond me. That's not how those things work. This is unjustifiable behaviour. It's not acceptable, it's not okay, and your feelings are...

When I'm in this situation I only do what absolutely needs to be done and everything else can wait. Screw the dishes, cooking, vaccuuming and anything that will sap any more of my precious resources. 20 minutes of a trashy tv show that cheers me up and makes me feel good - yes. I am also someone...

Frankly, I don't think you're being selfish. Or if it's selfish, it's a pretty healthy kind of selfish. Who wants to be the victim of nasty outbursts? Who wants to walk on eggshells? Who wants to be in a relationship where they're not happy because they don't know when they'll have a partner who...

I'm glad you were able to talk with someone. The whole boundaries and control thing really does suck, especially at the beginning, but it does get easier and better. Will you be seeing the therapist again in the future? Good for you for taking care of you and your daughter. And please, don't...

It's harder than it seems because he is gaslighting you. Every time you think you have the whole story and begin to find some firm ground, he reveals some other piece of horrible news that destabilizes you further, but then he promises you he loves you, tells you how much you mean to him, how...

Being new myself, I don't know how to edit the post title, but you can post at the Help Desk and a moderator should be able to help. https://www.myptsd.com/c/forums/help-desk.28/

Dixie - is it possible to edit the title of your thread? If so, can you please add "combat vet" to your title? I'm just thinking that what you really need right now is advice from other combat vets or their supporters. The question about the key to the gun case worries me. Are you safe right...

It's not uncommon for people with PTSD to be angry or have anger issues, but that doesn't give him license to mistreat you. If he's using you as a verbal punching bag, he's being abusive. If he doesn't mean it, he needs to stop saying it/behaving that way. He knows he has PTSD, he knows he has...

You're not a jerk for needing praise and encouragement, but it may be a little too much to ask for from your wife right now. It may be hard for your wife to believe in or even see your positive changes for awhile, especially since it's likely the case that you had positive moments even in the...

What do you mean by going to his chain of command? As far as I understand it, his behaviour hasn't impacted his work. He is angry, but he's not being violent or abusive. He's withdrawing from his home life, and that is understandably distressing for you, but what exactly does it have to do with...

There's nothing wrong with setting a time limit to talk about things. That can be a boundary too, right? What do you need and what are you willing to give/negotiate? And these questions are seriously all about you. It's about what you can and want to give while still taking care of...

You are not expected to do anything at all, except to take care of yourself to the best of your ability. To me, that means deciding what you want, what you need, what you can accept, what you can't accept, and so on. This part is all about you. And figuring this stuff out is important - this is...