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Pole dancing

Welcome! Very glad you are here. Sounds like your childhood treatment did some things to you. You don't have to check certain boxes to have been harmed, as there are many ways for abuse to occur. Please take care.

You're not alone, I'm really struggling now too. I have't been able to go to the store; that'd be too much rn, good for you for making it to the store !

Exercise. Cleaning. Meditation. Work.

The cats are fed and their litter box is clean. I just don't want to stay in bed.

Banana muffins sound really good right now.

Welcome. Just me and my cats :)

It happens. I do my best to deep breathe and it helps some. Fear of dying alone from a germ I catch from touching a public doorhandles gets me, sometimes.

Yes, it can be challenging at times. But, great to work for myself.

I actually feel a similar way recently. I see how I keep repeating patterns, and I feel my whole life has been a big fraud I've fallen for, been duped over and over. Wayne Dyer said something like this, In order to give out a dozen oranges, you have to first go buy twelve oranges, so you...

It's just a meme that was going on around instagram. Cats are... happiness. That is all.

If you're not happy single, you won't be happy married. Happiness comes from cats, not relationships.

A tree house with passageways through the trees. All the essential rooms together. Outlying rooms are a large aerial gym and dance studio with 2 mirrored walls. Lots of skylights and a claw-foot tub. No neighbors for acres. Fields and forests of my own to roam.

I, for one, need sympathy from my therapists when I drop a bomb. Sounds like this may not be a good fit. I'd go with your gut.

I also think this is a "him" problem. Being "alone" is so much better than being in the type of relationship you have described. It does not mean you are condemning him or all things about him, but it seems you have recognized it is time to move on, for whatever reason. Easier said than done...

LOL, I thought that before I read your response. So sooo cool! Kudos to you :)

Hi GoneBy: I don't have all the answers for you, but I have suggestions. Take what you can use and leave the rest: Have you ever tried meditating, or even sitting silently? When I first started, I couldn't meditate, but I'd allow myself to sit/lie down and cry or think about whatever I wanted...

Welcome, Thinking our way out just doesn't work. I, too, am working on reintegrating into groups and people. Happy to have you.

I don't like you with this guy. I would not be with someone saying those things to me, for whatever reason. And your trauma history is not an excuse for you to take on more burdens.

Oh yes.

Hi Pablo, I hope you are doing well. Keep trying to find people who can be a part of your team is the only advice I have; you've been through a lot! It's amazing how much you've lived and you're still here trying !

Good for you! It's a big step :)

I would see him once or twice on a trial basis; see how you do with him. It's hard to tell at this point.

Yes. Several times. Sometimes you need to make your own momentum. And that may be all you know at the moment. Once you ride the wave, you can often see it clearly from hindsight. Gaining independence will give you confidence. There may be difficult times but it's worth it. Funny you posted...

Agreed.