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I get you! I am in the process of reapplying after my breakdown. I was on it before though... I'm surprised there is regular paperwork involved... Haven't they updated to online reporting? Have you tried calling them on the day that you're suppose to go in for the paperwork, and explaining...

Hi and welcome Joseph!

Yes, of course it's ok! I'm looking forward to hearing what you have to say. Everyone has just been SO helpful! :)

Yeah, I hope she's ok!

Stephanie, I know that feeling! Just rest up and maybe do some self care - I am currently giving myself a fudge Sunday facial, it feels and smells amazing. I recommend it :) ...also maybe visit your doc, you might need to up your serotonin. I've recently up'ed mine and it is making such a big...

Well done for standing up for yourself! You're right, it's totally inappropriate... No healthy person wants to be focused on sex while they are around children (or a child friendly setting). Maybe part of your anxiety is that you are feeling a bit powerless to prevent their off comments...

I really like that article. One of the ways I've tried to regain power in the past is by blaming myself, telling myself that I am responsible for what happened to me... I like that the article points out that lasting self-empowerment comes from knowing that we can control the present. Meaning, I...

Great post DMerish! The one goal I’ll focus on this week is: doing art each day. Specifically working on creating flowers that tell a visual story. I’m choosing this goal because: I need a creative vent, and more fun in my life. I’ll go about working on this goal by: Setting aside time each...

Sounds like your body is saying you still don't feel safe... Do you feel like sharing what the trigger was?

Wow! I needed to hear this SO much, it's actually the way I think - I realised as I was reading your response that its my family that has made me feel guilty for not excusing them all unconditionally. My heart agrees with what you have said- it feels good/stable/true. Thanks a million! I hope...

Hi sweetl, I think where I am now, the hate has shifted to rage-ish anger. I think the shift is mainly due to my realisation that its not personal, she owns her choices... I pity her - she missed out on having me as a daughter for the most part. Things could have been so different, if only she...

Thanks Solara! It really is sick... I'm just sorry she didn't realise how unwell she was before she died. It would have made a huge difference to me to have a genuine apology. Missantisunshine, thanks for your comments... So you don't feel the need to forgive? I've been wondering about that -...

That song is great! ...and yes that was my reasoning for why she would 'speak for' God. Many things she taught me were very warped. I'm still working my way through all the confusion I feel towards God. I'm just glad that he gave me strength to see past my anger, and recognise that my belief and...

I'm still learning to tackle head on... That's great advice re book I'll definitely keep you updated. For what it's worth, you've really inspired me today - thanks for being you!

Hi and welcome Countless!

Hi Stephanie, I need an emotional shift (when dealing with intense flashbacks) before I get into grounding exercises etc... I usually use tv to do this. I find I can become completely absorbed in a chick flick or comedy, I live through a characters eyes for a while and the intensity of emotion...

Thanks for reading Ashdawn... I know it's a loooong post! It is so comforting to know you understand! If any one of the men who raped/molested me were to die for whatever reason, I would cry... Tears of happiness and relief!!! I think that when people make a choice so dark (rape or...

How can I let go of all my anger towards my Mum? I always thought that at some point my Mum would understand the damage that she has done to my life, and be genuinely sorry for it. When I found out she was dying of cancer a couple of years ago, I started dealing with a mountain of suppressed...

Have you tried cymbalta? It's working better than any anti-depressant I've tried (I've tried plenty!) it's fast acting too.

Wow! I'd love to read your lyrics sometime Ashdawn :) Broken Girl by Matthew West has helped my healing journey. Check out the lyrics here http://m.youtube.com/watch? v=9X6h6QiFqi4&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D9X6h6QiFqi4 -no spaces

Thanks for sharing! It's definitely something I'd like to look into. I didn't realise there was something I could do about freezing. My understanding it limited i guess - I know freezing comes from the 'lizard brain' our first brain that decides whether to fight, flee, or freeze... I think in...

Hi and welcome krispykreme... I think my mouth just watered a bit.

Hi, welcome! Feel free to get involved in a post, or post your own... It's a good way to start getting to know people.

Hi and welcome Autumn Lola, I've been learning that insecurities and fear are what motivate some people to do horrendous acts... I'd like to tell you that if you drop the 'I'm ok' act, that people will rush to your side and give you the support you need. But the truth is that rarely happens -...

Just what I needed!!! Cheers!... I can't get to sleep... Sooo tired but mind just won't switch off. I tried to distract myself with 'two greedy Italians' they always crack me up and put me in a good mood... But tonight they just made me hungry. Wish I had the energy to cook myself some pasta...