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Dogs are the best version of people--they can't lie or be abusive. Your dog will never use you and wants you to be as happy as she is. I hope she gets better soon, and you, too. This may sound all middle-school-drama, but when I'm angry like you described, thrash metal helps. Put it on full...

A safe word would be good for the yelling. I usually just say please stop yelling after every sentence until he stops. Or I go away.

Thanks @Mal Content. I actually think that he needs counseling on his own first, and he's currently getting recommendations from people. The last counselor he tried was terrible (his opinion, not a projection of mine!). Our collective issues aren't as big as our individual issues, and we really...

I'm working two crappy jobs right now as a waitress--restaurants are perhaps the most dysfunctional, abusive working environments in existence. I'm looking for employment in another state that actually uses the degree I just earned, but seriously why would an obscure small town in Colorado take...

I've done well with visualization. Like: imagine X. Imagine X blowing up. Imagine X drowning. Imagine giving X a thoughtful gift, and then setting it on fire. Obviously that's not super healthy, but it helps sate my inappropriate anger responses so I can think clearly and in a more healthy way.

I prefer to call it an episode. It reminds me that it's not my normal state, or it doesn't have to be. Sometimes the way I act during an episode is so far removed from who I am that even I am shocked with myself. Being able to label those times as directly related to my mental illness helps me...

Diminishing other's pain doesn't help anyone. We can't know what others have been through, or how it affected them, or why. For me, having the diagnosis was a relief. My therapist wasn't even sure of the source, as my life has been that traumatic. She said, "It could be from this, this, or that...

my relationship: Woman with PTSD perpetually asks forgiveness from man who is bewildered by her erratic behavior. I was helped a lot by counseling. I still have irrational and misplaced anger directed at my partner sometimes, but I see it for what it is now and I'm able to discuss why it...

Yeah I did one of those gratitude letters, loaded with f*cking sarcasm. Being able to spit venom like that was purgative, for sure.

You can't fix him. You either have to wait or move on.

I share my various diagnoses (not DID) pretty early. If it's going to scare someone off, I want it to happen before I'm attached to them, because I don't need unsupportive people in my life. I would say to do it as soon as you think you want to be serious with someone.

Manipulative bastard, I'd say. He's gone and controlled how the information is presented.

A lot of churches have singles Bible-study now. I am not Christian, but my mom is and she attends a Bible study for divorced parents/older singles.

I agree with @Mal Content; counseling might be what you need. I find two things are incredibly important in PTSD relationships. The sufferer needs to be aware of their triggers and be able to announce they're being triggered in an appropriate way, and the supporter needs to know the sufferers...

((hug)) Please take care of yourself during this trying time and remember you have support here.

Cutting off toxic relations was the best thing I've ever done for myself. I wish you luck in setting and maintaining the boundaries you want. It can be difficult at first (I had to move 350 miles away and stop answering my phone for a while), but it is so worth it in the end if it makes you a...

It takes a lot of guts to break free from unhealthy habits and relationships. I'm glad you're realizing your power.

You absolutely can have normal sex life again--it was quite a shock to me when I fell into a healthy sexual relationship. Meeting someone online and then guaranteeing a blow on the first date is not a normal, healthy sex life. It's the sort of thing that retraumatizes people. If he knows you...

I believe that most people with mental illness who damage their loved ones are not bad people. I'm not a bad person, but I've done my fair share of hurting others. Similarly, I had a friend who was addicted to heavy drugs. He'd get clean for a while, and then he'd start lying an stealing again...

If it were me, I would still talk to him about the situation. Just a, "Hey, I couldn't find the pillow, did you ask someone else to get it for you? I was a little freaked out at the state of your apartment when I went because it looked like someone had been there."

Exactly--it's behavior mapping, not genetic stuff, and it definitely should not be used to excuse current negative behaviors. The thing is, it's easier to understand how and why you have the negative behaviors to begin with. It reduces blame and makes it easier to be gentle with yourself when...

I'm glad you feel able to live together until something comes along. <3

Something I did with a support group was to make a map of family relationships. It was a three generation family tree, but we drew different types of lines between people to represent controlling relationships, physical abuse, manipulation, estrangement, and every family members name might have...

I've had that problem in previous relationships. My ex-husband thought we never had sex enough. I just didn't want it, or wasn't comfortable, or had been triggered earlier and had a hard time. He knew why I was this way but just didn't get it. At one point I thought I was asexual. It's very...

I think someone I live with should know why I'm not myself at times, how I get there, and what is or is not ok to do in that moment. I don't bother explaining it to anyone else. My close friends know I have PTSD/anxiety, so I can just tell them later that I was having an episode. It's different...